Can chemistry/spark/attraction grow with time?

There has to be something that makes you want to see him again. If there's nothing but him just being nice then forget him.

I wouldn’t have picked my DH out in a crowd based on chemistry. However we became friends and 6 months later I had quite strong feelings. Looking back now it’s the best way, we had a solid foundation of friendship first with similar interests / values.

When DH and I started out, I remember having this conversation with my BF. I knew he really fancied me, but I didn’t ‘fancy’ him. I thought he was really lovely and funny, and I really liked spending time with him. She reminded me that every man (bar none) that I’d gone out with who I’d fancied like mad had turned out to be a grade A tosser, so I should give him a chance.

I’m so glad that I did. I ended up falling head over heels, and 15 years later we’re still madly in love. Instant spark can be overrated,

No in my experience it never grows. 2nd husband it was there immediately.

It’s nuanced, you can have acquaintances where nothing is there for years and you start to see them in a different way.

For people you have only just met, I would say not in my experience, no.

The only opinion that matters here is your own. It’s great to discuss it with friends but don’t listen to anyone else if you already know the answer in your gut. Trust it.

IME yes it does grow, and it lasts for longer when it's not that initial fireball. DP and I were friends for a long time and there was no spark then, but I fell for him slowly and it has been a far more lovely and somehow more intimate relationship than the others I've had, where I wanted to rip someone's clothes off straight away! I have been him for a good long while now and we still fancy one another very much indeed!

I think it can increase, but I've never known it start from nothing.

Essentially, if you don't want to kiss him, I personally wouldn't keep going.

In my experience, no,it sadly doesn't.

I've kept relationships going longer than I should have because they looked so good on paper, but I wasn't feeling it.

Now, if there's no spark or I don't find the guy attractive enough to kiss, I won't pursue, even if we get on well.

I think give it a chance. My, now DH, was so lovely when we first met. I thought he was great. But I think ten years down the line there is more of a spark than when we first met.

IMO I don't think a spark would grow, it's either there or not.

And it could still be physical through respect rather than fancying someone, IUSWIM. From my perspective it would probably morph more into more a friend zone.

How old are you both? If 20s I'd take your apporach of a bottle and give a little longer to see if anything develops. Late 30s - 40s you probably already know what you want, so if it's not ticking the right boxes it's a non starter.