A reminder to myself for October 2025

OP I’m sorry your work and effort doesn’t seem appreciated. Have you asked the kids what they thought, I remember being awful at that age and couldn’t possibly show actual emotion and gratitude to my lovely mum - but I did like the effort she made (the times she did). I’d say next year do what you want and can manage without spending a fortune and draining yourself dry, and see if anyone is perturbed you don’t seem to have run yourself ragged being Mrs Christmas.

As pp have said next year go low key. Tell them their budget, ask them for a present list, with Amazon links, pay one of them to do the wrapping. Cook a roast dinner, get it from M and S. Order four new books from Amazon, buy your favourite chocolate, new comfy pjs and then indulge yourself on the day. Book, chocolate, lovely bath etc etc.

I’m helping an adult child (single parent) get through it with her 3 and longing for the time when it will be just me, on my own, no fuss, tears, tantrums or mess. Please God, I’m so tired, let it be soon 🙏🏻

Your kids are at peak antisocial ages, in a few years they’ll want to be more sociable. For the next few years just cook a more simple roast dinner and don’t worry about the rest. Give up on the stockings and do one main present for each. That’s the max you need to do. Same for DP.

We went low key this year, no presents, just the tree and fireplace decorated. Good food and booze, no visiting,no visitors. It's been lovely. No drinking yet. Splash of Bailey's in morning coffee. Hubby asleep on sofa. Im watching Carry on doctor.

Just me, DH and DD. Today we have stayed in PJs all day, we had Iceland/Tesco party food for lunch, everything just went in the oven for 20ish minutes, then Camembert and part baked baguettes were dinner. We've had snack foods out all day, alternated between Xmas movies and songs while DD has built Lego and learned a couple of songs on her new keyboard. I've been doing one of the sewing gifts I got as a gift and DH had been tinkering with his new toys.

No stress, hardly any mess, cheap and cheerful.

It's one day, make it a day you can enjoy.

It sounds like you're always planning and hosting the type of Christmas you want, not necessarily the Christmas they want. There's nothing wrong with that but it also doesn't mean they'll necessarily enjoy it.

Sounds like they want a really mellow day, no fanfare with food etc. Probably also "cash in an envelope" as their gifts too.

I see sooo many threads like this. Women - because it usually is us - knocking their pans in for a special, family Christmas then getting upset that actually none of the kids really give that much of a shit about it! Losing it with the partner because he doesn’t do anything, because - News Flash - he doesn’t care either. Just stop doing it op. Stop it! If they want it, they can make the effort.

Honestly, I think Christmas is overrated. This year, I stayed at home with DD in our pj’s all day and only had 2 people over for about 10-15 minutes to drop some presents and that’s it. She’s played happily with toys and I’ve caught up on some laundry and chilled out. I’ve also not got for anyone this year apart from my DD and partner (who doesn’t live with us so isn’t here today). SO much better than last year where we saw lots of family, done the whole traditional thing and DD was so stressed out it ruined the whole day for her. This is probably how we’ll do most Christmas’s from here on out!