To break up with him for love hearting a bunch of women's pictures?

Some boundaries should not require setting and should automatically be the bare minimum. This is one of them.

Quite the opposite - it’s a very mature decision

And they keep company with other thick sleazy men, hence the 'every man does it.'

You broke up over text message and you explained your boundaries over a text?

how old are you? 18?

that’s not how grown ups conduct relationships - they clearly and proudly talk about what they need in a relationship, setting boundaries (this one is totally fair) and gauging how the other person responds.

then you get to ask their boundaries and wants and needs in a relationship and you build a synthesis of those needs together - or decide you can’t make it work as you are too far apart and end the relationship.

OP - I know I’ll get shot over this and frankly I’m only reading your replies so “hi” to everyone else quoting me - but - you don’t sound as if you know how to communicate in a relationship at all. You can’t expect people to read your mind and you absolutely cannot garden a relationship over text messages. You need to be able to look someone in the eye and explain what your boundaries are. Not dump them over text and then block them that’s childish.

Every bloke I know who does this is either thick or pretty sleazy - usually both combined-

I think the text ending the relationship is a great way to explicitly state OP's boundaries, but I suspect you think she should have tried to train him by setting out her expectations so he can pretend to abide by them (except when his balls do the thinking?)

"Courtesy to the next gf" .

As a few PPs have noted, walking down the street and mentally noting 'she's hot' is not the equivalent of putting love hearts on FB posts. The actual equivalent would be scrolling down your FB feed and mentally noting 'she's hot'.

Oh look, the obligatory “male here” post mansplaining how we should accept this, and that all men do it.

This happened on every post like this on here these days. In fact, you post anything remotely sexual and a man will come along and post some gaslighting BS informing us our boundaries are wrong 🙄

I wish Mumsnet would have a space on here only women can post

What do you know? A man has appeared to explain that this kind of thing is normal. No it isn't. I get that photos of women appear on social media and you may well look, but I absolutely disagree that it's a normal or common thing to interact, thus generating more of the same. I find the idea of a man actively 'liking' a photo of a scantily clad stranger creepy and a bit pathetic. This kind of shit shouldn't be normalised.

You have absolutely done the right thing OP.

Ugh, is he 12? Good for you OP, he sounds like a creep.

It's not a shit start to the year, it's a fabulous one. Starting the year afresh and not wasting any more time - that's a great thing.

Well done op. The more women who don't put up with this shit any more, hopefully the less men will behave so entitled.

How have we got to the stage that rather than be embarrassed and ashamed that they've been caught looking at porn (I know different ti the op so slight tangent) men have twisted it to shaming the girl that they're not 'cool girl' enough to allow it!

@MonkeyVsBunny

don’t over react. He’s not cheating on you it’s the same as seeing a women in the street and mentally noting “hot”.

It's not the same at all.

The equivalent to him publicly liking something on social media would be him saying out loud "hot" so other people, including OP, could hear it.

The online equivalent to mentally noting something in person is still mentally noting something - a private reaction.

Not a public one, which is what a social media like is.

@MonkeyVsBunny

don’t over react. He’s not cheating on you it’s the same as seeing a women in the street and mentally noting “hot”.

I would find it so unbelievably unattractive not because I would be jealous or worried he's 'cheating' but because it's embarrassing for a grown man to be publicly liking pictures of tits etc on Instagram.

I'd be especially turned off by a man liking pictures of a woman who recently slept with 100 men in a day to gain publicity. The idea of 100 men lining up to have sex with the same women one after the other is so disgusting to most women that they would question the moral compass of a bloke who found it attractive.

It's not always down to jealous if a woman finds this behaviour a red flag or a relationship ender. Sometimes it's just because we think it's embarrassing and makes us cringe so much we get the ick and can't get past it.

fuck off with that shit.

Just because you publicly like the hot pictures on social media, doesn't mean that all men do.

Frankly it's tacky and sexist

😂 No, every man on the planet does not do this. YOU do this and other select sleazy men. If you’re upset at being in that group, then do better. If you don’t care, then accept that it’s something unique to sleazy men and that it’s your choice to be one of them.

@MonkeyVsBunny they really don’t. DH doesn’t have SM, partly because he doesn’t see the appeal of looking at what other people are doing. If you and your mates are very focused on what other people look like and think, you may think it’s normal.

I used to use a pool regularly, confident that everyone there was busy enjoying the sun and water, hanging out with neighbours and spending time with their kids. I stopped going after a friend’s husband watched a woman walk past and said ‘phwoar, look at that!’. Totally ruined it. Other people don’t exist for you to mentally rank them as they pass.

You don't need permission to dump him.

You can end a relationship for any reason you like, even if it's just that you don't like the colour of his socks.

The whole point of dating is to see if you are a match, you aren't so it's a "Thank you, next!" situation.

Just for the sake of clarity and so he doesn't think it's a drunk NYE text last night, I would reply to his "alright?" Text with a "Hi X, as said last night I am no longer interested in pursuing a relationship with you, please don't contact me again and I wish you luck in the future". Then block.

Massive red flag. I wouldn’t be with anyone like this.

Good for you, OP. YANBU at all.

They really do NOT!! Maybe you and your friends do, real men do not feel the need to like strangers' half naked photos...

Every man on the planet really does like the occasional hot picture on social media, yes.

Would you like to bet your house on that.....

Awww when your balls are doing the thinking do they sprout thumbs and interact with the big boobed reel too?