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AIBU?

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Original poster

To hate that DGD has her ears pierced

163 replies

OhSoYouAreFancy · 30/12/2024 20:07

DGD is 3, she was born and until this summer raised abroad, DD got her ears pierced when she was weeks old, this is common practice there.
I hate it though, I think it looks so cheap and trashy!! DGD clearly couldn't consent and DD spends ridiculous amounts (of our money as we support her right now) on solid gold earrings for her.
I feel like when people realise they judge and think it looks downmarket and cheap.

AIBU to hate it?

OP posts:
LetsNCagain · 30/12/2024 20:12

It's cultural. It's like (sorry, I'm preparing to be flamed) say, infant circumcision - some cultures think it's awful and some think it's normal.

I personally find any kind of tattoos or piercings, even on adults, a bit strange and akin to self-harm. But I respect that it's culturally normal in lots of cultures, as is circumcision. So I keep my thoughts to myself (IRL)

Spidey66 · 30/12/2024 20:12

Not a parent but I hate seeing babies and small children with pierced ears. OK most people have them done but I think it should be when they're able to consent to it and manage the aftercare themselves.

I imagine it's painful for them, and think it's too easy to cause them further pain, injury or illness by pulling at them.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 30/12/2024 20:12

You can hate it. I hate it too. But you can't comment unless you're asked outright for your opinion. You're not her mum so you don't get to make those decisions.

Im curious as to how far this support goes that you say you are giving her? That's a whole different issue, if she's taking a piss with the money.

Original poster
OhSoYouAreFancy · 30/12/2024 20:11

Sceptical123 · 30/12/2024 20:09

DD got her ears pierced when she was weeks old?

Sorry I meant DGD, DD was 11 when she got hers done.

OP posts:
Sceptical123 · 30/12/2024 20:11

Sceptical123 · 30/12/2024 20:09

DD got her ears pierced when she was weeks old?

Ohhhh you mean your daughter got her daughter’s ears pierced at weeks old - it read like you were talking about a daughter in law who was a baby when she had hers done etc, right

Original poster
OhSoYouAreFancy · 30/12/2024 20:11

DD thinks its fine and "part of her culture" but DD doesn't participate in any part of that culture anymore and it's not a culture where women are respected particularly well and DD knows that better than most. Feels odd that she is okay with that part but rejects everything else.

OP posts:
MontyNojangles · 30/12/2024 20:10

I judge you for this thread.
It's not your child so it's not important whether you think it's cheap or not.

Sceptical123 · 30/12/2024 20:09

DD got her ears pierced when she was weeks old?

SummaLuvin · 30/12/2024 20:09

I don't particularly like piercings on young children, as you say - they can't consent, and it will cause them discomfort, and has no benefit. But using words like 'trashy', 'cheap' and 'downmarket' about your 3yo granddaughter is grim AF, so maybe you should look at yourself before judging others....

SchoolDilemma17 · 30/12/2024 20:09

yeah agree with you. Looks tacky and is a chocking risk for small kids.
Why do you support her? Time for her to support herself if she has money for child earrings.

bakewellbride · 30/12/2024 20:08

Yanbu I hate it too. No piercings for my dd until ten minimum. She's nearly 3 now and I find the thought of it unthinkable

BarbaraHoward · 30/12/2024 20:08

I don't like pierced ears on kids that age, so I'm with you on that. But she's not your DD, and you don't get a vote so you kinda need to cop on and snap out of it before her parents realise your judgement.

woodenbatandball · 30/12/2024 20:08

I hate it too! Also think why out small children through the pain of getting their ears pierced when they are so young.

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