To be upset and put off by this comment

Everyone might think that about someone from their past. Not everyone will say it out loud.

I would be asking him WHY it was so good for him?

For me that would be deeply unattractive. Sounds like negging and only insecure people do that and I couldn't find an insecure person attractive.

There are plenty of other topics people can share if they want to feel close to a partner, but mentioning how great sex was with an ex is a minefield. Personally I don't want to know about a partner's exes at all, I prefer blissful ignorance. As a PP said, we know our parents have had sex but it can be icky if they tell you about it, and I feel like that about exes. Thankfully in my dating history I've not had a bloke tell me how great an ex was, and I wouldn't dream of telling them about any of mine as there's simply no need. Some people should practice their brain to mouth filter.

Every man will say this about someone from their past. Whether they actually tell you or just think it, it will exist somewhere because it's all there is to it.
Ultimately there's more to a relationship than just sex so don't take it personally. I wouldn't like to hear it in a new relationship though, because at that time you don't want to hear about anyone else and just want to be the only one on their mind.

It wasn't a nice comment imo, no matter how open you are with each other, some things are best left unsaid.
Men are sensitive about size, maybe in a future conversation the OP could mention one of her previous lovers was very well-endowed.

It’s a bizarre thing for him to mention in my opinion. I have exes where we weren’t compatible but the sex was great and guess what — not once did I feel the need to tell my husband about that. Why would I?!

Nothing objectively wrong with the comment, but I wouldn’t be attracted to the sort of person who would say that. Basically saying his ex was great in bed. Wayaay too much info and pretty low EQ to think a new partner would want to hear it.

I think most people interest in their partners past sexual experiences is limited tbh.

This 100%

I hope you told him your ex was amazing in bed too, to see his reaction.

But presumably your sister didn’t tell her husband she thought sex with her ex was much better than sex with him? It’s more to do with being this candid with the person you are currently intimate with rather than being candid or sharing with friends to whom the comment would have no consequence on.

A colleague of mine at work once told her current boyfriend in a lighthearted conversation when discussing exes that “it didn’t work out with him because he didn’t make her happy. He was a proper man though. Very masculine”. That comment (regardless of whether it was true) caused considerable hurt to her then partner and I’m not sure it ever left his thoughts after she said it. I’m not sure why it needed to be said. It was terribly unkind. Loads of people will take it as a comparative statement whether one meant it that way or not.

I agree with you. It's a bit icky and would make me feel weird and self conscious.

Surely it's about motivation? If he said it to make you feel like you have to compete or to 'warn' you about his sexual needs, he can fuck off. But if he just overshared a bit after a bottle of wine in a conversation that was always going to touch on some potentially tricky subjects, then let the dust settle and see if it still bothers you when it's not quite so recent!

And, to echo others, you don't have to have sex with anyone.

Im gultiy of this i said it to ex about an ex he asked what was my ex like so i told him we didnt get along but the sex was good.
My sister once told me best sex of her life was not with her husband it was with an ex years before they met.
I dont see a problem with being honest about it.

Definitely TMI.

I have no idea why so many posters are suggesting you're being immature or extreme. You felt uncomfortable with his comment, you've told him where your boundaries are, and you've communicated them clearly and calmly.

Ignore anyone who suggests you're wrong to feel how you do. People who would be fine with this are free to be, just like you are free to not be fine with it.

It's only been three months. If you decided this was enough reason to call it off it's not like you'd be flying off the handle over one incident in 20 years of married bliss. This is when you're getting to know someone, and if you're not happy with what you're finding out it's totally reasonable to decide he's not the one for you. If you think it was a blip and he's taken what you've said on board, you wouldn't be 'wrong' for seeing how it goes, either.

Trust your gut OP.

In my experience men always manage to bring the conversation around to sex, whether it's relevant at that moment in time or not. Personally I would be put off too by his comment but then, like I said, everything seems to boil down to sex with men. For example, just recently a guy I work with was telling me how he went to a school reunion and how he didn't recognise so many of his old classmates. They'd all be mid fifties now. I smiled and said I'd had a similar experience some years ago. He then said "yes, but I'd slept with half the women when I was younger". Cue end of conversation for me. Just why do they have to do it?

God...how distasteful.

Personally I would take it that sex with you is not as good as his ex, and so I wouldn’t be happy about him revealing that information!

I think there’s being open, and then there’s being a bit too open. There was no need for him to frame his comment that way. This would put me off too.

Goodness. Lots of extreme stuff on here today

you must know he’s had fantastic sex. And I find the comment mature, he had great sex but knew the relationship didn’t work.

there is nothing to be jealous about. Honestly.

I wouldn’t want to hear that either. You’re lovers, not friends.

I would tell him how you felt so he could moderate himself in future.

I wouldn't take it that way. I think he likes having sex with you and thinks you're compatible and also liked having sex with her, but didn't view them as compatible and was rather badly expressing that he wasn't just with you for sex by illustrating using past experience that he wasn't prepared to remain in a relationship, even if the sex was good, if it lacked compatibility.

Btw I didn’t mean he hadn’t had sex before.. or that we stopped having sex… 🤦🏻‍♀️ was referring to something that took place during..

digging a hole (😬🤦🏻‍♀️) now. Stop talking 🤐