Ick of Christmas present from Dp

OP I think you’re right to feel disappointed and put out by it. I’m the least high maintenance person around but can still totally get where you’re coming from. Opening a present from a romantic partner and seeing its jewellery and then seeing a nine year old get the same actual present by the same giver would take the shine off for me. I wouldn't do it myself.

Obviously OP you have learned absolutely nothing from the vast majority of posters.

Unless there is something you are not making people here aware of all I can say is good luck. You are going to need it when this man sees the error of your ways. Keep your LIST for those who can accommodate it to your liking

if I didn’t say anything he wouldn’t know and probably ruin next Xmas as well! Should I change my perspective to it’s ok for me to be treated in a way I don’t appreciate?

He didn't ruin Christmas. Your reaction did that. By your own admission, you were really happy with the present, until some time later you discovered that he had done what he, and the majority of people here, think was a nice thing. You could say he had ruined Christmas if he had been malicious or neglectful. But instead he failed a test he couldn't possibly known he was being set, where you had never told him what the right answer was, and which 70% of people here would fail!

This has got to be a joke thread surely.

Or maybe it’s a reverse and it’s actually the DD who wrote it.

I don’t believe a grown adult would be this petulant.

What’s your relationship like, generally, OP?

“Usually Dp give each other a wish list of specific items or vague items like earrings so the other can choose.”

I think you may have answered your own question OP. Vague items are not a romantic sentiment in my opinion. If it is a specific set of earrings then I would say that’s different as you have your heart set on them and he went out of his way specifically to get them for you, and no one else, child or not.
If he got the same pair that you specifically asked for, for the child, then yes I would agree that it takes away the romantic sentiment in the first instance.

But a mere vague gift? I would say it’s a sweet gesture that he got them for you and DC and you now have matching earrings which I feel is rather lovely.

YABU

You actually sound like a petulant child. I’m sure his daughter didn’t care she got the same earrings as you and you are meant to be the adult. He thinks as much of you as his daughter. He bought both his ladies a beautiful pair of earrings each. That is special.

But you want to be MORE special. It’s actually quire sad that you had a tantrum
over something lovely that he did.

Okay to start, let’s not catastrophise things. Christmas wasn’t ruined. Nor will it be next year. This is why you need to change your perspective because it isn’t reasonable right now.

Yeah your partner can upset you (not on purpose) but we are all saying it isn’t worth being upset about.

Yeah change your perspective or husband - I’m sure all of your family would completely understand your reasoning.

A partnership has two people in it - not just you. He very reasonably told you why he bought the earring for you and his daughter.

You again continue to want to argue (as above) and we majority wise don’t agree with you. Again you make the same point (over and over again ad nauseum) thinking it will change our minds. It won’t. You are being unreasonable.

Christmas is ruined because of two pairs of earrings? Jesus. I wish you could hear how absolutely ridiculous you sound.

Should I change my perspective to it’s ok for me to be treated in a way I don’t appreciate?

Absolutely, because this is completely innocent on his behalf. And by many accounts here, totally normal.

If I was his friend/relative, you'd be raising a bit of a red flag for me

For a lot of people

Agreed, but not Op's other half. He's him. She's her.

So you didn't get him something special not on his list?

You just totally and utterly continue to miss the point people are trying to make to you.

Nothing like continuing to ask for advice/empathy, not taking anything on board and continuing to make the same point.

OP we are all kinda saying you need to change your perspective and not continue to argue your point. We understand, we just don’t agree. A difference with a significance you seem to be missing.

And?? So what?? The two most important women in his life got a beautiful pair of earrings. None of who are more important than the other. I think it’s a lovely gesture. He thinks a lot of both of you.

What super special gift did you get him OP?

Yes you are. I can't believe you actually complained to your husband about your gift, which he bought in good faith.

If I were him I'd want out.

Ridiculous! He loves you and he loves his daughter. He bought lovely earrings for the 2 women in his life in different colours. I think it is sweet. You sound like a 12 year old. Grow up.

Your a diva and you give me the ick. Some people are so ungrateful. As to crumbs.....seriously. go volunteer at a soup kitchen

I can’t be bothered with him at the moment trying to over compensate for being a thoughtless arse!

He doesn't sound at all thoughtless, he bought you a lovely gift as well as some other things.

You sound childish and petulant.