To think this is rude and weird re a Christmas present

Agree. I'd cool the friendship. Whatever her problem is, do not make it yours.

I think you could be on to something there. She was obviously offended by the vodka for some reason.

Or maybe she opened in front of family, who were thinking, great I'll have that? Or they were thinking fizzy wine is acceptable to ladies but vodka isn't.

While her attitude is really odd but I'd be curious to what the real issue was.

I make my own cards too and sorry but that is irrelevant

Has she form for speaking to you in this manner?
I wouldn’t be friends with someone who spoke to me like that…..bizarre!

I wonder if someone had once thought they were an alcoholic so opening a bottle of vodka caused huge problems for them with family or something….

Maybe they're all one person, or else the OP just picks really crap friends

Fantasy football

Was she being jokey and you missed the mark?

I don’t understand this at all.

She sounds like an ungrateful twat. My inner child would've probably instantly replied with "Or what?" when she said that but I don't respond very well to other adults telling me what to do.

Your update makes it clearer. Yes it's a weird reaction.

Or perhaps her perception of the two gifts is different from yours, OP.

Whereas you just wanted to give them each their favourite tipple, she might have felt self-conscious about her favourite being vodka while your other friend's is Prosecco, depending on her perception of the drinks or their pricing or other associations she might have.

She might wonder whether the other friend had rejected the vodka gift and that this is why you felt the need to go through the awkwardness of swapping them back - even if you turn up saying "oh, silly me, what a mix-up!", she might still be envisaging the other friend unwrapping the vodka and being horrified to the point of not even accepting it (especially if she happily enjoyed the Prosecco over Christmas!).

If she had said thanks for the gift initially, I probably wouldn't have taken it back from her once it was given - if the other friend didn't want the vodka, I would have replaced it with another bottle of Prosecco, but I don't think I would have requested the recipient give back a gift intended for someone else, especially not after Christmas when it might be too late for her to give it back.

I don't think she's upset about the mix-up itself, but about the way it's been handled and all the awkwardness around being asked to give back a gift she thought you'd bought for her.

If that was her actual reaction then yes it was rude. Are you sure you're not building it up bigger in your head? I sometimes do that if I feel bad for something.
My suggestion.... don't buy adult friends Christmas presents next year.

I'd put a stop to Christmas presents after that, l'm afraid.
She was so rude and unreasonable she'd be lucky to get a card.
Friends don't behave like that.

That all sounds a bit deeper than a Christmas present

She said “don’t you ever do this to me again”

"Oh, don't worry. I won't."

[thin smile]

'dont ever do this to me again'.
Don't worry love, I won't. 🙄
Was she a devout vegan and the other gift was a huge tub of pate de frois gras?
Is she a virginal 79 yo nun and the other gift was a swingers club membership?

What a silly cow. 🤣

To be honest I think the entire exchange was weird. I would never ask for a gift back from a recipient, to give to someone else. Didn’t you feel embarrassed doing that? Especially when you mention it was only cheap alcohol. You then awkwardly gave original recipient another gift later. It really wouldn’t have been a big deal for you to have kept the wrong gifts as they were and you would have saved the ill-feeling.

Just being gifted the wrong sort of alcohol doesn't seem like too much of a faux pas. Giving a female friend a beard trimmer when they were really supposed to get a nice mascara - and vice versa for a male friend - could cause some chagrin, but this is baffling!

I suspect that's the problem. She opened the first gift and liked it, opened it or regifted it to someone else. Then the OP asked her to give the gift back. That's what upset her, especially if she had to go out and repurchase the item so she could return it to the OP.

Or possibly that she’d already opened and drunk it and was annoyed at being asked for it back. Although still a huge overreaction to something that cost a tenner.

I really would struggle to stay friends with anyone who spoke to me like that over half a bottle of bloody vodka !

What did you say in response to the don’t do that to me again comment?

I’d have said, don’t worry, I don’t think we’ll be friends for long now anyway!

Although to be fair, that's presumably something you choose to do, as you enjoy it?

But she was rude

I think it was this too.

It sounds like she's annoyed that you gave her a present (that she may well have opened or regifted) and subsequently asked for it back.