Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH asking if I had a nice Christmas irks me

259 replies

RainbowDr0p · 27/12/2024 10:04

I know I am probably BU but wondering if I am alone in this?!

We've had a lovely few days, Christmas's ice skating, mulled wine and shopping in York then lovely Christmas day and pizza hut, shopping and a panto yesterday. Everyone in good spirits.

On Christmas evening, DH asked if I had a nice day. I bit my tongue and said yes, have you?" and he said yes too. Last night he asked if I had a nice Christmas and I said I had but I hated being asked that as had I given any indication otherwise? He said he was just trying to make conversation and I told him he's not my hairdresser! We didn't row or anything and moved on just fine.

I've realised he asks this a lot after we have had nice days or unusual days. AIBU in thinking it's an unimaginative - maybe praise seeking - question?!!!

OP posts:
biscuitsandbooks · 27/12/2024 10:09

Huh? What's the problem with asking that? Confused

Elasticatedtrousers · 27/12/2024 10:09

Seems perfectly normal to me. What a weird thing to start a thread about!

IAmInTheBath · 27/12/2024 10:08

It sounds like you have a husband who cares about your feelings and experience.

You could answer with something like, loved it, but it would be even better if I had a nice cup of tea.

OliveLeader · 27/12/2024 10:08

This seems like a weird thing to be irritated by but if he has form for annoying you / not pulling his weight / being a PITA it’s maybe colouring your view.

stopthepigeonstopthepigeon · 27/12/2024 10:08

Your angry because your DP asked if you had a nice day?
I don’t get it.

RacingDriver · 27/12/2024 10:08

I think you are being a bit unfair. If my DH didn’t ask whether I’d had a nice Christmas I’d think he didn’t care and that he thought it was all about him / the kids. I put a lot of effort into making Christmas special (DH does help but I love doing it) and I like it that he checks I am enjoying it as I think if I said I wasn’t that he’d change things up so I did.

I also check in with him too - that’s just how we work.

Incenseda · 27/12/2024 10:07

Sounds like you have the Ick?
Did he help in the run up and do his share?
If he didn't and is asking did you enjoy it, like he played a part in making it nice, that would irritate me?

HotBath · 27/12/2024 10:06

It’s a bit weird, given that he (unlike your hairdresser) was present for all of it.

Alwaystired2023 · 27/12/2024 10:06

Im totally guilty of asking this question of my DP, sorry OP, totally don't mean anything by it other than 'have you had a nice day' and maybe as a way to invite some conversation about why it was or wasn't nice? I'm a very people pleaser type though so could be why

Not knowing your relationship you are more likely to be right if you think your DH is asking for other reasons