Was this a typical birth experience?

Obs anaesthetist. Something doesn't add up. The only reason baby doesn't go directly to your skin in theatre is if there's a problem with either baby or you. If the problem is with yourself (unwell/vomiting too much/dizzy etc) then your birth partner will be offered skin to skin instead

If there isn't immediate skin to skin then baby will have to be dressed as the risk of getting cold is v high in newborns.

V variable which post natal wards allow partners to stay over. So likely normal

They should have answered the buzzer, they should have offered you toast or a sandwich out the fridge

I'd ask for a birthing debrief to discuss your concerns x

S2S in theatre is the default if wished and possible at my trust. In fact I think we push it too hard sometimes!

Sounds v similar to mine. I didn't want skin to skin but couldn't have done it anyway as there wasn't much of me to access.

I had a csection with my second 4 years ago. I think our experience should NOT be the norm, it definitely wasn't to me:
They cleaned and weighted DS, wrapped him in a towel, then he came straight to my chest (so that was a few minutes after he was born). Stayed with me and DH on recovery and then we went to the room after a couple of hours. By then it was around 3pm I think, it was during Covid so DH left and could only come back to pick me up the next day around 4pm (I said I wanted to go home and was good to be discharged). I had food as soon as I went to the room, had my bags and a MW even helped me change the baby's nappy as I couldn't move much due to the catheter...
So, you deserved a much better birth experience for sure, but try not to dwell on it, it won't make a difference in a year or 2... (my 1st birth experience was VERY traumatizing and I still don't talk about it, but it doesn't hurt me now as it used to)
Much love to you and your little baby!

Not standard where I work at all. Was baby fed overnight?! And when were you helped out of bed? And you should obviously have been fed and given the opportunity to dress your baby after lots of S2S.

You don't get skin to skin in theatre as a) theatre is cold for infection control b) laying flat on your back with tubes in your arms and hands and numb from the waist down makes it incredibly hard to hold the baby safely whilst not disturbing the surgeons stiching you back up.

The rest of it sounds incredibly woeful, such as the lack of food, there should be sandwiches and biscuits available at all times.

Was there any particular reason why your partner was not able to bring you food or order in a takeaway?

The bit about not receiving your bags sounds bizarre, I'd definitely raise that with the hospital.

Some of it sounds typical of my c-sections - neither of my babies were immediately put on my chest in theatre. They were weighed, had a nappy and hat put on and wrapped in blankets. I was offered them to hold after that but DH had to help me, I didn’t do skin to skin until we were in recovery an hour or two later. I don’t think that’s unusual.

DH wasn’t allowed to stay on ward, but he accompanied me there and put things within reach before he left. My buzzer was mostly answered, or I just shouted - it was a busy six bay ward so there were staff about. I think being completely ignored for five hours with a freshly born baby is dangerous (were they not doing obs at all?) and I’d complain about that - not being able to feed or change a newborn is surely a safeguarding issue!

Kitchen was closed upon my arrival on ward both times (I had morning sections but was in recovery until late at night) but I was offered cereal or toast or a sandwich. I wouldn’t expect a cooked meal but if they offered you absolutely nothing even after you asked then yes, I think you could complain.

Did you have a birth plan with you specifying you wanted skin to skin after birth? Or your husband informed and telling them that’s what you wanted in the event of a c section? That part I think is unfortunately left down to women to specify what they want to happen and for any future births I’d go in with that knowledge about your c section requests.

The second part I would absolutely be putting in a complaint about that is outrageous and shows negligence from the midwives.

Your c-section wasn’t technically planned so I’m not sure about the skin to skin part as you were already in labour and your waters had gone. I think in that respect it was better baby just coming out rather than hours of agony before needing an emergency c-section, which often happens when you try to evict a baby not ready to come out! The other stuff sounds like the staff just being shit at their job. My birth experience wasn’t great and I in part put that down to staff not doing what they were supposed to do.

Sounds pretty typical from my experience apart from not being fed - midwife’s made sure I got some basic food even if kitchen was closed.

Skin to skin isn’t their highest priority, particularly after a section, it’s not something I’d get upset about personally. The midwives might have been aware of other stuff that needed their attention over that. It’s nice to do but not essential.

I have had 4 children 3 c sections never did skin to skin contact with any of them wasn't a thing when I had mine so do not think it's necessary.

I had three c sections (although they were years ago now) and yes parts of this sound very familiar to me. It shouldn’t be that way, women deserve better.