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Original poster

To ask what skills you think your children need to adult ?

42 replies

adultingskills · 29/12/2024 11:50

At a dinner party last night and the conversation turned to this and I thought it was v interesting!

What do you want your kids to know how to do?
Some answers were:
Drive
Swim
Cook
Mix cocktails

What else?

OP posts:
Ladybyrd · 29/12/2024 12:49

@Miley1967 A bit like my kids and vegetables then. One would choose fruit and veg over crisps and chocolates every time, the other it's a struggle getting them to eat anything healthy. Polar opposites, yet both treated the same. Just goes to show.

LogicalImpossibility · 29/12/2024 12:44

As well as practical stuff like cooking, driving, swimming and working a washing machine, I think it’s important to encourage them to know how to find a solution.

So maybe they don’t know how to change a tyre, or open a bank account, but is ok because they do know how to find trustworthy information on how to do it. That definitely includes talking to strangers (eg asking for help at a bank), as well as googling.

Ukholidaysaregreat · 29/12/2024 12:43

Great thread idea. I think this should be promoted to all parents.

foreverbasil · 29/12/2024 12:42

Soft skills, being able to work with others cooperatively. Knowing how to start a conversation and how to end one.
Knowing what to do in an unfamiliar situation.
Basic problem solving.
Vastly underrated but so many young people I work with struggle with this and need strategies.

ShimmySkirt · 29/12/2024 12:30

I'm not fussed about learning to drive because we live near good transport links but my essential adult skills are

Basic maths
Know how to swim even a doggy paddle!
Streetwise, knows what to do in an emergency, not too trusting of people
Time management
Learning to say no
Learning to use a cooker safely snd operate a washing machine. Knowing how to do basic cleaning, knowing how to do basic self hygiene... yes some parents neglect to teach this. Thankfully there is online conteng teaching everything these days.

Miley1967 · 29/12/2024 12:11

Ladybyrd · 29/12/2024 12:04

Financial. It's hugely undertaught but can make all the difference in their life trajectory. My parents actively encouraged me to get in debt - my dad even told me to lie about my salary to get lower interest rates. Both my brother and I have spent a lifetime in debt and neither of us are homeowners. I'll do whatever it takes not to pass that on.

Yes I've tried to instill this in my now young adult kids. However one is still crazily bad with money ( gambling etc) and one is ultra tight ! They need to find a happy medium !

Echobelly · 29/12/2024 12:10

Use public transport, including unfamiliar systems
Be able to walk between places when that's the quickest way
Being able to talk - in person and on the phone - to actual people
How to make a complaint and get recompense
Hard agree about finances!
To honour invitations even when they don't 'feel like it' and to plan things around such invitations so they don't end up having to flake out

RupertCampbellBlacksEgo · 29/12/2024 12:06

Everything you do. If not more.

Ladybyrd · 29/12/2024 12:04

Financial. It's hugely undertaught but can make all the difference in their life trajectory. My parents actively encouraged me to get in debt - my dad even told me to lie about my salary to get lower interest rates. Both my brother and I have spent a lifetime in debt and neither of us are homeowners. I'll do whatever it takes not to pass that on.

Digdongdoo · 29/12/2024 11:59

Fidgety31 · 29/12/2024 11:54

To understand finances- tax codes, credit cards, debt, bank accounts etc

This. Student loans, mortgages, pensions too. All the money and budgeting stuff.

SoulMole · 29/12/2024 11:57

How important a pension is.

DangerMouseAndPenfoldx · 29/12/2024 11:57

This seems like an odd question. I feel like it’s obvious that they need to be able to do everything that you expect from a functioning adult.

username299 · 29/12/2024 11:56

Cook
Manage money
Respect themselves
Work hard
Good manners

LandSharksAnonymous · 29/12/2024 11:56

To be able to have reasonable conversations with people who hold different views, opinions, beliefs and have different socio-economic backgrounds to them without descending into arguments, name-calling and insults.

Doesn’t matter what else they can ‘do.’ If they can’t do that, then their parents failed them.

TickingAlongNicely · 29/12/2024 11:56

Clean
Basic DIY (fuses, leaks, flat packs etc)
Basic car maintenance if driving
How to Google
Cook
Safety awareness
First aid

Or just send them to Scouts

Passivelypresent · 29/12/2024 11:54

Budgeting
A good spag bol
Low level fixing skills - sewing, basic electrics, basic plumbing, basic car maintenance.

My biggest one for my own kids is to be confident and able to meet their own needs independently on every level. Being comfortable being alone.

Fidgety31 · 29/12/2024 11:54

To understand finances- tax codes, credit cards, debt, bank accounts etc

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