AIBU unreasonable OH being ridiculous

I’d have told him to sod off!

"He said it really hurt. Is that even possible?"
Yes it does really hurt.
I have a few different issues with my eyes which flare up at different times.
When they have been at their worse a light that isn't very bright can feeling like my eyes are being stabbed with needles.
On a good day when my eyes feel completely fine having a light shone towards them still hurts.
I have also had my mother and my ex partner physically hurt me for years in one off accidents.
Anytime I said "ow" or reacted in anyway it would then lead to arguments. They both said if they hurt me accidentally then I am supposed to just take it and not mention it.
I put up with it for years (havent spoken to my mother in 12 years now).
If you accidentally hurt someone just apologise so they know you didn't mean it.
Don't expect someone to put up with you hurting them because you did it accidentally.
Just say, sorry it was an accident. No need to cause an argument about it.

I'm working with my son that we need to say sorry if we accidentally hurt someone and it's not an admission of blame but rather an acknowledgment that you didn't mean to do it.

It's not nice to make excuses or blame /or accuse the person you hurt of over reacting .

He's only 5 he will get there.

Me too and my DH occasionally accidentally shines his headtorch in my face when he comes indoors forgetting it's still on. But he's not doing it deliberately, he apologises, and I don't try to make him feel bad. Because I'm not a dick.

I’m just bemused by how Mumsnet threads travel sometimes. I have some light sensitivity. I really struggle in some circumstances. Head torches, LED torches etc can be really painful and affect also vision for some time.

A normal phone torch in daylight in a light room. Annoying. A surprise. Definitely yes. Painful to the levels stated above… I’m clearly living on another planet.

He sounds like a dick

Flashing a light in my eyes is a sure way to start a migraine, even the light from a phone. I don't find that amusing. Yes, it does hurt.

All those laser pens you’ve stared at lol

Sounds like it’s ran its course though op.

Is it really easier having him in the house.

Why did you need a torch to build a Lego anyway 😅

Just wondering are you in a tent? I normally build mine on the dining table under a bright light.

FFS you are both being babies. Yes, having a torch shone in your eyes is uncomfortable but he might have overreacted a little due to feeling unwell.

However you are maasively overreacting by acting like him making one comment is ruining your day. If he was still griping about it hours later, sure, he’d be being ridiculous but it seems like he said one thing at the time and hours later you’re still stewing on it.

You clearly hate him so just wrap things up.

That’s total bullshit.

Ugh he sounds like such a wet wipe. Too anxious to go and do his own returns but believes he’s an “alpha”? Next…

I use mine regularly and they can hurt when you’re not expecting to be zapped directly.

The only person who over-reacted is the OP.

She shines a torch in his eyes (which does hurt, especially through eyeglasses)

He says ‘you shone your torch in my eyes’ took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. All a very normal reaction.

OP’s response instead of saying oops sorry was “it was a complete accident and that it wasn’t likely to happen again but honestly he’s made me feel completely crap and useless.” !! (In front of their kid)

Flying off the handle. So he is now supposed to apologise for her shining her torch in his eyes?

In the rest of the posts it’s clear she resents her DH and feels mostly contempt for him. When things get this bad, it doesn’t look good for the future of the relationship or the children.

I’ve had some experience of trying to use an iPhone torch recently and they are shit! Literally no chance it caused him discomfort if he’s a normal person.

This whole thread is a bit weird. So obviously a lot of back story but you are unwilling to share, so we are going to debate how bright phone lights are all evening? What are you looking for OP? Help with your relationship issues? Validation he was over reacting? Advice on how best to build Lego…?

It really isn’t.

Ps.. He sounds utterly pathetic and I’d be telling him so too. Ick!!

The light on the remote control is brighter than the torches on most phones. He’s being an arse.

From only knowing you,from what you've written, I'd say he had a slight overreaction to the situation at the time and you've overreacted to that reaction. If my dh said that to me, it wouldn't make me feel "crap and worthless"....I'd just think to myself "yeah, whatever 😂" and go about my day. Of course I realise we're all different, I just wouldn't give it another thought. Unless it was another 100th dig of the day and things weren't going well anyway??

But you can’t judge someone else’s pain threshold. A phone torch light actually hurts my eyes and gives me stars for a few minutes if it catches my eyes

You sound contemptuous of your dh and don't believe him so it's unlikely the relationship will survive much longer.