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AIBU?

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DH complaining about my Christmas Dinner

342 replies

TuffasOldBoots · 26/12/2024 05:12

Primarily the beef! Which wasn’t good - tough as old boots he said. Reminded him of a shoe etc.

DH worked Christmas Day, home at 2. We have small children and I spend the morning/afternoon running between the kitchen and the living room cooking/playing with the kids/opening presents/building toys and cleaning and cooking a big Christmas dinner.

Main was a huge turkey crown which was beautiful, everyone enjoyed it. All fresh veg, homemade cauliflower cheese, Yorkshires, all the trimmings etc. Beef was an extra (small joint) but not the main event. Texted DH in the morning-help! I’ve never cooked beef before (I eat mostly a vegetarian diet) how long does he want me to cook it for? Just guess! Was his reply!

Served up the dinner and he moaned and moaned about how the beef was like an old boot and he could barely cut through it.

It was very tough-told him to leave it and just eat the turkey.

To make it worse - his family came over in the evening and they asked how our dinner was and all he could mention was the beef being like old boots and our kids laughed along. His Mum then offered to teach me how to cook beef. Grr! He also commented on how much I had spent on the turkey this year-it was expensive but I was alone with the children and had to wait for DH to be home so I could shop for it, not much left and spend a lot more than usual.

Felt like I was in the kitchen for several hours prepping, cooking and cleaning. I was exhausted when he came home. AIBU? I was v.embarrassed when he mentioned it in front of his family and it sounded like the whole of my dinner was shit when it was only one of many other dishes.

OP posts:
Grammarnut · 27/12/2024 23:14

TuffasOldBoots · 27/12/2024 20:37

It was just an extra - Huge Turkey was the main which was gorgeous. I made everything from scratch - mash, roasties, Yorkshire puddings, sprouts, parsnips, carrots, cauliflower cheese, stuffing, gravy. It was a lot of work especially on my own with young children, trying to keep an eye on them, play with them, open gifts, build toys - I don’t think I sat down for about 6-7 hours 😥 DH - “It was just a meal. I’ve cooked Christmas dinner loads of times” Yes, with me in the house entertaining the kids and playing with them. Not on his own plus one year his Mum came over and prepared all the veg for him and he still took all credit for cooking Christmas dinner on his own 🙈

Well, you now know who is cooking Christmas Dinner for the foreseeable future. Him.

Grammarnut · 27/12/2024 23:11

Never cook beef for Christmas dinner if you have not cooked it before. Beef is utterly unforgiving of amateurs and mistakes.
Point out DH is at fault for telling you to guess how to cook beef - a meat you cannot guess with.

Disturbtheuniverse · 27/12/2024 22:49

Well, you know what your mistake with the beef was, don't you OP? You didn't chuck it at DH's head... and the gravy too.

You know what to do now for next year.

GeorgeA12 · 27/12/2024 22:44

I've never had a good bit of beef from Tesco's. Think that is the problem! Nice bit of beef hard to come by now, only bet is a decent cut from the butchers.

mumda · 27/12/2024 22:33

TuffasOldBoots · 27/12/2024 20:30

I did google how to cook it and followed the minutes per pound instructions but it was still awful. My mum has bought joints from Tesco and despite cooking beef for 40 years (multiple joints not just the one 😉) she’s still had horrible ones from Tesco that she could barely cut through. She’s used to cooking meat too.

Slow cooker. From 8am until 5pm. First hour on high. No liquid. It'll be beautiful even if it's a rubbish joint.

chattyness · 27/12/2024 22:22

OP I hope you told him what for! Especially when he was trashing your efforts in front of his family, what an ungrateful **bag.
If we get a bit of beef that turns out to be tough, I slice it thinly and gently heat it through on the stove in some gravy, it really helps .Or you can cube it up and pop it in a stew pot with some chunky veg and stock and make beef stew , it will tenderise that way too.

DiduAye · 27/12/2024 22:15

I wouldn't be waiting until next year to pass cooking duties to the ungrateful twat It would be his job for next month at least and I would criticise it copiously!!

Nikki75 · 27/12/2024 22:07

TuffasOldBoots · 27/12/2024 20:32

Love Turkey - mine was beautiful and was gobbled up (pun intended)

😂

Oompawumpalumpa · 27/12/2024 22:07

Any leftovers? DH has a pair of brogues that need re-soling.

Ohnobackagain · 27/12/2024 22:00

@TuffasOldBoots rump isn’t the most naturally tender … needs a longer roast at a lower temp usually

RobertJohnsonsShoes · 27/12/2024 21:32

I burnt the ham which was the centre piece. DH laughed, hugged me and then ate round the burnt bits. Said it was the best id done even though it wasn't.

Next year go on strike

TuffasOldBoots · 27/12/2024 21:16

Ohnobackagain · 27/12/2024 21:08

@TuffasOldBoots what cut of beef was it?

Top rump.

OP posts:
Ohnobackagain · 27/12/2024 21:08

@TuffasOldBoots what cut of beef was it?

TuffasOldBoots · 27/12/2024 21:05

Properjob · 27/12/2024 20:53

...so you are going out ON YOUR OWN shopping for something nice in the sales tomorrow aren't you OP? Time off in lieu and a thankyou from H and his family. You're welcome ..

Yes!! Nothing can stop me 🤣

OP posts:
Blueuggboots · 27/12/2024 21:00

Next year he'll be cooking then won't he??

(I use the good food roast timer to good effect).

Properjob · 27/12/2024 20:53

...so you are going out ON YOUR OWN shopping for something nice in the sales tomorrow aren't you OP? Time off in lieu and a thankyou from H and his family. You're welcome ..

TuffasOldBoots · 27/12/2024 20:37

SummerSnowstorm · 27/12/2024 20:16

While cooking the rest of the meal, and watching the kids and doing Christmas morning?
It sounds like it was primarily for her DH, in that situation if he said just guess then I'd just guess not put time into it.
If it was a main part of the meal and DH seemed bothered about how it turned out and she had time that would be different.

It was just an extra - Huge Turkey was the main which was gorgeous. I made everything from scratch - mash, roasties, Yorkshire puddings, sprouts, parsnips, carrots, cauliflower cheese, stuffing, gravy. It was a lot of work especially on my own with young children, trying to keep an eye on them, play with them, open gifts, build toys - I don’t think I sat down for about 6-7 hours 😥 DH - “It was just a meal. I’ve cooked Christmas dinner loads of times” Yes, with me in the house entertaining the kids and playing with them. Not on his own plus one year his Mum came over and prepared all the veg for him and he still took all credit for cooking Christmas dinner on his own 🙈

OP posts:
DreamTheMoors · 27/12/2024 20:34

He complained?
Don’t say a word next year.
Set a fancy table.
Light the candles.
Serve him a dry peanut butter sandwich, no jam or jelly. Just peanut butter on stale old bread.
When he complains, remind him of this year’s roast and tell him you’re done trying to please him. Done.
Two can play at this shitty game.
My mum once didn’t cook at all — that was the last time my dad complained about the quality of Mum’s cooking. lol he sat down to a fully set table — and that was it.
Revenge is best served cold.

TuffasOldBoots · 27/12/2024 20:32

Nikki75 · 27/12/2024 20:25

I go through the whole Christmas event but seriously it's so overrated.
I don't even like Turkey.. why do we do it .

Love Turkey - mine was beautiful and was gobbled up (pun intended)

OP posts:
TuffasOldBoots · 27/12/2024 20:30

I did google how to cook it and followed the minutes per pound instructions but it was still awful. My mum has bought joints from Tesco and despite cooking beef for 40 years (multiple joints not just the one 😉) she’s still had horrible ones from Tesco that she could barely cut through. She’s used to cooking meat too.

OP posts:
TuffasOldBoots · 27/12/2024 20:27

masterblaster · 27/12/2024 19:54

His mum. You turned her down. You will forever be unable to cook beef.

180oC, sorry, didn’t give you the temperature.

She offered to come over to “teach” me how to cook beef after the event not before.

OP posts:
Nikki75 · 27/12/2024 20:25

I go through the whole Christmas event but seriously it's so overrated.
I don't even like Turkey.. why do we do it .

SummerSnowstorm · 27/12/2024 20:16

masterblaster · 27/12/2024 20:03

Or… look up how to cook it.

While cooking the rest of the meal, and watching the kids and doing Christmas morning?
It sounds like it was primarily for her DH, in that situation if he said just guess then I'd just guess not put time into it.
If it was a main part of the meal and DH seemed bothered about how it turned out and she had time that would be different.

masterblaster · 27/12/2024 20:03

SummerSnowstorm · 27/12/2024 19:12

Just don't do beef next year, but sometimes it's easier to adjust your attitude than try to fix someone else's.

Rather than stewing on it and letting it ruin your mood in future for something like that I'd just laugh it off, say yeah it's not great is it, I did tell you to give me tips! And to the inlaws something like "yeah it turned out awful, I asked DH for help beforehand as he usually cooks them and he said just guess so I don't think he'll make that mistake again!

Or… look up how to cook it.

masterblaster · 27/12/2024 20:02

DarkForces · 27/12/2024 19:17

This. She might have served crap beef but that's irrelevant and absolutely no excuse for belittling op in front of his family.

FGS he made a joke about the tough beef being tough, and people seem to be quick to judge DP for apparently being lazy when they were working on Christmas Day. The issue is that they made a special thing about cooking beef for their DP, couldn’t be bothered to look up the instructions, ruined it, and then we are supposed to all tell her how great she is.

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