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Original poster

Colleague has thrown everything away that was on my desk

436 replies

WinkyTinky · 02/01/2025 11:27

Back to work after Christmas and a few weeks off sick, to find that one of my colleagues who sometimes works at my desk has thrown away all of my papers. It was mostly handwritten notes about kids' appointments, my holiday plans, lists of things to remember about school, school calendars, and my eldest son's GCSE timetable. It was all personal sentimental stuff that I liked to have on my desk to see and remind me. I asked where it all was and he said that he has "got rid of all the crap." I'm really disappointed and a bit furious actually, but he thinks it's all perfectly fine. I know I'm a ridiculous softy about a lot of things, but this was MY stuff.

OP posts:
Girlsjustwannahavefunno1 · 03/01/2025 20:07

To be honest it is a bit sh*t but i don't expect there is much you can do & as much as it isn't acceptable he probably thought you weren't there & it is confidential information about your son that you probably did not want falling into the wrong hands & he probably did not know when /if u were coming back & thought it was best to chuck it rather than someone find it who shouldn't have it. He might have thought he was doing you a favour (not justifyng it , some people are twats anyway).

Nanny0gg · 03/01/2025 20:04

Laura95167 · 03/01/2025 20:02

If it's a shared desk it's partly your fault for leaving it out. I understand why you're upset but not of the things you've described would have obvious sentimental value I.e. photos, kids drawings, mugs etc.

He found a stack of lists that looked old, GCSE time has passed, its likely the appts were "old" too and probably thought he was just tidying. Doesn't sound deliberately nasty.

Why don't you get one of those desk planner pads for future? Then it's clear what it is, or lock your scribbles up when you leave

Edited

You didn't read her posts, did you?

Laura95167 · 03/01/2025 20:02

If it's a shared desk it's partly your fault for leaving it out. I understand why you're upset but not of the things you've described would have obvious sentimental value I.e. photos, kids drawings, mugs etc.

He found a stack of lists that looked old, GCSE time has passed, its likely the appts were "old" too and probably thought he was just tidying. Doesn't sound deliberately nasty.

Why don't you get one of those desk planner pads for future? Then it's clear what it is, or lock your scribbles up when you leave

Nanny0gg · 03/01/2025 20:01

battairzeedurgzome · 03/01/2025 07:07

Do you have hoarding tendencies? If so, please get some help sooner rather than later. Attachment to 'stuff' can take over your life.

OFGS

Codlingmoths · 03/01/2025 19:49

WinkyTinky · 03/01/2025 19:40

Sorry @asrl78 I don't mean to be arsey, but there is no data protection or GDPR issue here, they were my little scribbles and doodles to remind me of the kids doctors and hospital appointments and other such things. Yes I could keep a digital diary, but I am telling you now, I would forget to look at it. When I have physically written something down, and heaven forbid made a little drawing, then I will remember. Yes I used highlighters, different coloured pens, drew little stars and swirls, all while still being able to get my work done and do a really good job every single day. Why should I not do that?! I realise it's not the biggest problem in the world, obviously, it's just disappointing. My bloody husband does this as well, and quite frankly my desk is my haven, and now that's gone as well.
Just to add, the reason he sometimes has to use my desk is that there is certain software which is only on my pc. In fact, I had to show him how to use some of it today.

Show quote history

Did you say when you started, ‘ok but we can only do this if you can manage to sit here without taking any of my personal items and chucking them in the bin?’

Codlingmoths · 03/01/2025 19:47

Anywherebuthere · 03/01/2025 18:22

Is there a clear desk policy? On my team we are all responsible for our bank of desks, not just our own. If you're the last one out you make sure its clear all around.

Things get binned or locked away. Nothing should be left out at all. There are some people who have tried to claim spots by leaving personal items out. They are quickly reminded of the rules.

If you read the ops post this has all been fine for over a decade so no there is no clear desk policy, just wanker colleague

PollyValente · 03/01/2025 19:45

Anywherebuthere · 03/01/2025 18:22

Is there a clear desk policy? On my team we are all responsible for our bank of desks, not just our own. If you're the last one out you make sure its clear all around.

Things get binned or locked away. Nothing should be left out at all. There are some people who have tried to claim spots by leaving personal items out. They are quickly reminded of the rules.

God's teeth.

Original poster
WinkyTinky · 03/01/2025 19:40

asrl78 · 03/01/2025 17:59

It was very bad/thoughtless of him to do that but if it was a hot-desk or something simlar where someone else could use it, I would recommed avoiding leaving stuff for any significant length of time if practical. It is not secure and you have no control over who looks at it or handles it. If it is notes you find useful make it digital and put write and/or password protection on the files, then no-one is going to destroy the information. Written notes on a desk are the most insecure way of storing data.

Edited

Sorry @asrl78 I don't mean to be arsey, but there is no data protection or GDPR issue here, they were my little scribbles and doodles to remind me of the kids doctors and hospital appointments and other such things. Yes I could keep a digital diary, but I am telling you now, I would forget to look at it. When I have physically written something down, and heaven forbid made a little drawing, then I will remember. Yes I used highlighters, different coloured pens, drew little stars and swirls, all while still being able to get my work done and do a really good job every single day. Why should I not do that?! I realise it's not the biggest problem in the world, obviously, it's just disappointing. My bloody husband does this as well, and quite frankly my desk is my haven, and now that's gone as well.
Just to add, the reason he sometimes has to use my desk is that there is certain software which is only on my pc. In fact, I had to show him how to use some of it today.

OP posts:
HotelDuVine · 03/01/2025 19:16

He sounds unpleasant. This act was in character it seems. He should have put the stuff in the drawer.

I am amused by the idea of a gcse timetable having sentimental value ;-) I hated the things!

BubblesMacgee · 03/01/2025 19:12

Any chance these went into recycling and can be hunted out? Inform HR and go in hard - he has been very unpleasant.

DreamW3aver · 03/01/2025 19:07

Anywherebuthere · 03/01/2025 18:22

Is there a clear desk policy? On my team we are all responsible for our bank of desks, not just our own. If you're the last one out you make sure its clear all around.

Things get binned or locked away. Nothing should be left out at all. There are some people who have tried to claim spots by leaving personal items out. They are quickly reminded of the rules.

I dont think we know, it's not been mentioned yet.

DreamW3aver · 03/01/2025 19:05

Toptops · 03/01/2025 18:20

He shouldn't have binned it but you shouldn't have all that personal stuff on your desk. Gives the impression work is a bit of a sideline for you

How does that work for people who wfh? Their whole work environment is literally personal stuff. Is it professional to do work at home but an indication of a sideline to take a little bit of home to work?

Waitingforthesnow · 03/01/2025 18:54

He hates women - using the ladies toilet, leaving graffiti there about a former female colleague, disposing of your personal notes while you were absent through illness. I’d leave a message about his pathetic manhood in your loos, add salt to his tea, make it my duty to tidy his desk, try to make him uncomfortable

Nanny0gg · 03/01/2025 18:46

Anywherebuthere · 03/01/2025 18:22

Is there a clear desk policy? On my team we are all responsible for our bank of desks, not just our own. If you're the last one out you make sure its clear all around.

Things get binned or locked away. Nothing should be left out at all. There are some people who have tried to claim spots by leaving personal items out. They are quickly reminded of the rules.

OFFS

Not there isn't!!

MrsMrsD · 03/01/2025 18:46

And this is one reason I will always be self employed!! If someone binned my things off my desk and thought nothing of it I'd be sacked for gross misconduct no doubt. The CF!

thescentoflillies · 03/01/2025 18:44

That's outrageous, spiteful, behaviour. And a nasty note to start the New Year on. YADNBU!

BenditlikeBridget · 03/01/2025 18:37

Why would he have to work at your desk, does he not have his own?

NovemberMorn · 03/01/2025 18:35

JoannaGroats · 03/01/2025 18:32

ARRRRGGGHHHH

Show quote history

Some threads are reminiscent of a warped Ground hog day.😱

JoannaGroats · 03/01/2025 18:32

Anywherebuthere · 03/01/2025 18:22

Is there a clear desk policy? On my team we are all responsible for our bank of desks, not just our own. If you're the last one out you make sure its clear all around.

Things get binned or locked away. Nothing should be left out at all. There are some people who have tried to claim spots by leaving personal items out. They are quickly reminded of the rules.

ARRRRGGGHHHH

Over It Abandon Thread GIF
Anywherebuthere · 03/01/2025 18:22

Is there a clear desk policy? On my team we are all responsible for our bank of desks, not just our own. If you're the last one out you make sure its clear all around.

Things get binned or locked away. Nothing should be left out at all. There are some people who have tried to claim spots by leaving personal items out. They are quickly reminded of the rules.

Toptops · 03/01/2025 18:20

He shouldn't have binned it but you shouldn't have all that personal stuff on your desk. Gives the impression work is a bit of a sideline for you

sabbii · 03/01/2025 18:16

WinkyTinky · 02/01/2025 11:27

Back to work after Christmas and a few weeks off sick, to find that one of my colleagues who sometimes works at my desk has thrown away all of my papers. It was mostly handwritten notes about kids' appointments, my holiday plans, lists of things to remember about school, school calendars, and my eldest son's GCSE timetable. It was all personal sentimental stuff that I liked to have on my desk to see and remind me. I asked where it all was and he said that he has "got rid of all the crap." I'm really disappointed and a bit furious actually, but he thinks it's all perfectly fine. I know I'm a ridiculous softy about a lot of things, but this was MY stuff.

That would count as bullying behaviour at most companies and a disciplinary offence. Raise it with your manager

YMZ · 03/01/2025 18:13

Make a formal complaint. There could have been confidential info of either you family or of clients and she gambled with that.

Ariana12 · 03/01/2025 18:12

WinkyTinky · 02/01/2025 11:34

It's my desk, but while I was off he would have done some of my work here. I know I could have kept things in my drawer, but I have them out where I can see them so I don't forget things. He hasn't touched anyone else's desk. Tbh he can be a bit of a nasty twat, and in a way I'm not surprised, but I am just really sad to lose my notes.

Throwing someone else's handwritten material away without consulting them is really really poor. Calling it "crap" is rude and unprofessional. The fact that it's your desk makes it potentially a disciplinary matter. Is HR any good?

JoannaGroats · 03/01/2025 18:11

asrl78 · 03/01/2025 18:00

Just because you can doesn't mean you should.

Show quote history

You can’t throw away other people’s property. Which means you definitely shouldn’t.

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