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AIBU?

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DH complaining about my Christmas Dinner

342 replies

TuffasOldBoots · 26/12/2024 05:12

Primarily the beef! Which wasn’t good - tough as old boots he said. Reminded him of a shoe etc.

DH worked Christmas Day, home at 2. We have small children and I spend the morning/afternoon running between the kitchen and the living room cooking/playing with the kids/opening presents/building toys and cleaning and cooking a big Christmas dinner.

Main was a huge turkey crown which was beautiful, everyone enjoyed it. All fresh veg, homemade cauliflower cheese, Yorkshires, all the trimmings etc. Beef was an extra (small joint) but not the main event. Texted DH in the morning-help! I’ve never cooked beef before (I eat mostly a vegetarian diet) how long does he want me to cook it for? Just guess! Was his reply!

Served up the dinner and he moaned and moaned about how the beef was like an old boot and he could barely cut through it.

It was very tough-told him to leave it and just eat the turkey.

To make it worse - his family came over in the evening and they asked how our dinner was and all he could mention was the beef being like old boots and our kids laughed along. His Mum then offered to teach me how to cook beef. Grr! He also commented on how much I had spent on the turkey this year-it was expensive but I was alone with the children and had to wait for DH to be home so I could shop for it, not much left and spend a lot more than usual.

Felt like I was in the kitchen for several hours prepping, cooking and cleaning. I was exhausted when he came home. AIBU? I was v.embarrassed when he mentioned it in front of his family and it sounded like the whole of my dinner was shit when it was only one of many other dishes.

OP posts:
YourAzureHiker · 26/12/2024 11:53

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excelledyourself · 26/12/2024 11:53

Or whoever @whatslife is has accidently posted on this thread instead of their own earlier today.

onwardsup4 · 26/12/2024 11:52

Maybe the OP of the other thread posted on this by accident ?

TuffasOldBoots · 26/12/2024 11:52

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Not me!

OP posts:
TuffasOldBoots · 26/12/2024 11:52

arethereanyleftatall · 26/12/2024 11:47

Given the updates 10 minutes ago, I think we can safely save our breath and our time ladies.

The op doesn't want help.

She wants to bury her head in the sand about the actual problem and continue to live in, and expose her children to, this misogyny.

She isn't the first.

No i don’t-I was just trying to convince someone in the comments that I wasn’t on another similar thread.

OP posts:
YourAzureHiker · 26/12/2024 11:51

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YourAzureHiker · 26/12/2024 11:48

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arethereanyleftatall · 26/12/2024 11:47

Given the updates 10 minutes ago, I think we can safely save our breath and our time ladies.

The op doesn't want help.

She wants to bury her head in the sand about the actual problem and continue to live in, and expose her children to, this misogyny.

She isn't the first.

Thelnebriati · 26/12/2024 11:46

The beef isn't the problem. He has engineered a situation where he can devalue you, belittle you, and get other people to join in. Thats what you need to tackle him about because lack of respect in a relationship is a serious problem.

TuffasOldBoots · 26/12/2024 11:46

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lol that’s not me 😆Despite the bad beef (metaphorical and literal) we had a nice evening exchanging gifts and watching TV together. Don’t know who that other OP is but it’s not me! He wasn’t grumpy with the kids either.

OP posts:
YourAzureHiker · 26/12/2024 11:42

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excelledyourself · 26/12/2024 11:42

Look for the positive, OP. You won't be responsible for Christmas dinner next year.

Or at least not for his.

YourAzureHiker · 26/12/2024 11:39

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Wheresthebeach · 26/12/2024 11:38

That’s really nasty OP. You need to think about your future.

The beef cooking recipes/helpful hints are both missing the point and patronising. It’s not about the f*ing beef!

ButterCrackers · 26/12/2024 11:38

Next year it’s his turn

TuffasOldBoots · 26/12/2024 11:37

ClairDeLaLune · 26/12/2024 10:06

Why on earth did you cook beef as well as turkey? You were making far too much work for yourself. When did you have time to enjoy Christmas Day? Next year - do the minimum. Oh and your husband is an arse.

I did way too much! Especially as I was on my own. If he works again next year it’ll be Aunt Bessie’s all the way 😆

OP posts:
TuffasOldBoots · 26/12/2024 11:35

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What other thread??

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C8H10N4O2 · 26/12/2024 11:33

Notcopingbutstillstanding · 26/12/2024 06:03

You need to lose your shit, like I did three Christmases ago. I did bite my tongue till everyone had gone.
I'd produced 13 dishes for
nine people: all the usual suspects - and good vegetarian options for some family members. Working with an oven the size of a Rubik's cube.
After he'd heaped his plate, my H sat down, and over everyone else's "wow, this looks amazing" etc, leaned toward me, and said ...."did I miss the bread sauce?"
How I didn't Frisbee his plate, I don't know.
He'd been a grumpy git that Christmas and it was definitely passive aggressive, I know him.
Anyway. He's never pulled a trick like that again.

Yes this.

He's being an arse, you need to tell him he is being an arse and that he can cook his own bloody dinner next year if yours isn't up to his high standards. You managed the DC whilst cooking the whole shebang and he is whinging because an "extra" wasn't to his liking. Sod that for a lark.

TuffasOldBoots · 26/12/2024 11:32

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Huh?? 🤔 That wasn’t me?? Link to thread please!

OP posts:
YourAzureHiker · 26/12/2024 11:27

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Easipeelerie · 26/12/2024 11:24

Forget the beef. It’s just one examplele of how unkind he is. He sounds capable of great cruelty and selfishness. I’d LTB, not least because he so casually got the family involved in mocking you rather than having them celebrate you.

viques · 26/12/2024 11:24

MumChp · 26/12/2024 05:17

Next year you leave home and he fix Christmas dinner and entertain the children.

I wouldn’t wait until Christmas, plan something for Easter Sunday, (include his family) , then isolate yourself in your bedroom with a particularly infectious brand of Covid.

Not to mention Mother’s Day. Ditto. Or any random Sunday when he says he fancies a big roast dinner.

Twiglets1 · 26/12/2024 11:22

BugsyMaroon · 26/12/2024 11:20

I am not peculiar at all. The people who focus on fucking cooking instructions when it is abundantly clear that the OP has much bigger issues on her plate are just rather spectacularly missing the point.

And you are extremely rude.

I agree with you Bugsy but for your own sanity I advise leaving this thread now, as I’m doing.

RandomMess · 26/12/2024 11:22

Next year if you are still with your rude ungrateful H then find a deli counter that sells freshly roasted beef, turkey etc and buy cooked slices.

It would be better still for you to go out for several hours and it's his turn to cook.

Angry
jeaux90 · 26/12/2024 11:22

@BugsyMaroon I'm with you!

DH is a misogynist asshole and the OP should be divorcing the useless pig.

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