Husband went to the gym on Christmas Day?

Are you in the UK? Most gyms in the UK would have been closed on Christmas day so if you are not in the UK that might make more sense to people.

I think for a first Christmas alone and for a young couple (who haven't got the stage where they're actively glad when the other one buggers off for a while) it's a reasonable expectation he would spend the day with his wife. Boxing Day is usually the day to go for long walks, bike rides, football matches etc.

I wouldn't have minded if it wasn't for very long and we had nothing else planned.

I was supposed to be out for a couple of hours running yesterday but I didn't end up going because I had a hangover. We have kids but we had nothing planned so it would have been absolutely fine for me to disappear. All any of us did yesterday was lounge around.

Instead I took myself off for a 45 minute run after work today and I feel better for doing so. I'm not leading some double life, I went for a run because I need to, got some big races coming up and because it makes me feel better. I wouldn't have gone Christmas Day because we were busy but I have gone to work in previous years so it wouldn't have been any different to that, better actually because it would have been for less time.

Of course I am assuming it was 2 hours tops, if it were several hours then I think you are right in feeling annoyed.

This is a communication issue. He was planning on going to the gym but didn’t tell you. You were expecting him to spend all day together and skip the gym just for Christmas Day but hadn’t said so. Especially as this was a different Christmas to usual. I get why you are upset. I would’ve been too.

YABU just be happy he spent a couple of hours doing something he loves and enjoy the peace to watch something that is more you than him.

dm used to work in the tax office and apparently Christmas Day was one of the busiest days for people filing their self assessments online. The Gym is much more interesting.

It would have pissed me off early on in our relationship. Now, I'd be glad he was out of the way for a couple of hours.

My gym is open every day and I would have gone but I got ill. Personally I don't think it's weird or could be bothered about it.

LOL. They love to do just that, even when we give sensible caring advice.

Have you discussed plans for Christmas Day beforehand? Did you happen to have different expectations without telling each other?

How is your social life here otherwise? Made some nice friends, perhaps will have a baby as well and Christmas will make much more sense to both of you...good luck

As long as he brings home the gold in next Olympics it's all good
Daley Thompson is often quoted as having said: “I train twice on Christmas Day because I know the others aren't training at all. It gives me two extra days.”

When I did some Christmasses years ago in the in laws and my husband has his family around him but I had no one, I ate my dinner and then sat on the end of the sofa with a book or a laptop or gone out alone for a long walk, but my husband always joined me. I felt very isolated even between people

Went to the gym.... of course he did. Cone home freshly showered/showered when he got home?

This is literally not a big deal. He’s not Velcroed to you. Be less needy it’s very clingy to be upset by this

You need to communicate better, but communication doesn't mean he doesn't get to go to the gym for a couple of hours just because you want to "spend the whole day together" rather than "only" 22hrs of the whole day!

Communication could be we'll have dinner at 3pm, then would be nice to have a walk and come back and watch Die Hard 2. You want to go to the gym? What time are you planning to go/how long for? Ok, you want to go after walk....I'll have a nice bath with my new smellies/get into my new PJs/read my new book then and you can shower when you get back and we can watch Die Hard 2 together!

Alternatively you can sit at home and wallow in some imaginary theory there is something wrong with 22hrs of togetherness compared to 24hrs.

As because you are both from different countries and have no one else here, may be he feels isolated? Just an option

When I used to go the gym I went on Christmas Day for an hour. It’s no big deal.

Wish my DH would go to the gym. In fact I wish he would just go out of the house. Anywhere would do and hopefully not come back.

Hmmm 🤔

Well, im never coming to you for advice

It depends on how long he was out.

3/4 hours or more then I’d be a bit annoyed.

Any less wouldn’t bother me at all.

I often go for a walk/jog and I had no idea that anyone would have an issue with me going out on my own.

Him not spending 24hours a day with you, doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you.

There is something wrong with getting upset in this situation. They had done all their planned activities for the day, there weren’t children or guests to be tended, and he does not need permission from OP to go run to the gym, or take a nap, or go for a walk. A person’s desire to go do something alone for a short stretch takes priority over someone wanting them to sit next to them on the sofa or whatever - your partner is not a comfort animal

100% agree with this. He shouldn't have to ask her permission to do a completely normal activity in what was essentially "down time". Just how many hours sitting like a potted plant on the sofa watching Christmas movies is enough?😂

Lots of people go for a run or walk Christmas Day, this is no different

If you can’t spend one full day together as a couple then ..
Then what?
Presumably you spend a full day together when you go on holiday?
If not does it matter, you are not going to fall apart because you do different things throughout a day.

Yeah but admit it, you’re both having affairs…