Drippy female/male singing in adverts

I try to avoid adverts these days but I’m so with you on dramatic whispering scenes in Films and TV programmes. Drives me mad. Does nobody in the editing suite check whether you can understand what the actors are saying? My DD just has the subtitles on permanently mainly for this reason.

Totally agree.

Luckily I don't see many ads these days. I did have the misfortune to have a Spotify playlist shared with me called indie Xmas which seemed to have endless whining depressing cover crap by Phoebe Bridgers and the like. Nope. Not for me.

Is Cadburys world still as depressing as it was when I was a kid? (about 20 years ago)

We went and all I remember it being was a boring tour, with 1 ride and a small bag of chocolate at the end 🙄

This gives the rage. It started with that John Lewis advert and Lily Allen ruining a perfectly good Keane song and don’t get me started on wherever you will go being murdered.

To be fair the actor in this is Joel Montague, very successful west end actor and currently in Hamilton. I don’t think it will do any harm and he will be playing it as directed!!

I find the Clive Anderson radio 4 programme, Loose Ends, always seems to feature a female singer singing drippily in the guise of 'new artist'. Not sure if he is trying to emulate the late, great John Peel, but his chosen artists are awful! Tuneless, quivering, nothingness.

I absolutely LOATHE the Amazon advert. I change the lyrics every time it comes on: what Amazon needs now / is unions and fair pay.

And that bloody Jess Glynne hold my hand song needs to fuck off and get in the bin already. She sounds like a screeching sheep every time she strains for a high note.

It's Mariella Frostrup that does the Fevertree radio ads .

This makes my very even-tempered DH desperately search for the remote to “mute the prick”

I’m right with you. I now watch most programmes with subtitles because I just can’t follow plots trying to work out what the actors are saying. I would have to put the volume up so high, my husband’s and neighbour’s ears would bleed. And is there a person alive who can understand a thing Sarah Lancashire says without cranking the volume up? Jesus, I sound sooo old!

‘Vulnerable sleeve’ 😂

World-weary vocals, weakly delivered by some random 22-year old.

@DissidentDaughter I imagine all the singers of these mournful fucked Jo songs are all wearing a 'vulnerable sleeve' while wheezing their way through a song.

See image for 'vulnerable sleeve'

That awful lost without you where the man collects his dog argghhhh !

Oh yep, poor enunciation, adopting odd accents, vocal fry, breathy, drippy, miserable singing of what used to be great tunes.

Ugh. Fuck the fuck off with it!

😂 … as flaccid as the half-baked Brit take on ‘hygge’ and a million miles wide of the mark.

Hateful, both. And should be banned without further ado.

YES! I call it whiny music. I’m in Canada so looked up the Barclaycard ad and it’s the same as my gripe. I can’t find the ad to link but one here uses the song “the more we get together” but in that horrible slow, whiny voice so it’s “the more we get together…….the happier……..the happier…….we will be”

The trend of the breathy chanteuse murdering decent songs started about 10 years ago and it's bloody awful.

I've noticed recently they've now all put on Scandinavian accents too.

Every year I get angry at the impending douchebags that are going to take a great song, slow it down and just ruin it, they should be polite enough to offer the song some lipstick, so at least the song will look pretty when they FUCK IT!

Sorry il stay calm, its my issue, what’s wrong with a good old advert like trio, um bongo or Kelloggs all bran 🎶there tasty, tasty, very very tasty, there very tasty🎶

I know it’s not the same, but every Christmas there is a radio advert for fever tree that gives me the rage, Jenny Eclair reading a script that doesn’t quite rhyme, so she sort of forces it to in her irritating hung over 60 a day voice, sorry I’m sure she’s very lovely, it’s just the words!

I remember Mr Bean jumping out of his skin at that advert!

The anodyne, studied, faux-folk vocals really grind my gears. Utter sh*te.

Yes! Thank you! Finally someone has mentioned adverts with non-singers singing badly! I cannot stand those ones. I also can’t stand choirs of people who can’t sing but that’s another discussion.

Anyone else who was a teen in the 80s remember the 'WOOOOAH, BODYFO-ORM!' ads 😂

I think sanpro ads had only just become a thing, that one certainly set the genre rolling with a flourish 😂

They dont even get him a full suit!
Really weird ''here sing for us"
At the end does he just continue sweeping?

Don’t get me started on the Amazon one where they buy the janitor a tuxedo jacket (on Amazon?! What??) so that he can get on stage and warble one line of what the world needs now is love. 🤮