Who is living life the right way?

I mean, it's not a competition. Everyone is just plodding along and doing their best, right?
If you held me at gun point and made me choose (!), I'd say A. You don't get ponies and big cars by working the equivalent of one day a week, so I'm guessing B is dependent on a man, which isn't ideal.

Out of the 2, sister B is seeing more of her dc and has less stress. It is the better option.

If she is married and splits, she would get a hopefully fair settlement. Sister B is working but she could up her hours even if it is part-time once the children are at secondary school.

You say she lives for today. How do you know her finances? A full and a part time job does allow for savings, just maybe not as much as A has.

If Sister A can only achieve this by putting her youngest child in nursery for 10 hours a day 5 days a week I feel so sorry for that child. Presumably in the week the child is only awake at home for 1 to 2 hours a day? On that basis alone Sister B has her priorities right. You can never get your children's childhood back. Money really doesn't make everything right.

I'm not sure it is a simple as right or wrong. Personally, I have never wanted a sister A situation as time with my children is very important to me and our wellbeing as a family. Conversely, I'm.not sure the sister B scenario would suit me either. I enjoy a fulfilling career that takes more than those hours. I work term time though so feel very fortunate to have all those days with my children...although it can feel relentless!! I also like to find a balance for living finncially for now and also preparing for the future. Sister B isn't really being as financially prudent as I like to be. I guess the questions for both sisters is are they happy and healthy? Are their family relationships good? Have their children hit the teen years when those evening hours are so important to connect to the children? Life is complicated and I hope they both regularly take time to consider if their choices still reflect their values and make suitable provision for the here and now in addition to the future.

Life is not a competition.

I'd just advise sister with ponies, to have a pension and her own savings/investments. Other than that, each to their on.

Sister C is having an affair with the postman and hasn't the time to be involved with the drama of Sister A or B!! 😂

Both, as each is living the way they chose. Both sound like they are having a pretty high standard of living comparibly to the majority of the worlds population. Both should be happy and if not make changes to suit. Neither are living the right or wrong way as it is an individual choice or circumstance. There are a billion ways to live a life, I would say the wrong way is to get into crime or be a serial killer or some other horrible affairs. But if you are generally a good person and try hard then there is no right or wrong way to live your life.

I was more of an A than a B, through necessity rather than choice (and definitely nowhere near as well-off!), but neither sound exactly balanced. If you added them both up and divided by two you'd get two well-balanced, hard-working, attentive parents.

I'll eat my hat if the OP isn't either A or a friend of A.

For me neither is right (or necessarily wrong) but a balance between living in the now and planning for the future is ideal.

Sister A needs to work out if sacrificing the now for the future is worth it and maybe easing off a little might be better

Sister B - what is she going to do when her kids move in and grow up what is her future going to be

there is a balance and neither have it for me

Is Sister A a lawyer? She sounds like one.

There is no right and wrong. Modelling a strong work ethic is a good thing.

However they both opted for 3 kids, which is a lot by today's standards. They both seem to be doing their best and what is right for them. Both quite privileged.

Comparison is the thief of joy.

What's Sister C up to? 🤣

Why does Sister A have to work so many hours? What's the back story?

If sister A is doing all these horrendous hours to buy properties to rent out she will end up the richest corpse in the graveyard. Not much point to that.

Love this 🙏

But as other pp have said before: what kind of pointless question is this? We do what we can with what we're given.

@MrsTerryPratchett I like the sound of Applejack, my kind of pony. I have a DS so my knowledge of The Ponies is meagre.

This is all a bit childish. Leave people to live their own lives for better or for worse.

Are they both happy? If so, the they’re both doing life right.
This is one of those things that is entirely subjective.

I'm not inviting a discussion of the view of being a landlord. I was commenting how you are - and it's definitely not because you're just interested...it's because you have a particularly view that is not consistent with someone else - so as I said it will result in a fight...aways funny to watch. Hardly anyone ever changes their mind on here. Great entertainment however.

She right though- spending ordinary everyday time with your children is hugely valuable- actually being around and present rather than always working.

As sister B seems to have an upper crust set up already while working smaller part time hours I would say Sister B has the 'better deal' right now. I don't know about 'the right way' but Sister B has more balance and time for kids which is important. Sorry if you are Sister A in this post.

Why? You either own a property or rent a property. ( Through a private landlord or council or housing trust )
I don't get why on mumsnet being a landlord is such a sin.

Are they both happy? Then they’re both doing it right.

I’m more like sister A in the fact that I work full time with 3 kids. Wouldn’t be a landlord though.

So I’d say sister A just because I’d never want to be in sister B’s position of relying on a man financially.

with respect, as much as I agree that what the sisters do is nobody's business, I can't think of anything worst than "pottering around the house". It's mindlessly boring to me.

Fine for kids to do that in their bedroom after diner when parents have a bit of time in the evening, but no way is it something I would encourage from 3pm straight after school. Poor kids are missing out on so much!

Ha ha what a funny way of looking at it - parents that potter round the house and watch TV with them?! 😂 Yes, terrible parents working to better their living conditions / providing them with extracurricular experiences… I actually agree that children don’t need extravagance, what they want is attention and love from their parents - it sounds as though both sisters are trying their absolute best, possibly even too hard really on both sides, and could loosen up a little. The children aren’t crying out for parents lolloping round the house watching more Tv though.