Aibu to think skiing is not an essential skill!

The idea that not learning how to ski as a child will mean you're excluded from certain social circles or even professions seems bizarre to me. Yes, lots of posh people ski but there are plenty who don't.

I was privately educated. Some kids went on the school ski trips, but lots didn't. Some families went on ski holidays, but some didn't. It was a complete non-issue.

I went on a holiday with a group of friends to a ski resort when I was in my early twenties. There were a couple of very advanced skiers, a couple of complete beginners, most were middling but some didn't ski at all. The non-skiers just read books, pottered around the town together and did other activities during the day and then we all met up for dinner and drinks in the evenings. Most cared more about the apres-ski than actually being on the slopes!

FIL loves skiing and MIL has never been on skis, yet somehow miraculously their marriage has survived!

It might be a class marker but I think there are others that are far more significant.

On the plus side, my dislike of skiing means DH takes DS in February half-term without me 😁

So you see - it IS an essential skill after all.

they think it's an essential skill for their children to learn.

It might be if they intend to hob nob with the fancy folk. 😀

I’m not wholly convinced swimming is an essential skill for everyone these days. Some people, depending on location and occupation, yes.

But having been an avid swimmer as a child, it’s been years since I was near a pool. I’ve been on a few boat trips in recent years, but were the boat to capsize into the North Sea miles offshore, I doubt I’d be able to keep myself conscious in the frigid waters long enough to actually attempt a swim to shore.

I wonder whether skiing will continue to have such cultural capital going forth. There is less and less snow around and even the Swiss are less bothered about having to do it.

DH and DS love skiing. I don’t. DH wouldn’t have persisted with taking DS skiing if he didn’t enjoy it.

We don’t class it as an essential skill in our house.

On the plus side, my dislike of skiing means DH takes DS in February half-term without me 😁

It’s absolutely this. Each to their own

I don’t disagree.

This

I wouldn't class it as essential but if your brother wants his DC to learn, why not? No different from any other pastime or hobby.

Do the kids enjoy it, though? I go on plenty of holidays/trips (e.g. theme parks) that involve things I don't love, because my kids do love it.

Regardless, even if they hate skiing, I bet they love fondue, hot wine and mountain views. They are getting something out of it on a personal level.

And imagine talking about 'marrying down' in 2025 🙄

It's not a hobby of his as he & his wife hate it! They go as they think it's essential for their kids to be able to ski.

That's pretty daft, especially if they have any limitation at all on holiday time and funding. Surely if you want your kids to have this 'cultural capital', and think they'd enjoy it, that's what school ski trips are for?

Re swimming, apart from the pros and cons of safety, that's a very different matter for British people - we live on a wet island not a snowy mountainous one, so there are loads of different watersports available, often quite cheaply.

Oh god, what nonsense.

People from all class backgrounds can learn to ski if they want to and can afford the trip.

Are you serious? You know damn well it's not essential. Did you actually need MN to confirm this? 🙄

It’s not ‘survivors’ bias’. People who can’t swim are highly unlikely to be in or around water for leisure purposes in the first place.

I don't think it's at all essential but I can see it's a skill that's good to get in childhood and there is a class element. I don't ski so my children probably won't ski, it isn't a money thing but the only way to change that would be a holiday where the children learn and we don't.
I don't think I care enough but I have wished I could ski over the years as it looks fun and I have missed out on joining in holidays with more middle class friends I met through work/ later in life.

For me the interesting thing is whether or not the children enjoy it. If they do, it’s perfectly reasonable for them to holiday in this way, if it is something they can afford. I do find it a little odd that both adults don’t enjoy it though - I can maybe see a future where I send DH and teen DS’s off skiing if I can’t get the hang of it.

if the kids don’t like it I would prioritise other holidays - especially city breaks.

Well of course it's not essential but it's rather lovely. It's up to your family what they spend their money on.

@Clickoclock of course it isn't an "essential skill" but you are being unreasonable in taking his poor phrasing literally ... what he really means is that it is "cultural capital", he just doesn't know how to express that. Next time he says it, rather than scoffing, say something like "I've often puzzled over why you say skiing is essential, but I think what you mean is that it is valuable cultural capital, yes?" He may even thank you for correcting him.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Culturalcapital

There's nothing wrong with building cultural capital. Schools often use this phrase internally when planning trips and experiences for their students (including skiing trips!)

He says nothing because he knows they're embarrassing and pretending to be richer than they are.. unless the wife comes from a family that always went skiing and married down to your brother? No offence, i'm sure your brother is lovely!

And how many people who fall in and save themselves can swim

But you don't hear about those people. Classic survivor's bias

Skiing is a nice skill but not essential. We're going next week. But I don't know many people who go skiiing.

He could answer you but doesn't, as you're being a shit stirrer.

Oh so they're really doing posh on a budget thing. Rich people can see through wannabe's it's embarrassing and they won't be accepted or seen as one of them because there will be signs of their differences. It's as username Chicken said above not belonging in that fancy firm.