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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think MIL is being extremely rude

60 replies

glousy · 25/12/2024 13:02

This year my kids are all elsewhere for Christmas, one is working, one is on a gap year in Australia and one is with her boyfriend.
We offered to come up to MILs and make her dinner and save her travelling, but she is being bloody well rude.

First - she invited 3 of DHs cousins and 2 kids to join us, so I've gone from making dinner for 3 to cooking for 8.
Second - last night we put some Christmas music on (think wizzard and wham) and she complained they couldn't sing, it wasn't real music and got out her little MP3 player, put her earphones in and sung loudly over it
Third - She got up at 6 am and opened all her presents while everyone else was still asleep. She's since complained non stop about one of the gifts
Fourth - I planned to make dinner for 3, she's now complained endlessly so I'm having to make it for 2 when no one else will be hungry yet.

AIBU to think she's been bloody rude? She's in her 80s but I don't think that's an excuse!!

OP posts:
ScribblingPixie · 25/12/2024 14:13

She's a difficult old lady, but see it through, OP. Bite your tongue, try to make it work for everyone, have a few drinks, then vow to never, ever do it again.

TheBluntTurtle · 25/12/2024 14:12

Leave the washing up for her to do! Seriously she’s so rude - I really hope once dinner is down you put your feet up with a drink!

thescandalwascontained · 25/12/2024 14:06

I'd be heading home. Tell your DH you're done, and that clearly the old proverb applies here: No Good Deed Goes Unpunished. And you can see why his siblings aren't there, and you won't be doing it again.

thescandalwascontained · 25/12/2024 14:04

I'd be heading home. Tell your DH you're done, and that clearly the old proverb applies here: No Good Deed Goes Unpunished. And you can see why his siblings aren't there, and you won't be doing it again.

Bumcake · 25/12/2024 13:48

She sounds like a right minge. In your shoes I’d be getting plastered.

JustMyView13 · 25/12/2024 13:47

Stop trying.
She’s ungrateful and you’ll never please her.
Allow her to ask for what she wants from this day forward, and do nothing extra. Not your mum, not your problem.

Orangesandlemons77 · 25/12/2024 13:35

moaning, not 'mooing'!

Orangesandlemons77 · 25/12/2024 13:35

I have read they can lose their 'filter' with age maybe that is part of it?

We gave ours a stocking which they opened early as well. Not had any mooing. yet, but last year I did get stuff returned to be as it was not the right colour (blue)! so that does sound similar.

I have escaped to the bedroom with a glass of Prosecco and left DH to deal with the cooking situation!

HellonHeels · 25/12/2024 13:35

Was the dressing gown a gift from you and DH?

I'd take it back to exchange but just get the thing refunded to you.

Finish lunch and go home immediately afterwards. The rest of them can deal with clean up.

Imperrysmum · 25/12/2024 13:34

Sorry all, I’ve reported my reply and hopefully mumsnet will delete it soon. Sorry for offence caused

fuckmemytoehurts · 25/12/2024 13:32

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I mean I'm ND, she doesn't sound ND at all to me, she just sounds rude and miserable.

HisNameWasFelix · 25/12/2024 13:32

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I’m sure you didn’t mean to be, but this is pretty offensive. ‘Some sort of spectrum?’ 🤨

MIL just sounds like an arse to me.

MinkaLeDinka · 25/12/2024 13:31

The dressing gown of Christmas doom 😂

Hold tight OP it will soon be over and you’ll be home 💐

Imperrysmum · 25/12/2024 13:30

Greyrockin · 25/12/2024 13:28

I’m autistic and have ADHD - it doesn’t cause me to be rude to people.

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I was referring to her getting up at 6am and opening presents alone and listening to music on her own with earphones in. Sorry I didn’t mean to cause offence

Greyrockin · 25/12/2024 13:28

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I’m autistic and have ADHD - it doesn’t cause me to be rude to people.

Imperrysmum · 25/12/2024 13:26

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Wishihadanalgorithm · 25/12/2024 13:26

I think all you can do is laugh this one off and vow not to repeat this next year.

She is so bad - it’s a joke!

I can imagine how awful it feels to be there with her so maybe just go about your business and ignore her as best you can.

Leave as soon as you can and then focus on having a lovely New Year.

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 25/12/2024 13:20

glousy · 25/12/2024 13:17

A dressing gown ... she doesn't like the colour 😅

Show quote history

Ooooo, get her to put it on and pretend she’s Scrooge!!

Original poster
glousy · 25/12/2024 13:17

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 25/12/2024 13:11

What’s the present she’s bitching about?

Is it small enough to be frisbee’d out of a window?

A dressing gown ... she doesn't like the colour 😅

OP posts:
JollyHollyMe · 25/12/2024 13:17

My mother being odd with presents and wanted jydt to open all of hers straight away at Christmas was with hindsight an early dementia sign.

Createausername1970 · 25/12/2024 13:15

Go an wake her son up and tell him his mum needs him in the kitchen.

mondaytosunday · 25/12/2024 13:15

The getting up early and opening her presents sounds well odd - the rest I can get (though inviting the extra guests without telling you is so rude - had you bought the food)? Your DH needed to have said something.

saveforthat · 25/12/2024 13:15

Just rope in the extra guests to help with the prep/cooking. Give everyone a job.

Orangesandlemons77 · 25/12/2024 13:15

I'm just smiling politely and telling her 'how thoughtful but you don't need to cook' through gritted teeth.

Orangesandlemons77 · 25/12/2024 13:14

Mine is also being rude and in her 80s, maybe they don't care by then?

I have all the food ready made but she is in the kitchen cooking it from scratch and on the phone to her daughter about me not being 'very ambitious' with the cooking