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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how much you’d expect a babysitter to cost on NYE

519 replies

ThatMauveRaven · 30/12/2024 18:15

20yo DD has been asked (last minute) to babysit her manager’s two young children tomorrow night. They’ve offered her £60 in cash to be there from 8pm-1am. The two kids will most likely be asleep in bed, so she won’t exactly have to do much work but I still think that this is quite stingey considering it’s New Years Eve!

Thoughts?

YABU - £60 is enough
YANBU - I’d expect to pay more

OP posts:
LarkinAboot · 31/12/2024 00:14

"Babysitting counts as work and therefore minimum wage applies whether you like it or not. Thankfully the majority of us have a bit of politeness and respect for others and don’t take advantage of young babysitters by paying them unfairly to get cheap childcare. Unfortunately you seem to be in the minority."

Does she have an up to date enhanced DBS and up to date paediatric first aid certificate & safeguarding qualification? Insurance?

Or do you get what you pay for? IMO you can't skimp on those very important things and then expect similar rates to those that have them.

Trendyname · 31/12/2024 00:13

PokerFriedDips · 30/12/2024 23:23

If the manager genuinely thinks that anyone would be happy to be enriched by the sum of £60 in exchange for missing NYE celebrations and sitting on a sofa with babymonitor link to kids upstairs, then they will be happy to keep their £60 and stay at home themselves.

If that wouldn't make them happy then the amount being offered is too low.

The value of any service is what a willing buyer will pay to a willing seller. If the potential seller won't accept what the prospective buyer is prepared to pay then the buyer cannot afford it. That's ok, there's no obligation on either side for the sale to happen.

I agree with this. 60 is exploitation.

WearyAuldWumman · 31/12/2024 00:13

shuggles · 30/12/2024 23:39

@PurpleThistle7 That is ridiculous. We paid £15/hour on a normal night. Besides which it is super inappropriate for a manager to ask this of an employee unless there's a personal relationship of some sort? Or she works in childcare? I think she's being put in an awful position here.

Sorry, it's inappropriate for a manager to ask an employee to cover a shift...?

I swear that mumsnet lives in a different universe sometimes. Oh how I wish the most "inappropriate" thing a manager ever asked me to do was... cover a shift... which actually is not inappropriate at all.

What made you think that the OP's daughter was merely being asked to cover a shift?

Trendyname · 30/12/2024 23:59

shuggles · 30/12/2024 19:39

Same. But bear in mind that this is mumsnet after all, where a lot of people earn £60 an hour for doing lazy office jobs.

Show quote history

It's not about lazy jobs. It is about awkward timing, plus needing 20 mins car drive one way.

Would you say a security man should be paid peanuts because he does not do much 'work'?

Original poster
ThatMauveRaven · 30/12/2024 23:47

shuggles · 30/12/2024 23:39

@PurpleThistle7 That is ridiculous. We paid £15/hour on a normal night. Besides which it is super inappropriate for a manager to ask this of an employee unless there's a personal relationship of some sort? Or she works in childcare? I think she's being put in an awful position here.

Sorry, it's inappropriate for a manager to ask an employee to cover a shift...?

I swear that mumsnet lives in a different universe sometimes. Oh how I wish the most "inappropriate" thing a manager ever asked me to do was... cover a shift... which actually is not inappropriate at all.

Except she’s not ‘covering a shift’ and it’s nothing to do with her job. He’s asking her for a personal babysitting favour (and isn’t willing to pay for it)

OP posts:
Kittiwakeup · 30/12/2024 23:46

£100 minimum. That is stingy.

PyongyangKipperbang · 30/12/2024 23:46

shuggles · 30/12/2024 23:39

@PurpleThistle7 That is ridiculous. We paid £15/hour on a normal night. Besides which it is super inappropriate for a manager to ask this of an employee unless there's a personal relationship of some sort? Or she works in childcare? I think she's being put in an awful position here.

Sorry, it's inappropriate for a manager to ask an employee to cover a shift...?

I swear that mumsnet lives in a different universe sometimes. Oh how I wish the most "inappropriate" thing a manager ever asked me to do was... cover a shift... which actually is not inappropriate at all.

She isnt being asked to cover a shift!! She is being asked to drive to the managers home, babysit his "not the easiest boys" young sons then drive herself home in the early house of NYD and for that be paid a pittance.

This person is a manager at her place of work, it is entirely inappropriate.

ATuinTheGreat · 30/12/2024 23:43

shuggles · 30/12/2024 23:39

@PurpleThistle7 That is ridiculous. We paid £15/hour on a normal night. Besides which it is super inappropriate for a manager to ask this of an employee unless there's a personal relationship of some sort? Or she works in childcare? I think she's being put in an awful position here.

Sorry, it's inappropriate for a manager to ask an employee to cover a shift...?

I swear that mumsnet lives in a different universe sometimes. Oh how I wish the most "inappropriate" thing a manager ever asked me to do was... cover a shift... which actually is not inappropriate at all.

It’s not “covering a shift” - babysitting is not her job and the manager does not employ her to babysit and does not employ her to work at his house at night. It’s totally separate from her job, but she is being put in a difficult position by her employer asking her to do this.

shuggles · 30/12/2024 23:39

@PurpleThistle7 That is ridiculous. We paid £15/hour on a normal night. Besides which it is super inappropriate for a manager to ask this of an employee unless there's a personal relationship of some sort? Or she works in childcare? I think she's being put in an awful position here.

Sorry, it's inappropriate for a manager to ask an employee to cover a shift...?

I swear that mumsnet lives in a different universe sometimes. Oh how I wish the most "inappropriate" thing a manager ever asked me to do was... cover a shift... which actually is not inappropriate at all.

PyongyangKipperbang · 30/12/2024 23:30

Sounds like she needs to find another job and not just because of the babysitting CFery

thescandalwascontained · 30/12/2024 23:26

I hope she stands firm. £100 is perfectly reasonable for NYE, especially on such short notice.

MrsSkylerWhite · 30/12/2024 23:23

£100 plus dinner and a lift/taxi home.

PokerFriedDips · 30/12/2024 23:23

If the manager genuinely thinks that anyone would be happy to be enriched by the sum of £60 in exchange for missing NYE celebrations and sitting on a sofa with babymonitor link to kids upstairs, then they will be happy to keep their £60 and stay at home themselves.

If that wouldn't make them happy then the amount being offered is too low.

The value of any service is what a willing buyer will pay to a willing seller. If the potential seller won't accept what the prospective buyer is prepared to pay then the buyer cannot afford it. That's ok, there's no obligation on either side for the sale to happen.

PennyApril54 · 30/12/2024 23:21

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 30/12/2024 23:19

Yes I don’t think she should do it now even if he does up his offer. I would say I was sticking to my original plans in her shoes (even if I didn’t actually have any plans).

This. Let's get it wrapped up tonight so they can't accuse her of pulling out at the last min tomorrow.

Bumcake · 30/12/2024 23:21

£60 is stingy, I’m glad she asked for more. I hope he can’t get anyone to do it for £85.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 30/12/2024 23:19

Yes I don’t think she should do it now even if he does up his offer. I would say I was sticking to my original plans in her shoes (even if I didn’t actually have any plans).

TwinklyStarlight · 30/12/2024 23:19

ThatMauveRaven · 30/12/2024 23:00

Neither! It’s just a small (and rather unprofessional…) family business. He has since put the offer of £60 for the night into the staff group chat - they’ve all left him on read 🤣

Show quote history

What did your daughter reply to the £85?

CowTown · 30/12/2024 23:06

ThatMauveRaven · 30/12/2024 23:00

Neither! It’s just a small (and rather unprofessional…) family business. He has since put the offer of £60 for the night into the staff group chat - they’ve all left him on read 🤣

Show quote history

Quelle surprise.

MumChp · 30/12/2024 23:04

ThatMauveRaven · 30/12/2024 21:47

He has messaged back to her offering £85 - CF!

"No, thank you. Have a great night! xxx.".

Original poster
ThatMauveRaven · 30/12/2024 23:00

PurpleThistle7 · 30/12/2024 22:51

That is ridiculous. We paid £15/hour on a normal night. Besides which it is super inappropriate for a manager to ask this of an employee unless there's a personal relationship of some sort? Or she works in childcare? I think she's being put in an awful position here.

Neither! It’s just a small (and rather unprofessional…) family business. He has since put the offer of £60 for the night into the staff group chat - they’ve all left him on read 🤣

OP posts:
GravyBoatWars · 30/12/2024 22:57

I hope she feels comfortable telling this CF no. Trying to low-ball and haggle with a subordinate is asshole behavior from the manager.

Your DD's time has value, including her down time. Parents of young children in particular (including those on this thread) should know that.

fashionqueen0123 · 30/12/2024 22:57

ThatMauveRaven · 30/12/2024 21:47

He has messaged back to her offering £85 - CF!

What a joke. I’d call his bluff and say sorry no.

PokerFriedDips · 30/12/2024 22:55

ThatMauveRaven · 30/12/2024 21:47

He has messaged back to her offering £85 - CF!

Definitely CF.
"Sorry, I have plans" is all she need to say now. She has said what she'd accept (perfectly reasonable amount) and they aren't willing to pay that so no deal. I don't think she should agree now even if they do up their offer - they will probably do some kind of bait-and-switch trick as they have demonstrated they don't value the sacrifice they are asking of her.

Ellie1015 · 30/12/2024 22:55

I would definitely say no after him being so cheeky! Yes please or no thanks were his only options.

KnittyNell · 30/12/2024 22:53

At least £100 and extra for after midnight.