I’m 48 and completed my (first) MSc in April, 25 years after Bachelors degree. Graduation is in April and I’ve been selected for a prize so get a 3 course dinner afterwards with max 2 guests. Was wavering on the dinner as none of my friends from the course will be there (only one prize per subject), but decided in the end too exciting not to go and get the prize. Also have the option of additional meet the tutors event (very tightly) sandwiched between graduation and prize giving and in a different location. In other words it’s already a very busy and potentially logistically challenging day.
I’ve had a lot of comments from friends about not inviting my children (15 and 13) but have stood my ground on this. It’s a school day, won’t be much fun for teens and I don’t want any extra drama. When the dinner invite came through it was the deciding factor as I can only bring 2 guests so DH and one other. Not going to choose between my kids so not bringing either. I still get comments from friends though.
Now all of a sudden my mum (75) is angling to come. She pushed quite hard for it out of nowhere. I was really surprised and taken aback. She was pleased about the prize (although it led to a long story about how she once got a prize but never told us, she does tend to make things about herself) but honestly if you asked her what I was studying she wouldn’t be able to tell you. She lives 200 miles away, and is financially dependent on me and DH. She could make it to the graduation by train but couldn’t get home again as too far so would also end up staying the night. Which would ruin the romantic hotel booking DH and I have made.
My BFF appears to be on Mum’s side. I just don’t get it - I’m middle aged, paid for the MSc myself, the only person other than my classmates who supported me was DH by picking up the slack when I was studying. As far as I’m concerned he’s the only family member who deserves a ticket. Am I a cold hearted cow? I know plenty of others will bring parents and kids and good for them. But I wanted the day to be about me and my friends from the course and not managing diva family members. Now feeling very guilty though.