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Original poster

Anyone else feel like they don't have a purpose in life?

36 replies

overthinkersanonnymus · 29/12/2024 16:06

I'm increasingly feeling lost in my own life. Maybe it's the weather, I don't know.

It's just me and DP in the house, no children. I feel like all I do is work, shop and clean. We do split the cores, so it's not all me doing everything, but they are my 3 things. Everyday.

I don't particularly enjoy my job and I'm scared to retain (again!). I'm 38 with no real ties, so I should be living rather than just existing.

The drudgery is really getting to me. Maybe I need a dog.....

OP posts:
Eyeballpaula · 29/12/2024 16:59

My job is very purposeful and satisfying and i have much wanted children, however I can identify with the work, shop and clean - even more so since having kids as there is so much more shopping & cleaning to do!! The job can also be incredibly draining and has a high rate of burnout. However at 38, if you have a job you are interest in, it's not too late to retrain.

The things to me that add interest to life are things like art, theatre and travel. For others it hobbies, sports, going out etc.

You have to find what works for you though. I've heard others talk of looking back into your childhood interests for inspiration.

101Nutella · 29/12/2024 16:36

YANBU - I think every few years your habits/friends/interests can naturally drift and you have to make a concerted effort to put things in the diary and have things to look forward to , a chance to experience new things. Doesn’t have to be expensive but like attending a class you wouldn’t usually. Learning a new skill- not to be good at t, just for interest.

i think charity work or helping others /joining a community gives a sense of purpose or working towards something. I felt like you but I felt that I had room for something extra in my life. Already had a pet so didn’t mind looking after others. Was undecided about kids.

anyway decided to have a kid and that feeling of being a bit aimless / ?purpose has gone. I feel content in a way I didn’t know I was missing at all. But before this I explored hobbies/shaking up life and career just o check I wasn’t being hasty.

so maybe this feeling is just a marker to tell u to shake things up a bit. And do son living outside of house drudgery.

Moonlightstars · 29/12/2024 16:23

I retrained to work in a charitable role. I now work helping people improve their neighbourhoods. I find it really satisfying. Everyone I work with are trying to make the world a better place to be. So it's a positive environment with positive outcomes.
I have previously worked in corporate bollocks and retail. All which are about making money and I felt like my life was meaningless.
I started this role in my early 40s best thing I ever did. It made me realise how many bastards work in corporate positions and the rubbish I had put up with.
Surround yourself with positive people it rubs off!

JHound · 29/12/2024 16:20

I don’t have a purpose in life, never have done and no idea how I would find one. I just accept that not everybody does and for some of us, we just take life as a day by day activity.

Most people I know who see a clear purpose in their life have kids and their kids are their purpose. I don’t meet many people who can list a purpose outside of kids.

cartagenagina · 29/12/2024 16:19

Would it be helpful to write down a list of ways in which you would like your life to be different? Honestly and brutally, for your eyes only.

Catza · 29/12/2024 16:19

Retrain. What's there to be afraid of? Time is passing whether you take an opportunity to learn something new or not. I changed my career completely at 38 - best thing ever. Fill your days with things you love. I am sure there are plenty of things happening locally you can engage with - evening classes, walking groups, volunteering ..

TwinkleLights24 · 29/12/2024 16:17

I wouldn’t get a dog. It’s one more chore and will tie you down even more.

MyPithyPoster · 29/12/2024 16:17

overthinkersanonnymus · 29/12/2024 16:06

I'm increasingly feeling lost in my own life. Maybe it's the weather, I don't know.

It's just me and DP in the house, no children. I feel like all I do is work, shop and clean. We do split the cores, so it's not all me doing everything, but they are my 3 things. Everyday.

I don't particularly enjoy my job and I'm scared to retain (again!). I'm 38 with no real ties, so I should be living rather than just existing.

The drudgery is really getting to me. Maybe I need a dog.....

You can retrain as many times as you feel the need to. I’ve had two separate careers.
One I enjoyed much more than the other, but it’s absolutely fine. You just do what you need to do to find fulfilment in this life.
I wouldn’t recommend getting a dog unless you really enjoy cleaning

stripeystripedstripes · 29/12/2024 16:15

Holidays? Hobbies? Pets?

DustyLee123 · 29/12/2024 16:13

Do you have a holiday booked? You need something to look forward to.

loropianalover · 29/12/2024 16:13

I feel the same sometimes but then at the same time don’t think I really believe that everyone can have a ‘purpose’. I’m not going to get a meaningful job or save lives or make a positive impact anywhere, it’s just not me. I do have to make an effort not to overthink it really or you do start to wonder…

I’m similar to you with DP, no kids. Sometimes going to work and doing chores at home just feels like an endless loop. I try to think about things I enjoy and make an active effort to do them. Also never the recommendation anyone wants to hear, but walking/fresh air does help! I always feel better after a walk so try to go every day. I unfortunately don’t have an answer to the ‘bigger’ questions of life!