To think you get your 'spark' back post menopause?

Just popped back to say I'm back on HRT, apparently I can have it again now. It's a little like so many things wrong with me, let's try this and reduce some and then see where we stand. So today I've put on my first patch in several years. Fingers crossed.

I’m not sure HRT is that good. There are so many things that change around the time of menopause. Losing parents, partners either through divorce or death is common in your 50s & 60s. Losing your identity as a mother or your identity after retirement. All these things have a huge impact, probably the biggest change is in your looks.

You really do become invisible and for some women this can be catastrophic, HRT does not affect the external aging process although you retain your libido you are no longer attracted to men the way you did. For some it’s a wonderful leveller, your glamorous friends no longer stand out.

I have had a crap few years, I had to come off HRT due to breast cancer, which can in itself be very de feminising if you have to have a mastectomy. But I’m now 3yrs on and still clear of breast cancer. I have no libido thanks to the hormone blockers but in some ways it is great not worrying about whether I’m still attractive. I have a lovely DH who makes sure that I don’t feel unattractive.
2024 was going to be the year I worked on myself, but it hasn’t been a great year. I’m hoping that 2025 is different.

I lost my youngest sister recently, it’s had a profound effect on me, I am going to do what I want. I had already retired, well almost, I still work one day a week. I feel very lucky to be here and will live out my days financially secure. Being happy is down to you, I’ve learned that you can’t hang around waiting for other people to make you happy. I am planning some days out on my own, my DH struggles walking ( footballers knee combined with a stroke is very limiting but hopefully he will get a new knee next year so can join me). I’ve spent a lifetime working as an HCP so I really don’t need people around me. I had so many plans when I slowed down in 2019 but then COVID hit followed by cancer. I feel like I’ve been stuck on hold but now I want to have a go at all the things I’d planned back in 2019.

Menopause is just one small area of aging. HRT does not stop the general aging process and believing it will may end up in disappointment.

Soy Isoflavones. I was trying to take 2x daily but I mostly forget to, so I get a hot flush then take one or two pills that day and like magic, no more flushes for a few days. I've incorporated more soy into my diet, too.

It is so sad. I feel almost (almost - I am hugely grateful that she's still with us and in reasonably good physical health) bereaved when I think of how she was pre-menopause. She's a completely different person now, and I grieve for the mum I used to have, and for the life she used to enjoy.

Same. Peri was awful. When it was finally over everything levelled out and now I feel like me again.

No HRT and I’m glad of that.

What supplement killed off the hot flashes please?

Folate needs to be between 30 and 45 nmol/L and B12 should be between 70 and 150

However, even at the lower end of these ranges you could still be feeling unwell. GPs will do a FBC and in the absence of anemia will not bother testing iron, folate or B12 when the effects on red blood cells are one of the later symptoms you would develop

I'm 53, about 2 years post meno, I just feel normal. Peri wasn't that awful for me though, I had a few symptoms but not life changing. I do have some weight to lose, having always been pretty slim before.

No HRT other than vaginal oestrogen and a supplement which has killed off the hot flushes. I am super focussed on diet, exercise and general wellbeing - textbook really. I'd recommend looking into clean/Mediterranean eating and weigh training if you haven't already.

There is a difference between the hormones in contraception and certain types of HRT. I've suffered with PMDD for years which has always been exacerbated by oral contraception. I'm now on HRT (started at 45 symptoms from aged 40....not sure why I waited so long!) and most PMDD symptoms have gone. (I should add I also still take citalopram which was initially for PMDD)

HRT has been completely life changing for me. It isn't for everyone but I always maintain it's worth a try. I take utrogestan and everol patches but I've also had gel oestrogen which worked too. I had provera (which is a different form of progesterone and I believe is more like oral contraception) when there was no Utrogestan to be had and that was not good for me and acted similarly to oral contraception. I believe it's because utrogestan is a more "body identical" form of progesterone.

Hi Several GPs have said to me that estrogen blood tests are unreliable. I tried Newson clinic but can't seem to increase my estrogen levels without feeling awful. Do you know what your levels are now that you feel better and what they were before please. thanks

Hi can I ask what optimal levels are for B12 folate etc, you've obviously done your research

Absolutely. I just have a much more even temperament. my health is overall better. I have more energy, sleeping better. No more periods, no more mess, no more abdominal pain. Menopause is wonderful.

Without the input of different hormones every two weeks and the ups and downs and anxiety that comes with it, the complete absence of hormones makes you really quite calm and peaceful.

Post-Meno here - but TEN long years of allsorts of symptoms/GP was utterly dire/innapropriate HRT regime without adequate monitoring.
Eventually in desperation, went to private clinic - "ok" but ultimately a waste of time and money.
FINALLY - went to a Dr Louise Newson trained GP - am only 8/9 months in but it's been LIFE CHANGING.
Am several years past menstruation, but anyone who's had a period within the last 10 years is possibly "suitable" & my blood tests indicated my areas of need
Have since been on a "good" HRT regime/Dr Newson's GP now communicates with my GP practice who will now do the blood test/dispense the prescriptions etc
As for the symptoms - MANY life-enhancing improvements in certain areas/steady progress in others

It certainly felt like coming out to a better brighter side to me. Life without oestrogen is infinitely better, in my experience (although I wouldn't be without my pessary).

I feel like this with the ear fullness and TMJ pain. Think mine is post covid symptoms though in the mix.
I feel hungover and achey every morning despite drinking a lot of water.

@Apileofballyhoo
thats amazingly helpful! Thank you 🙏🏻

@IBlameTheDog it sounds like histamine to me. More oestrogen can make that worse. Is it utrogestan capsules you are on? Body identical progesterone is supposed to help with histamine. I think if you are on anything higher than a 50 patch/2 pumps gel the guidelines from the British Menopause Society are to be on 200 mg progesterone a night continuously (or 300 cyclically).

Look at mastcell360 for a list of low histamine foods and stay away from the worst culprits. No processed food (I'd include anything in tins and cans in this). No fermented foods (yoghurt, kim chi etc), no alcohol, no aubergine, spinach, tomato, dried fruit, aged meat, smoked anything, bacon, ham, fish. Fresh chicken is best. Onions, broccoli, apples and blueberries for fruit and veg all contain quercetin so can actually help, but most fresh fruit and veg are ok. Citrus can be aggravating but it can all be quite personal too. Best cheeses are soft fresh cheeses, mozzarella and ricotta, that type stuff. Basically the older the food the more histamine it has. Not all probiotics are suitable, and I dont know which ones are, that could be personal too. Try a quercetin supplement, and a DAO enzyme supplement if you can get it. Tea blocks DAO enzyme or something like that, can't remember.

A short period of time should tell you if you're on the right track. Do you think you got worse since upping the oestrogen? Diet is restrictive but if you do it properly for a short time you should get answers quickly and can start adding things back in. Also a little bit of something might make no difference to you, so a few leaves of spinach might be OK but a whole spinach salad not OK. People talk about histamine as a bucket, fine to a certain level but can overflow and cause problems. Also if your mast cells are overreacting they can calm down on a low histamine diet and not overreact to every little thing when you start to add food back in.

Apparently anti histamines can make your body think it needs more histamine so it ends up producing more, so they can help short term but not long term. They don't actually clear histamine from the body, they just block cells from receiving it or something like that.

GPs are useless at diagnosing deficiencies. I’ve read peer reviewed papers suggesting that a woman’s ferritin level should be above 75 in the absence of iron deficiency symptoms and 100 if you have them. If you get palpitations, fatigue, restless legs etc. My ferritin was 34 when I got it checked and I started taking ferrous sulfate (contains 66mg of iron rather than the meagre 14mg you can usually get) and it completely changed how I felt within a few weeks. If you only take a low dose, it won’t get you up to where you need it to be! My latest Ferritin result was 66 so I’m going to carry on taking ferrous sulfate for 2 more months and then drop down to a lower dose.

Folate deficiency also makes you feel like shite. Ditto Vit D. Sorry to be so enthusiastic about all of this but I am honestly amazed at the change I’ve experienced by supplementing correctly!

Do you know what your last B12 reading was? How strong is your B12 supplement?
One of the weirdest B12 symptoms is drenching night sweats so it’s easy to see how it can be mistaken for hormonal changes

Please tell us more about this..

@zaxxon There is no answer to this post because - just like before menopause - everyone is different after menopause too.

What happens when you stop taking it though? Surely you can't stay on it forever?