Ick of Christmas present from Dp

A father also gives his daughter something special, not a t shirt or gift voucher.

I don't see what was not special about it. He chose them for you. The fact that he also chose them for his daughter is neither here nor there.

There is nothing about which you need to feel upset. You come across as rather spoilt and immature. Get real please.

I agree with you but it isn’t easy to verbalise. Nothing to do with jealousy but I would not expect to like the same earrings as a child under ten. If he had given them to you with an explanation such as wanting you both to have the same to mark a connection or because he thought she would admire your taste then the context would maybe have been different and you would have felt differently.
Maybe try to reframe it for yourself and see it as a link, get a picture of the two of you wearing them.

I agree . It takes the ' shine ' off the gift when he gives the same to someone else . It doesn't feel like they've been specially chosen for that person more of a job lot .

Maybe next year you'll get a periscope OP

YANBU : batch buying the same gift, particularly when it's jewellery, for the "women in his life" is unimaginitive and insensitive to you. He might have liked the earrings - wonderful for him - but not great for you. I'd just not wear them unless they'd work for a fancy dress party or similar. What an utter doofus he is.

I think these replies are over-emphasising the fact that the second pair was for his DD. The step-parent dynamic is clouding the issue.
Imagine that the second pair was for his mother or his sister - do you think the OP would still have no grounds for complaint?

I would hate to get a "bulk-buy" present.

My DH gets exactly the same present each Christmas for his two sisters, despite them being very different people. It's like his brain is not capable of thinking of them as individuals and getting them appropriate different presents. He just sees something suitable for "middle aged sister" and gets two!

YABU for using the term 'ick', as an adult.

I don't think the poster is jealous of the daughter. I don't think she would have minded if the daughter had more spent on her earrings. It is the thought behind the present that is being measured. I'm guessing her partner might be 10+ years older than her so the OP wants romance and why not. She has obviously compromised just being with a man that has DC already and sounds like she has been fine with that. A lot are saying she should be grateful etc but she feels what she feels. It wouldn't take much for him to put it right - a promise to go shopping after Xmas to exchange the gift, spend the afternoon together and have lunch or something. Instead, he told her to throw it away! No helpful. I think she just needs reassuring.

that should come natural to dp for me

This is your problem. You can't make things come naturally if they just don't. He's not you. You're not him.

BECAUSE YOU ARE.

He sounds like a complete and utter monster. 😂

Does someone have the number to the highest court in the land because this guy needs to be locked up?

OP I despair at your attitude and perspective. The more you explain the better he sounds and the worst you sound.

He's telling you that because you are ungrateful, misguided, selfish and acting really poorly.

Let it go now. You keep making it worse. Stop talking about it and thinking about it. This will only continue to escalate and end badly.

Your attitude is disgraceful. "Crumbs"? You're clearly annoyed because you feel 'less' than his daughter now.

I had to explain that the relationship with his partner is completely different to his dd and Dc

I'd be surprised if he didn't already know that, but there are so many ways those differences are marked, aside from gift giving

@DivaORJustified
Are you pissed because you want the rose gold? Or pissed in general?
If you're the breadwinner buy yourself what you want.
Take his pair to a pawn broker or whatever

Ditto

It’s not a different take on things.

It’s causing high drama over a non issue. Creating problems that DONT exist.

He's a man and they are limited as to gift ideas, frequently. I gave every one of my relatives the same book this year and other than that bottles and bags (not all the same). My DiL and I exchanged the same bottle,in fact. No-one has complained and the book was eagerly awaited (it's a children's novel by me and my late DH).
Best not to be angst ridden about Christmas presents.

Yes this would bother me too. I'd like to think the earrings were bought be ause they were my taste, and fur him to have bought the same for a young child? Can't really imagine liking the same sort of thing.

Men often lack any imagination when it comes to gifts. They often find .multiples when they find something. You are lucky though. I never had a nice gift from either of my husbands. I buy my own now.

Being jealous of a child is a pretty ugly look. Get a grip.