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AIBU?

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Original poster

Anyone else hate the expectation to shave down there?

683 replies

BearDownThere · 29/12/2024 21:40

Is anyone else fed up of the expectation/strong preference for going completely shave pubic hair? I’m female and have only had male partners, but prepared to believe women have this expectation too if others have experienced it. I mean each to their own, but personally I find it feels child-like. Has anyone managed to find a compromise with their partner on this?

YABU- It’s nice to do things for your partner

YANBU-my hair my choice

OP posts:
GetyourheadoutoftheovenIris · 29/12/2024 22:42

I have regular waxes. I don’t like pubic hair on me. I’m mid 40s and have never had anyone tell me that it’s ’child like’ because I don’t sleep for stupid twats

DH is very hairy and I love it on him but if he got rid of everything that’s fine too.

I think that it’s really personal though. I like to have a full wax because I like it. I feel cleaner, no stragglers peeking out of my bikini bottoms and no sweaty bush.

BIossomtoes · 29/12/2024 22:40

I got rid of mine once and could feel every thread in my knickers. Awful. Never again.

I gather that very young women now are rejecting depilation entirely and leave all their body hair alone. Good for them, I wish my generation had too.

ShortyShorts · 29/12/2024 22:40

I'm not a fan of shaving so I simply don't do it.

I do however think it's strange that people always bring 'pre-pubescencey' into these threads.

I'm 55, if I shaved my fanny and any child's pubic area even remotely resembled mine after I've had 3 vaginal births, I'd be phoning the poor kid an ambulance and ringing ahead to the hospital!

DissidentDaughter · 29/12/2024 22:40

There’s a difference between personal preference and an imposed expectation. Just as a quick tidy-up is not the same as the (most likely) time-consuming, physically punishing, hair-free sex doll look.

As for the back, sack, crack nonsense… 😖

ChishiyaBat · 29/12/2024 22:39

I'm not shaving my bush for anyone. Don't like my hair then you aren't deserving of my time.

RareNewt · 29/12/2024 22:39

No expectations, I shave, trim and leave it to grow. My hubby loves it all

TheJackalsJackal · 29/12/2024 22:38

My DH doesn’t like it smooth like a baby, just neatly trimmed. Suits me. I’ve tried a bit of everything but agree with his choice thankfully. That said he’s happy to just get near it like most men so do what you like! As we all should.

Createausername1970 · 29/12/2024 22:38

Since being in my late 50s, it has gravitated from down there and now sprouts out of my chin.

Thereislightattheendofthetunnel · 29/12/2024 22:38

FknOmniShambles · 29/12/2024 21:45

Definitely not U. I've had sexual partners who bordered on disgust at seeing I had hair down there - madness!
Luckily, DH and I literally have no preference how each other maintains their public hair.

I love the public hair bit 😉

12purplepencils · 29/12/2024 22:37

I dated someone briefly who had a “strong preference” for it and stated as such and it gave me the ick.

EllieRosesMammy · 29/12/2024 22:37

I only felt pressure to do that when I was younger. I'm married now and almost 30, if I want to shave I'll shave, but my husband couldn't care less whether I do or not 😅

I think mature men (and women) are happy with anything, shaven or unshaven 🤷🏻‍♀️

Paradisegained · 29/12/2024 22:37

DP has never mentioned it. Neither has any other partner. Mine is long and thick and I trim it slightly. No partner has ever wanted it removed. It only gets removed in porn for the camera look but we don’t do porn and so natural all the way here.

Samandytimlucypeterolivia · 29/12/2024 22:37

I only shave it if it’s really irritating, partner don’t have an issue with it, never has. Been together for 21 years.

borntoblossom · 29/12/2024 22:37

Early 40s and I've had a few men comment in the past that I've had too much hair. Shaving is a bloody nightmare, and I can't just give it a trim as that turns it into a hideous prickly thing, I'd rather keep it all there nice and soft, though occasionally will have a full wax. There's no in between for me.

JM88Jen · 29/12/2024 22:36

Your bush, your choice!

MyOtherCarisAVauxhallZafira · 29/12/2024 22:35

Isn't this quite outdated now? I thought the Hollywood was a thing of the past. Are you or your partners quite young?
I trim with an electric trimmer, and wax my bikini line (I swim regularly and would have a thigh beard otherwise). DH couldn't give a shiny shit, I know he does think it's weird and a bit suspect that some men seemingly prefer no signs of puberty but he works with sex offenders so might have a different perspective than some men.

AngelicKaty · 29/12/2024 22:35

pinkstripeycat · 29/12/2024 21:55

I get rid of as much as I want and always have done. Small triangle. Had a conversation with DH once and he said complete removal would be gross as he’d imagine it to be too child like. He’d never dated anyone who got rid of the lot.

We are in our early 50s and I’m not sure it was ever a thing for anyone if our ages growing up to get rid of the lot. It does make me think men who like the lot removing are creepy as I think it’s child like aswell

"It does make me think men who like the lot removing are creepy as I think it’s child like as well." Yep, totally agree with this - creepy AF.

christmaslatte · 29/12/2024 22:35

Only ever shaved it once, for fun.

OMFG the prickles when it was growing back, never again!

I'm quite happy with my bush. Never had a complaint yet.

MrsSkylerWhite · 29/12/2024 22:33

Eh? Been married for 35 years. Can honestly say it’s never been mentioned.

leia24 · 29/12/2024 22:33

Ablondiebutagoody · 29/12/2024 22:23

Providing the patriarchy also shave their balls, I'm happy to scab.

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Wish I could laugh react on the app 🤣

handsdownthebest · 29/12/2024 22:31

My body my choice. I prefer to shave.

Radionowhere · 29/12/2024 22:31

No compromise needed. Been with DH a long time. Long before people were shaving all there pubes off. Neat and tidy, absolutely, all gone? No way.

Dery · 29/12/2024 22:30

I don’t remove my pubic hair. That said, I’m well into middle age as is my DH and it’s not an expectation.

Mischance · 29/12/2024 22:30

There is no pressure to shave your pubes. None at all. Your body, you do what YOU like.

I find the whole idea has paedophile undertones and do not like the idea at all.

MuchTooTired · 29/12/2024 22:30

I shave mine completely, purely my choice. I am married, but even when sex is completely off the table I keep it bald because that’s my preference!

I’ve been shaving it since I discovered that it was a thing I could do in my late teens 20 years ago.