Page 3 | To complain about a GP calling me this?

lolit · 2024-12-31T21:37:27+00:00

He called me a good girl while examining me. Should I complain or am I overreacting?

Meltedwelly · 01/01/2025 20:45

lolit · 01/01/2025 20:43

It was the tone in which he said it, it sounded pervy.

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Open your mouth darlin i'll just get me tool in, there's a good girl

Original poster

lolit · 01/01/2025 20:43

LesMisSaigon · 01/01/2025 20:42

Was it the 'girl' bit that offended you, or the 'good girl' as a whole. Last week in town I saw a former classmate, my DH asked who it was. I replied it was a girl from my class in school. This week I am going out to lunch with some girls from work....we are all aged 40 +. Sometimes I forget I am old!

It was the tone in which he said it, it sounded pervy.

OP posts:

LesMisSaigon · 01/01/2025 20:42

Was it the 'girl' bit that offended you, or the 'good girl' as a whole. Last week in town I saw a former classmate, my DH asked who it was. I replied it was a girl from my class in school. This week I am going out to lunch with some girls from work....we are all aged 40 +. Sometimes I forget I am old!

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 01/01/2025 20:41

EffortlesslyInelegant · 31/12/2024 21:51

Well I suppose if you are a 6' 9" navvy built like a brick shithouse then yeah, complain. If not just get over yourself.

😂

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 01/01/2025 20:37

Behave yourself 😂

croydon15 · 01/01/2025 20:36

DirtyFencePanel · 31/12/2024 22:39

Get a grip

This or do you spend your time being offended. You can see a female GP if not possible you can ask for a chaperone.

RosesAndHellebores · 01/01/2025 20:31

Meltedwelly · 01/01/2025 20:28

There is no such thing as "he said it in a sexual way". He said whatever he said and thats that. The surgery will get a good giggle out of this complaint.

How very unprofessional of them.

Meltedwelly · 01/01/2025 20:28

There is no such thing as "he said it in a sexual way". He said whatever he said and thats that. The surgery will get a good giggle out of this complaint.

pollymere · 01/01/2025 20:24

I'd have laughed and pointed out that I haven't been a girl for about twenty-odd years... I'm mean enough that these days, I'd leave an implication that I'm transmasc in there too...

RosesAndHellebores · 01/01/2025 20:22

I think the comment was infantilising and misogynistic. I think GPs adopt that stance too often.

Not many years ago I had a male GP introduce himself: hello Roses, I'm one of the GP Partners here, Dr Bloggs. I noted that my name was Mrs Hellebores.

Two weeks later I had a follow up appointment and asked him why he thought it was OK to use my first name when he expected me to address him with the courtesy of his title. His response "he forgot my surname between the consultancy room and reception". I responded. "Oh, did you forget your first name was Steve as well". He got very terse.

I fail to see why any individual shoukd ever be regarded with less respect than a Dr.

Wtfppl · 01/01/2025 20:17

Wtf that’s weird, gross, patronising, and patriarchal. Complain!!! Who are all these 50s house wives being good girls and saying yabu!?! We have the vote now ladies!

Fangisnotacoward · 01/01/2025 20:16

I'm normally pretty easy going, but that would make me really uncomfortable.

"Good girl" is something you say to a child or a dog when they've been well behaved and pleased their parent or master. Fuck that coming from a GP to a grown woman during an examination. 🤮

FozzieP · 01/01/2025 20:10

Move on from it… plenty more pressing things to worry about.

LeCygneNoir · 01/01/2025 20:03

Gross. Even more gross that a majority think you are being unreasonable!

Ihopeyouhavent · 01/01/2025 20:01

How typical, when the OP doesnt get the responses she wants, she then starts to drip feed that is was "sexual". Wonder why that wasnt mentioned in the first post.

MaddestGranny · 01/01/2025 19:59

Saschka: what a wonderful reply: "Good girl is what you say to a dog for bringing a stick back". Let's all commit that one to memory so we're prepared to respond instantly the next time we're humiliatingly patronised by a doctor.

MandEmummy · 01/01/2025 19:51

Sorry you've said it was during an examination, was it like a smear test or anywhere down there? I think i would feel extremely uncomfortable if that was the case.
If it was a general exam somewhere else, im not sure I'd be as affected by it.

TriesNotToBeCynical · 01/01/2025 19:46

KilkennyCats · 01/01/2025 19:22

Worryingly, I suspect not.

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If the GMC get one report of an inappropriate remark that upset a patient, then they will not pursue it beyond perhaps asking the doctor about it. But if they get twenty or a hundred reports of a particular doctor making embarrassing remarks during an intimate examination, or perhaps the patient being unsure why the examination was done, then that may be the only way this pattern of behaviour is ever revealed.

TorroFerney · 01/01/2025 19:34

RainbowSquare · 31/12/2024 21:41

Don't be so ridiculous. Bradley sometimes says that on The Chase.

And lets be honest the GP Manager wouldnt give a flying F and you'd be put on a list of obnoxious patients.

Oh well if Bradley says it. Op id have loved to have had the quick thinking To say where’s the dog? As obviously dr x you were talking to the dog that’s in here and not an adult.

Shotokan101 · 01/01/2025 19:33

Post needs more "context" really to make any judgement IMO....

KilkennyCats · 01/01/2025 19:22

GivingitToGod · 01/01/2025 19:07

You're joking right?

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Worryingly, I suspect not.

WeGoChai · 01/01/2025 19:16

lolit · 31/12/2024 23:23

Anyway, this thread was very helpful, even the comments telling me to get over myself helped me see how normalised this is, which is exactly why I need to put in a complaint. I need to do my small part in changing this because it is NOT OKAY.

I have written my complaint and will send it tomorrow. I will not be returning to this thread because I need to spend my NYE doing something positive instead of thinking about this.

I just read this to my husband who used to work in healthcare and even he said it’s unacceptable. If you are in a funeral position being examined and an older man speaks to you like this , not in a friendly but a suggestive manner then that is 100% a reason to complain! I wonder how all the other women calling this young woman out would feel if it was their daughter ?
This is exactly why Men get away with stuff like this still in this time and age ! @lolit I am sorry you have been made to feel so uncomfortable

GivingitToGod · 01/01/2025 19:07

UnpropitiousNightmares · 01/01/2025 05:55

Highly unprofessional imo so yes, I would report them to the GMC. It's their role to ensure GP's maintain standards for good medical practice. Patronising language is not good medical practice.

You're joking right?

GivingitToGod · 01/01/2025 19:05

Kimmeridge · 31/12/2024 21:39

What exactly would your complaint be??

It was patronising yes but you either address it at the time or forget about it

Completely over reacting to be considering making a complaint

Edited

SPOT ON

SwordToFlamethrower · 01/01/2025 19:01

Switch it round. A bloke getting called a "good boy" while being examined...

That's horribly rude and infantilising!

And you can complain after the fact. You were too shocked to react at the time, which is a very normal response.