To just … not have toys?

Lol Mumsnet, never change.

The ice-cream set is one of the most played with things in our house, every new child makes a beeline for it. It may be brightly coloured plastic, but the way they play with it is proper open-ended, Montessori style shit. Very similar in that way to the play kitchen, only if anything it gets more use.

OP, get him whatever he'll actually play with plus a little to nudge him out of his comfort zone a little. My kids adore toys but my DNs were like yours and never really into them. They're all lovely teens now.

Emptying over the floor seems quite normal. Can't you just let it be and clear up at the end of the day?

@giveupontoys do you mean you don't how to play?
Cars - make a cardboard ramp and race the cars. See who can make their car jump furthest. Line other cars up to have one jump over.
Trains - say "Right what does the town need? Lets build it" and build a track route that goes to the station, around the "forest" (toy trees or ones made from cardboard), up the bridge and down the bridge etc.

See, I find this easy, even in my late 50’s. Maybe make noise of ice-cream van and you be the customer, he makes ice-cream and asks for the money and counts change (educational bit), or he makes tea, food if he has tea set/kitchen and serves it to you / his teddies or cuddly toys…

Is there only possibility of neurodiversity? My child didn't play with toys in a conventional way - he just liked to tip things out of boxes. At 7yo he is still like this. But he enjoyed watching train sets from about 3y and started role playing in the last year. And he loves action figures from TV, though again he didn't used to play in a very conventional way. Rather than being very choosy about toys, we latch onto any interests he does have and spend a fortune. 🙄

I am not being sarcastic. It sounds like you are not even willing to try

Would it be that you fuss around him, butting in if he’s not playing with a toy in a way you’d like or telling him not to be making a mess, or to be careful, etc ?

Op, you mention how stressful it is for you when he tips everything out.
I wonder whether he’s picked up on that on some level and doesn’t like causing stress?
I would try your very best to get him to play inside; whilst outdoors is great, it’s not realistic when he/ you are sick, weather is very bad or for every half term which will be coming up when he starts school

Sone children are just playing differently. If you go to a toy shop or playgroup what does he tend to pick up, given a free choice?
Some children just prefer playing with people rather than things.
Or they want a different sensory experience, maybe play-doh or something that can be played/hammered/has buttons or functions or does music.

Climbing might be a sensory seeking behaviour, is there another indoor toy he can pull/reach/use his strength on?

Dd has always loved her toys but her friend was the same as your son. Never liked them or played with them. Some kids just aren’t interested. Would he like more of sciency set that you could do with him maybe as opposed to something that needs imagination?

Play doh is quite a fun activity that you can both engage in together.One of my sons wasn’t interested in toys but loved books . You do need to play,read with him .

It doesn't have to be toys but you need to gainfully occupy him somehow.

One of mine we more or less stopped buying toys for too (he's autistic and thinks most of them are pointless) but it was a question of finding what else to keep him busy with instead.

I had one who didn’t really play with toys. His older brother had the house filled with toys but he was never really that bothered. I remember he did like those action figure type dolls so had some of those and was obsessed with football but Christmas and birthdays were v quickly clothes and shoes type gifts rather than toys and games.

You don't know how to sit on the floor and pick up a toy?

Does he enjoy books, since you mentioned being a bookish household? Does he look at books on his own, try to read words, etc.? How are his communication skills?

You need to get down on his level and play with him. I suspect a lack of this is the problem

The vehicles are all quite similar. Does he have a floor mat and road signs he can set out scenes on?

DS requires a lot of parental input with his brio. To be fair, it would be quite boring pushing trains around on your own, and he’s not at the level of being able to build track layouts on his own.

Paw patrol tower sounds a bit gimmicky. We’ve been caught out with hot wheels a few times like this. They only do one thing, so once they’ve played with them once, they don’t really see much point in playing with them again

Really would recommend ‘doing’ toys as opposed to imaginative toys. He sounds quite sensory seeking as well - you could get a spinning stool or a swing or a tent or something.