5.5 year old gets up on own

I can't get worked up about the theoretical risks of a kid wandering down to get safe foods and switching the TV on.

I'd listen to mine having lovely conversations with the cat as she fed her and then traipsed off to the sofa with a blanket and food to watch TV.

It was bliss after the first one with the SWAT team father and grandmother (never mind helicopters, they were far too far away) had learned that nothing can happen until Mummy's eyelids had been peeled back by the eyelashes at 3.47am.

I think you need your wait until you have a 5 yo before you say it’s way too young. You currently are allowing your 3 yo to go downstairs by himself for 20 minutes. In two years you might well allow your DS1 to go downstairs by himself when he wakes up.

Your 3 yo, unsupervised downstairs for 20 mins, could choke, get his hands on chemicals, etc, every bit as easily as the 5 yo who goes down by himself for an hour or so. The only difference really is that most 5 yo have more sense than a 3 yo.

Though, don’t most houses with young children keep sharp knives and products contain chemicals out of reach in a high level lockable cupboard .

At what age do children become a non choking risk? Or are you forever going to be hovering in close proximity in case a heimlich manoeuvre is required?

I think it’s fine. I have very happy memories of getting up early when I was that age and even younger. I was the youngest child and it was the only time I could be alone. Even now (decades later) I love to get up before the rest of the family. For an introvert it’s a great way to recharge one’s energy.

But the same is true at any age.

I'm sorry that happened and obviously glad he's OK!

But an 8 year old could choke. A 15 year old. A 50 year old...

Incidentally, I wouldn't have allowed a 5 year old to have peanuts because I was told as a child that, if you inhale them, they swell so that's an added risk. No idea if that's actually true or not! But mine didn't have peanuts until older.

But that's point. You can mitigate against risk but you can't eliminate it entirely. Life is risky.

My daughter did it from a similar age. Not cereal (glass milk bottles with difficult to use lids) but a smoothie carton and brioche or something. All was fine. She's now a very independent teen.

My DB choked on peanuts at age 5 and nearly died. He was unsupervised by the Nanny. He is very responsible and independent at that age but an accident is an accident.

No not at that time for that long.

I have a 3 year old and 5 month old. We all wake up the same time I get DS1 ready he goes down to play with toys only while I finished off getting me and baby ready and we head down for breakfast now more then 20mins max.

I would be worried about choking and chemical and sharpes etc.

I know a Mum who uses a camera. So he toddler can play downstairs in the lounge but visible at all times on the camera. But no way would I be sleeping whole a child is left unattended.

My parents always told us to stay in our rooms to play in the mornings. But 7am is a very reasonable time to be up and ready foe the day.
Once we were age 7/8 we were allowed downstairs to make our own food get pur water etc. 5 is waaaaay to young.

Mine does this. I get up at 7, he gets up 5.30 to 6. If anyone thinks I am helping anyone "develop" at 5.30am they are incorrect!

Doesn't matter if she brushes before it after eating in the morning, as long as it's done at night and one other time.

The point isn't to be reckless.

The point is that you create a safe environment for your childen through education and a carefully controlled environment that allows for them to recognise and identify managed risks but provides the opportunity to learn their own capabilities. That's not the same as putting them at risk.

I mean, I'd be happier with a well prepared 5 year old doing what the OP does than a child running round the playground with a lollipop in their mouth in full view of their parent or running with their hands in their pockets and i see both of those happening frequently!

You can miitigate against risk but you can't eliminate it entirely in any situation.

If you're worried about berries, don't give berries. But choking risk by 5 is lower than at younger ages becaise they have learnt to chew and swallow properly by around 4. But that's where judgement comes in based upon the individual child.

Presumably you eat unsupervised? I've only.ever choked once and I was 46 at the time. What would you do if you choked and you were alone?

But what if they choke on a berry?

I was taught to use matches safely while in primary school. DM's friend's DC weren't. So while she was out, they took the opportunity to experiment. But because they knew they weren't allowed, they took them under the bed in their DM's bedroom. They caused a major fire.

Some of you really need to look into the huge benefit of the Forest Schools which allow 2 and 3 year olds to chop firewood with axes!

Research the benefits to young children of learning how to identify take and manage risks.

DS has done this from a really young age, under 5. Short of locking him in his room I don’t know how I would have stopped him as he would creep down really early. Choking was (still is and he’s now 11) my main concern but I had to accept that risk and he would just make himself cereal - he knew not to eat grapes etc.
I also put the sharp knives and toaster out of reach after I caught him toasting a bagel.

Sounds like a great, independent kid. As long as she is in no danger and doesn’t wake anyone else up, let her crack on!

Congratulations! The day we taught our kids to make cereal and put a film on, was the day our weekends changed for the better!

Mine always got up first but didn’t get food. It was tv only. My youngest has a tablet so watches that in bed instead of coming downstairs.

My concern would be that she hasn't brushed her teeth before eating and potential choking risk foods.

I get mine up (brush their teeth, get them breakfast, prepare a bowl of snacks they can grab later) and then go back to bed for a bit, they play (mostly) happily together until I get up and know they can come get me if something happens, even if they just need to complain about each other/get me to open a box etc... I was woken 3 times this morning... . I try to only give them low risk foods however (e.g. no popcorn/grapes etc, they can have those when I am awake just in case), mine are 7 and 4 and we have been doing this for quite a while (I also try to make sure there are no strangulation or suffocation risks accessible e.g. plastic bags) and obviously have the added advantage that if something happened to one the other would most likely come and get me.

Stay in her room with snacks, toys and books - would you not be worried that she’ll swing out of the curtains and injure herself, jump off her bed and bang her head against a hard object, climb on to her chest of drawers and fall off, mess with the light bulb in her lamp that is switched on. Swallow a small piece of a toy, etc, etc, etc.

I would imagine that the OP had made her downstairs as safe as possible - child locks on high level presses that house anything with chemicals in it, matches, sharp knives, etc. Unplugged appliances. Cooker switched off. Exit doors securely locked. Has smoke alarms in every room. Probably has told her DD to leave the door of whatever room she’s in open and left her own bedroom door open.

No. I would worry about choking. Also I wouldn't want my child watching TV/using electronics for more than 15 minutes a day at that age which is what I would suspect would happen if they were left to their own devices. Plus I'd just get up and spend time with them, it's not too early. Alternatively I would get them in my bed with me with a book if I didn't want to get out of bed yet.

Mine did similar at this age.

They're now independent and capable adults.

The evidence shows that, as long as basic safety precautions are taken and parameters are managed, children thrive in situations where they are able to take and manage smalls risks. They learn their own capabilities and develop confidence and self esteem when they can do things for themselves.

When my children were small, boiling/hot water was never left in kettles. The wires were safely out of reach and plugged out when not in use. I don’t think any/many parents are in the presence of their five year old at home all the time.

Minimise risk as much as possible, explain potential hazards to children from a young age and not to climb on worktops, tables, dangers of hot water, etc, etc. The OP’s child is 5, not a 2 or 3 year old.

I do but not for an hour and half in the morning. Remember the OP is asking what others would do not for others to judge her. I was just answering her questions about what I do.