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To complain about a GP calling me this?

367 replies

lolit · 31/12/2024 21:37

He called me a good girl while examining me. Should I complain or am I overreacting?

OP posts:
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5
Scotland32 · 01/01/2025 18:47

Kimmeridge · 31/12/2024 21:39

What exactly would your complaint be??

It was patronising yes but you either address it at the time or forget about it

Completely over reacting to be considering making a complaint

Edited

Yes. Agree with this

ForsterMcLennan · 01/01/2025 18:14

ColourBlueColourPurple · 01/01/2025 18:09

Erm...thanks? What a strange comment.

Strange? I was sarcastically congratulating you on your mellow, laid back approach to life. Though if we were all of this persuasion, things like votes for women, say, probably wouldn’t exist.

ColourBlueColourPurple · 01/01/2025 18:09

ForsterMcLennan · 31/12/2024 23:11

Congratulations

Erm...thanks? What a strange comment.

Ladyingreen999 · 01/01/2025 18:04

A midwife called me that during labour. Could have punched her!

Ariana12 · 01/01/2025 17:57

Next time a response of "good boy well done" should do it!

Pieceofpurplesky · 01/01/2025 17:37

@Bellyblueboy

I have referred to adults as love etc, by mistake, just as I have the 'lesser' children. My point was that we all make mistakes when speaking. I agree with the PP and their irony comment on your postings. It's easily done to say the wrong thing and then kick yourself afterwards!

fivebyfivebuffy · 01/01/2025 13:59

It's a horrible saying
I get customers at work saying it to me when I've done my job like I'm some kind of child instead of an adult that's perfectly capable of my job
And it's never women that are saying it to me funnily

GreenWasper · 01/01/2025 13:31

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 31/12/2024 22:04

Gross??
Bit of an overreaction!

I think men who call grown women 'good girls' or similar and patronising and gross 🤷 maybe you don't but that's my gut reaction. Hardly an overreaction.
Ive had quite a bit of it in my job but I tend to respond with a sarky comment and a blank look personally

CrowleyKitten · 01/01/2025 13:14

shuggles · 31/12/2024 23:48

@Bellyblueboy I had a doctor outright call me "fat." Judging by the responses in this thread, some people would have collapsed on the floor if they heard that. But I have had a different upbringing, so my thought was "well yes, I am indeed fat, so what he's saying is correct."

that's very unprofessional.
and I'm someone that isn't offended by the term fat. I am fat. it's an accurate description. just like slim, or muscular is accurate for some people.

BUT it's unprofessional for a medical professional to call someone fat. overweight is acceptable. heavy, even. but a lot of people would be hurt by being called fat.

Thoughtsonallsorts · 01/01/2025 12:54

OP said the GP was old enough to be her father. This means he's probably of an age where the expression good girl to an adult female has absolutely no sexual connotations other than from dirty minds that think of porn on hearing the term. I've been called good girl in the past from health professionals & all it felt to me was that the person cared. Make of it as you wish. Nobody likes intimate examinations. If you go to a GP with the view it's sexual it's says more about the patients mind than the GPs who spend their lives saving lives.I genuinely hope this report gets binned.

Sharptonguedwoman · 01/01/2025 12:31

lolit · 31/12/2024 21:53

I was in a vulnerable position and taken aback.

You would have had a chaperone then? No male doctor should be doing any kind of personal exam without a female chaperone. What did they say?

Illjusthavethebreadsticks · 01/01/2025 12:18

Why not get him struck off while you're at it 🙄

TriesNotToBeCynical · 01/01/2025 12:00

I managed to work in the NHS for 42 years without ever saying "good girl" to a patient over the age of 5. It's not hard.

UnpropitiousNightmares · 01/01/2025 05:55

Highly unprofessional imo so yes, I would report them to the GMC. It's their role to ensure GP's maintain standards for good medical practice. Patronising language is not good medical practice.

ThatKhakiMoose · 01/01/2025 05:47

AppleDumplingWithCustard · 01/01/2025 01:38

Well that’s a monumental stretch.

Not really. Just think how kink went mainstream after Fifty Shades.

Shelllendyouhertoothbrush · 01/01/2025 02:39

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SheSaidHummingbird · 01/01/2025 02:38

lolit · 31/12/2024 23:23

Anyway, this thread was very helpful, even the comments telling me to get over myself helped me see how normalised this is, which is exactly why I need to put in a complaint. I need to do my small part in changing this because it is NOT OKAY.

I have written my complaint and will send it tomorrow. I will not be returning to this thread because I need to spend my NYE doing something positive instead of thinking about this.

I'm grateful that you're reporting. Only you know how uncomfortable you were made to feel. Sorry that you had to experience that.

Smineusername · 01/01/2025 02:37

AppleDumplingWithCustard · 01/01/2025 01:38

Well that’s a monumental stretch.

It's not a monumental stretch because it's basically mainstream porn and you are grossly underestimating the prevalence of regular porn usage in the male population. Pornhub is the 10th most visited website in the UK, after Instagram and before Ebay. And that's just one site, there's also Only Fans, chatrooms, webcam sites, Snapchat, Literotica etc etc etc This shit is mainstream and it's in the minds of a lot of men

Smineusername · 01/01/2025 02:20

I teach English to postgraduate level and I agree with the OP's interpretation, the language is inappropriate, and as others have noted, is the sort of language that highly educated, professional healthcare workers are explicitly trained to avoid

Imperrysmum · 01/01/2025 02:14

I think it’s unfair and unkind to report him. The dictionary definition of “girl” is “a young or relatively young woman.”

Jk987 · 01/01/2025 02:12

DontshootmyRaptors · 31/12/2024 21:46

You weren’t wearing that perfume by Carolina Herrara were you?

😂

Thoughtsonallsorts · 01/01/2025 02:09

The problem is when people go into an appointment with their GP with this mindset ie I am scrutinising every word you say. It's no wonder Doctors become less able to speak to patients generally for fear of being misinterpreted. The OPs complaint is ludicrous although as always the Doctor concerned will be sympathetic to her mental health.

Addictedtohotbaths · 01/01/2025 02:08

oakleaffy · 01/01/2025 01:41

I was sexually abused as a child, but still think someone complaining about a male GP saying ''Good girl'' is ridiculous.

Yeah so was I and I would find it triggering. It is totally unnecessary language.

beetr00 · 01/01/2025 02:00

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perhaps that would require critical thinking on your part @KilkennyCats

Thoughtsonallsorts · 01/01/2025 01:59

oakleaffy · 01/01/2025 01:33

I hate smear tests as they are so uncomfortable, and have had female nurses say ''Well done'' and ''You are doing well'' for putting up with it.

I've had male GP's do them, they do gazillions, they aren't about to lose their careers over someone like @lolit thinking that they fancy them.

No bloody wonder some GP's use chaperones- to prevent this kind of accusation.

It's absolutely dreadful.