Mum is blocking my 2yo’s invites to play dates

@SerialLurker997 my DC are close to your age now. Looking back, their transitions through nursery, primary and senior schools were all relatively brief.

I have no memories of any of the nursery mothers and dd, she was there until 4, remembers only one child. DS remembers no children from nursery.

The bitch pond for us was the leafy, lovely cofe primary. DS had a close circle of alpha boys but the mothers were awful. As the boys went up the school some of them became awful. Their behaviour was no dissimilar to their parents. DD had a much nicer year group. Cohorts differ.

DH left aged 8, DD aged 11. The bitch pond dilutes as they get older because parents stop organising play dates.

One friendship between parents endured. Interestingly it's DH who occasionally has a beer with DS's cricket dads.

Smile and drop op. Tinkly laugh. Keep interactions to those which are necessary and don't get invested. The parents of your DC's friends are not your friends and the petty jealousies that existed in the upper thirds persist into adulthood. Just like in the upper third (Y8 nowadays) hear all, see all, say nowt.

Well you're human and I think when you have kids it's easy to get wrapped up in the people you find in your immediate environment and so you want them to like you. They are people who are easy and convenient to spend time with because you're at the same stage of life with kids the same age and you find yourself at the same time, same place every day with these people. Sometimes you get lucky and get to find a genuine connection based on personal interests but that doesn't always happen.

I'd stick with C and completely ignore the other two. Grey rock. They're not the be all and end all. Make sure you initiate your own playdates and meet ups. A is probably feeling threatened by you for some reason and B needs to grow a backbone.
IME, people like this always end up the losers as other people start to see their true colours and back off. My money is on A and B having a big bust up and B trying to get back in with you and C. Either way, fuck em. Do your own thing.

Bleeghhh I was so happy when my dc left to go to secondary school and I no longer had to stand in a playground full of parents. I'm sure the kids were nicer and kinder than their parents most of the time.

In your shoes I'd just ignore A and B, keep your friendship with C but try not to get into too many gossip sessions about A and B unless you completely trust her. Start to widen your friendship circle and avoid the cliques.

By the end of my time at primary school I had 2 good friendships out of it, who I still socialise with now. The rest I never speak to or hear about. My dc don't talk to anyone they went to primary with and have good friendships made in secondary and college.

Standard! There are always a few like this. It's very off putting.

Difficult as it is, say nothing. They would be delighted to get a rise out of you.

Can you have a word with the school that whole class meet ups for 3 classes are being organised and your child was left out?

The school should send a email / letter reminding parents that excluding children is not allowed in this way.

I thought this, surely C is being a friend.
I've seen threads were people are wondering why they are being excluded and want to know why.
Is friend C meant to keep quiet even though she knows the reason and OP is asking her?

and has shown OP proof of A and B's messages moaning at her for sticking up for OP.

Yeah, that's not what a good friend does.

FFS people, C is the good guy here!!! 🙄

OP has said she is a good friend now, outside of the school setting, and has shown OP proof of A and B's messages moaning at her for sticking up for OP.

Sadly some parents regress to the age that their children are and start playground politics and nastiness.

You’ve had some advice about now. As for the future, firstly I would try to send your dc to a school other than the one A sends her dc to. Secondly, you have an advantage with an older child. For reception year, do a whole class party and get to know some mums there.

It's the terminology

You're the one who has repeatedly referred to it as a school and used the phrase 'entire school', while accusing posters who pointed out this is incorrect of being petty. You can't have it both ways.

I just wonder if there’s some jealousy from A and B sounds a weak, grovelling type who has dropped you in order to cosy up to A.

Ignore, stick with C, make other friends and find other play dates for the little ones. Just forget them - they are poison, don’t drink it.

Set up your own better clique. Success is the best revenge. Do not say anything negative or go round there.

I'd be making efforts to move away from this group. I've witnessed this type of behaviour and as much as it feels juvenile being part of it, it does hurt. I've found friendships I've made through my children to be the most flaky. If you want to continue to meet with them for your child to have playdates, then just see it for what it's is and mentally disassociate from them. But personally I wouldn't want to waste my time hanging around someone who I knew didn't like me.

They sound pathetic and tedious.

Your boy is only 2, he's not old enough to make his own friends yet. Make some new friends for him whose parents aren't insane.

The fact is, your child is of Nursery age. At 2, most toddlers struggle to name who they play with! My grandchildren never went on ‘play dates’ with other children from nursery, and the eldest only started to do so once he started in Reception. But then again, most of my peers grandchildren go to nursery because their parents have jobs and dont have time to swan around having coffee meetings with other mums.
Once mat leave finishes, most parents return to work in the real world.

Hold on, so when you said the entire school was invited, that was nonsense, wasn't it? No one's inviting 18 year olds to soft play!

OP you have described the exact reason I never became involved in school mum cliques.There is always somebody who will feel hurt & left out,especially if they don't gel with the whole group.I allowed my children to make their own school friends rather than enforce friendships upon them just because I got on with their mothers. My close friends had children around the same age so they never went short of pre-school company when we got together.

As the school runs from 2 to 18, they are almost certainly already at a private school.