Badly behaved NYE guests

I wouldn't be having them or their children back. Ever. Rude as.

I wouldn’t even be acquaintances with somebody this ignorant, and rude. I wouldn’t have accepted her coming over in the first place, just because her plans fell through. Why should you have to be a back up plan, and second choice? That is disrespectful enough, before she even arrived, You sound lovely op, but please don’t let people take advantage of you. I have learnt this lesson myself.

Nope don't have them back. I had this one year. Drunk husband threw up all over my downstairs loo to cap it all.

Hi Jane!

I'd be tempted to invite her back for another round, but then i am Not Nice and like cheap entertainment....

Also, i thought all the Mitford Girls were dead. How did they find this thread?

Quite.

If my mother told me I was sitting at a table. I was sitting at a table.

Carrying on the way these kids carried on?? My feet wouldn't have touched!

Same.

They sound like the kind of parents who come to a party and expect everyone else to parent their children or at the very least keep them safe and occupied. It’s rude, lazy and entitled.
She knew the format of the party, if he kids don’t like sitting at a table they didn’t need to come. And the fact they invited themselves last minute shows how bad mannered they are.

You certainly can get children to sit at the table. You start at an early age at meal times with you all together eating. No getting away from the table until you have finished eating and definitely no running around the room during the meal. My DC would always ask to leave the table. In fact our eldest would still ask in her late teens.

Never have them again.
Have had similar, including snark from the mother, so feel your pain.

Given that the youngest child was 7, I think it's utterly reasonable to expect them to sit at a table and eat. SURELY?!
Good God, we expected DC younger than that to sit through a main course. Then they'd all go and play, and come back for dessert later.

I’m not surprised that Jane’s children don’t know how to behave because their parents don’t know either - they wouldn’t be receiving any further invitations from me.
Not that it makes any difference I call my lounge/front room the living room, it’s one of 3 rooms we have downstairs the other 2 being the kitchen and the dining room.

They sound incredibly rude. Thank goodness there was a cab going or they might still be there.

I'd be put out by having to message at 7.30 to find out where they were. Any decent person would have let you know they were running late before 7.00.

I don't know anyone who would turn up to a dinner at someone's house without a gift or contribution of some kind.

And I wouldn't be impressed with someone who didn't monitor their children's behaviour. Did she even apologise for them messing with the make up?

YANBU. I don't think I'd invite them again.

To be fair, I have some friends whose kids have behaved in ways that have surprised me whilst out and about/at parties and who for that reason I wouldn't be keen to have them in my house tbh. Although the friends themselves I'm sure wouldn't act like OP's friend...apart from a few with the getting bling drunk bit, I do have a few friends who are heavy drinkers at social events and have had trouble getting home and needed assistance which is something that has never happened to me..so it definitely can be real to have friends whose behaviour is very different from your own.

Yes you can.

There's always a person or family who are a total pain in the arse at a home party of any size- my friend had a fun party a few weeks ago and one single woman ( middle aged like nearly all of us) was apparently trying it on heavily with the party givers partner.

Well, thank you Hyacinth Bucket!
It's not a word I would use but do you know what is considered an absolute etiquette no-no?
Correcting other people on their choice of language.
Only the word kind of wannabe would be so crass, vulgar and ill-mannered as to interrupt and tell someone that their word choice was non-U.

I'm confused. Were Jane and family originally invited but declined because of other plans which then fell through ? If not they were cfers from the get go to invite themselves.
But anyway my answer next time would be a firm no as its a sit down meal again and as you said yourself your DC won't sit at a table.

You can, and should have, if you're going to take them to events like this, taught your kids how to behave in someone else's house, i.e. not wandering around without asking and not to touch other people's things unless they've been told they can. But, in any case, they weren't being expected to sit at the table, they were already elsewhere, watching TV (because they clearly didn't know how to behave at a table anyway).

Because the OP's character is clean living and socially aware whilst Jane's character along with her feral family are disrespectful chavs. These two just wouldn't be friends!

AIBU to think this is poor behaviour and not invite them back?

I would not entertain her again. She can spend next NYE in the ditch she was obviously dragged up in.

Bye bye Jane 👋