To think this is off? Parents…

Any reason you haven't chased your children's father for maintenance for them?

You confused us OP.

We didn't confuse ourselves 🤷‍♂️

So they support you financially, provide free childcare, buy you things for you to take care of yourself and their biggest sin is wanting you to stop smoking because they presumably care about you? Am I missing something? They sound like good parents. My parents aren’t particularly tactile or cuddly people and I can’t really remember the last time we said I lovey you to each other but they do so much for my DH and I and our kids and are hugely supportive. I know they love me, I don’t need to hear it, they show it.

Would you consider going for counselling next year? You really don't sound happy, and also don't seem to know what you want or how to fix things.
Do you ever think about where you want to be in 6 months or a years time?
The situation you are in now may feel suffocating, but freedom can be scary and full of uncertainty. Don't let that fear put you off exploring alternatives.

This sounds like a very strange set up , if you don’t live with them how do they know about what you are eating and how much you smoke ? It seems to me that they feel that you have never fully grown up and the way you write / things you have written would lead me to agree with them . Btw smoking , even outdoors is not good for your children and leaving what I assume is dog ends about is disgusting.

Can you explain what you meant by 'you don't get childcare' whilst also stating you work two jobs and they look after your kids?

I said if you didn’t keep on I will give up for myself!

That sounds like a 12 year old talking. There's nothing stopping you giving up on your own according. If you don't want to be treated like a child, then stop acting and talking like a child!

And none of your updates are helping your case, you're just coming across as more ungrateful for what they do. "They don't help with childcare", but they look after your kids while you work!

No she didn't. She died from other health complications while taking them.

By helping with finance do you mean they help you organise your finances ie advice on investments or do you mean give you hand outs? If the latter you’re very far from self-sufficient…

…if you don’t live with them, how do they know all this stuff? Stop sharing so much with them.

Also, I use the jabs, and you can’t get them if you are not overweight / obese .. so if you have got them, and your weight is fine, someone has been telling fibs.

All I have time to add is, do not take the weight loss jabs... someone up here died from them, a nurse.

How much do they give you?

They look after them when I’m at work and I do appreciate it but they would rather spend time looking after and helping other people than my children.

Eh?

So what does that ^^ mean? 😳

They are clearly people who likes to help people and you are happy to receive the help but not for them to get very involved in your life. I agree with all of their points and I would have told my child to pick up her cigarette butts and I would have bought her expensive skincare products for Christmas if I knew she'd benefit from them. That isn't necessarily a dig at you. They just want you to feel and look healthy. It sounds like you are struggeling in life with health and money and they are showing love by trying to fix that.

If you're living in your parents house, they are supporting you financially, and they provide regular childcare they are going to treat you as their child/dependent in some way, especially as you are 50.

I'd focus on becoming independent if I were you.

The fact that your ex is controlling/doesn’t help is not the fault of your parents.

You have a choice here: take the help but accept it comes with their comments about your lifestyle. Or stand on your own two feet.

My mum helps with my childcare, she is forever making judgemental remarks about my parenting decisions, it’s just something I have to put up with.

Also where are you leaving all these cigarette butts that you occasionally sweep up where you've got young kids?

How old are your kids? Do you live with your parents or just near? It sounds like you need more distance and less dependency on them.

You can say no. Do you want weight loss injections? No thank you. You should dye your hair green. No, I'm definitely going orange. Leave the kids at their Dad's. No I want to see them.

You rely on them for childcare and money. You need to stop some of this. If you're working two jobs plus claiming what UC you're entitled to plus CM and you can't afford to live you need to take a look at your lifestyle x

Not sure they are appropriate people to have around your dc given how your childhood was....

I can't get over the fact that you are 50! How old are your children?

What are the complaints? That they tell you to lose weight, be healthy etc? You can't really take money and lots of help from them and expect them to never have an opinion