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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I’m not doing anything wrong

459 replies

Viserrisk · 04/01/2025 15:12

Back to work on Monday after a lovely 2 weeks off! I’m currently reading a book (well I was before I came on here) with a glass of wine and left over Pringles from Christmas.

DH was out doing his hobby and he’s just come back home and asked me why I was drinking. I said I’m having a glass of wine, not exactly having shots rolling around everywhere. He said that I shouldn’t be drinking while looking after DC and that drinking alone in the house when it’s not Christmas anymore is “weird” DC1 is upstairs in their room and DC2 is sat on the floor playing.

AIBU?

OP posts:
ueberlin2030 · 04/01/2025 18:20

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

I'm not saying you should or shouldn't do anything, but explaining what I did. 😒

magicalmrmistoffelees · 04/01/2025 18:19

fairycakes1234 · 04/01/2025 18:17

I take everything I read on mumsnet with a pinch of salt 😊

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What’s the point though? If you’re not going to accept what the OP says, what’s the point in reading/engaging with the thread?
OP: My boyfriend is cheating on me.
You: Is he though? Maybe you’re the one cheating on him? I’m taking what you say with a pinch of salt!

Ewock · 04/01/2025 18:19

fairycakes1234 · 04/01/2025 18:17

I take everything I read on mumsnet with a pinch of salt 😊

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But you didn't, you outright said she was lying and you can "guarantee" it. Speaks more about you than anything else 🤷‍♀️

Original poster
Viserrisk · 04/01/2025 18:18

@Mydogisamassivetwat I could easily go and drink the rest but why would I want to do that when I could watch DC2 play happily with his cars or go and chat with DC1 while he’s on the PlayStation with his friends to be told to get out🥲

OP posts:
fairycakes1234 · 04/01/2025 18:17

Ewock · 04/01/2025 18:04

What a weird take. You're basically saying she has an issue with alcohol and stating she has had more than one glass. I'm presuming you don't know her, but rather are projecting. Don't force your own issues with alcohol on others.

Edited
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I take everything I read on mumsnet with a pinch of salt 😊

JudgeJ · 04/01/2025 18:16

MissJoGrant · 04/01/2025 17:30

Why do people say this every time?! There are plenty of parents that can't drive - what are they supposed to do?

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I do hope that on Christmas Day there was s designated driver at every table, the ambulance person, in case a sprout went down the wrong way or the pudding set someone on fire!

thescandalwascontained · 04/01/2025 18:15

Chowtime · 04/01/2025 15:17

Yes YABU - what if one of your children needed to be taken to hospital and you were over the limit to drive?

Hilarious. So people with children should never, ever, ever have a drink by that standard.

Bloom15 · 04/01/2025 18:15

MauveVelcro · 04/01/2025 15:24

Sitting and drinking a glass of wine at 3pm, when you're in charge of children young enough to sit on the floor and play seems very odd to me.

If I came home to dh in this exact scenario I'd probably be of the same opinion as op's dh. And whilst I wouldn't make a song and dance of it, I'd be secretly watching dh's alcohol consumption in future tbph, in case I'd missed something.

Why?

I don't get this attitude - OP isn't doing anything wrong and it would be overkill to say you'd watch it after this.

I finished work on the 20th and go back on Monday, so I am very much still in 'Christmas mode' and will be until tomorrow evening!

fairycakes1234 · 04/01/2025 18:14

Pinetreethree · 04/01/2025 18:02

Please do tell us how you know this is "guaranteed"? Do you know OP?
Because for those of us whose life has been affected by alcoholism, it would be interesting to know. Nothing about OP's posts screams "alcohol dependency" to me, but I will wait to be proven wrong.

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Ah I just know these things🤔

Pushmepullu · 04/01/2025 18:14

YABVU - no one should eat Texas bbq Pringles whilst drinking wine. They ruin your taste buds.

A glass of wine in the afternoon whilst you are chilling and watching children is fine. Men around here take their kids to pub gardens in the summer, get hammered and the kids are running around, they are not judged so harshly.

Next time have little cheesy biscuits.

Mydogisamassivetwat · 04/01/2025 18:13

Viserrisk · 04/01/2025 18:09

@fairycakes1234 I can guarantee it was just the one, just saying 😊

Wouldn’t blame you for downing the rest of the bottle after this 😆

Although, do remember to keep the reading until after your children are in bed. Heaven forbid you aren’t helicoptering their every waking moment.

fairycakes1234 · 04/01/2025 18:10

Viserrisk · 04/01/2025 18:09

@fairycakes1234 I can guarantee it was just the one, just saying 😊

Fair enough 😊

fairycakes1234 · 04/01/2025 18:09

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 04/01/2025 17:59

Well, it sounds like your imagination is running wild. You been on the gin?

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Not yet, I don't drink till after 8😊

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 04/01/2025 18:09

SnoopysHoose · 04/01/2025 18:07

To add @Hwi hiding the fact you drink from your kids is very very odd.

That's what an alcoholic might try to do. Far more worrying than letting kids see adults have a healthy relationship with the odd glass of alcohol.

Original poster
Viserrisk · 04/01/2025 18:09

@fairycakes1234 I can guarantee it was just the one, just saying 😊

OP posts:
NewFriendlyLadybird · 04/01/2025 18:09

Viserrisk · 04/01/2025 15:26

@ButFirstCovfefe I love trifle😋 Texas bbq sauce!

I’m sorry. YABU. Original is the only acceptable flavour.

NameChanger91736 · 04/01/2025 18:08

fairycakes1234 · 04/01/2025 17:57

BTW guarantee OP didn't just have one, just saying 😊 judging by amount of posters rushing off to have a gargle just because we're talking about alcohol shows how many women drink wine and not just the one glass...I still can't see how OP who stresses she very rarely drinks or goes out decides to have a single glass of wine during the day for the hell of it , just doesn't ring true, sorry, I'd say that why husband freaked😊

I went for a few drinks in December 2023 with my sister and her MIL... didnt drink all year and then on the 29th Decmber 2024 I had 2 glasses of wine at home during the day,

I cant see why OP would fib about somthing so trivial when a lot of people drink wine a few evenings a week on here and happily say so,

Original poster
Viserrisk · 04/01/2025 18:08

@BeLilacSloth In my opinion there is a difference between “drinking” and having one glass of wine. No harm has been done so drop the dramatics

OP posts:
SnoopysHoose · 04/01/2025 18:07

To add @Hwi hiding the fact you drink from your kids is very very odd.

Ewock · 04/01/2025 18:04

fairycakes1234 · 04/01/2025 17:57

BTW guarantee OP didn't just have one, just saying 😊 judging by amount of posters rushing off to have a gargle just because we're talking about alcohol shows how many women drink wine and not just the one glass...I still can't see how OP who stresses she very rarely drinks or goes out decides to have a single glass of wine during the day for the hell of it , just doesn't ring true, sorry, I'd say that why husband freaked😊

What a weird take. You're basically saying she has an issue with alcohol and stating she has had more than one glass. I'm presuming you don't know her, but rather are projecting. Don't force your own issues with alcohol on others.

Original poster
Viserrisk · 04/01/2025 18:03

@Hwi sounds like you could do with a glass

OP posts:
Elphamouche · 04/01/2025 18:03

Chowtime · 04/01/2025 15:17

Yes YABU - what if one of your children needed to be taken to hospital and you were over the limit to drive?

I’m not a drinker but this is stupid. Plenty of people don’t drive!

Op YANBU.

EdithBond · 04/01/2025 18:03

@magicalmrmistoffelees I agree.

If I’ve followed the argument correctly, it’s better to surreptitiously swig from a bottle in a brown paper bag hidden in the kitchen cupboard, than let your kids see a mother who dares have a glass of wine while reading a book and relaxing on holiday.

I have wine with our Sunday lunch after I’ve cooked it. I’m obviously a Very. Bad. Mother.

VoodooRajin · 04/01/2025 18:02

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 04/01/2025 15:26

Get a taxi ? 🙄

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Motonormativity is alive and kicking on this thread, 20% of households have no vehicle and yet manage to raise families

NameChanger91736 · 04/01/2025 18:02

SnoopysHoose · 04/01/2025 17:59

@Hwi
You are allowed to still be a person alongside being a parent.
Child is content in their room and up you go for a chat?
This every minute of every day is about kids doesn't raise well rounded people.

This. My children are playing nicely in their bedrooms, I'm downstairs, if they want to chat they will come and chat. Mine would get really annoyed with me if I kept going in their rooms to have a chat.