DH having a rant at me

Ugh nothing worse than listening to someone moan and moan all the time. My Mum does this and it completely sucks all the joy from the room (or the car in your case.)

Yes you should be able to talk about your upsets with your other half, but no it is not ok to constantly moan and moan about life to them. It’s would destroying and boring to be on the receiving end.

Sounds like your poor husband has had enough, he’s telling you you moan too much and he’s sick of it.

Poor guy has an old cold car, you have a nicer warmer one. He has to go in that car every day, yet you moan about being cold in it for one day.

Op, you said in your op that he will apologise but you don't want to accept it.

As you can see from the responses, most people think you were the more at fault.

Has it occurred to you to apologise to him?

If the default here is for him to apologise regardless, if I were his friends, I'd be worried he's in a controlling relationship.

Good lord! You sound SUCH hard work

Stop moaning and whining and be kind

As pp have said, don't put your car in the garage and then allow it to be blocked in. How ridiculous.

If being in his car was that much of an issue then you should have got your car out of the garage

You were belittling him as a pp said and no wonder he was getting pissed off

I mean you do know that millions of children walk to school all winter OP? Some of them even in shorts (very common here in Scotland).
I don't think a cold car is going to kill them.
You say you don't want to forgive him so what now then? Divorce? You can't have a happy successful relationship with someone you resent. You'll ruin your children's Christmas with your huff.

What do you want him to do about it?

he acknowledged it.
Stop being a whiner. Nobody likes a whiner,

& you don’t want to forgive him? Well maybe he’ll stop asking for it & say feck no pleasing her.

The poor husband is probably at the end of his tether with the constant moaning

Don't use ND as an excuse. Plenty of people who are ND manage not to complain all the time.

What's the point in moaning about something he can't control? How boring of you. Keep it in your head. Also so what if it's cold when he drops the kids? They won't freeze. Moaning is unattractive and boring, try not to do it.

You’d already mentioned you were cold once, there was no need to keep going on about it. You know the car takes a while to heat up so there wasn’t anything he could do. Being cold is uncomfortable but it’s not dangerous and, assuming you’re in the UK, even when it’s cold it’s rarely at an extreme temperature. It’s not going to do you or the children any harm to sit in a cold car for 10 minutes or so. How do you cope if you have to go outside where there is no heating!?

You complained, he turned the heat up. Then you proceeded to complain twice more. What else did you want him to do? Pull the sun closer? Through extra layers of clothes at you?

You're being massively unreasonable.

Well shit, guess my 2014 car is ancient then.

OP take a blanket in his car next time. Put some in there for the children. Have you asked them if they feel cold on the drive to school? Did you thank DH for turning up the heating?

Dear me. Sorry OP you sound like an utter nightmare to live with. Stop moaning and take action. Get hand warmers or a hot water bottle to use if you really struggle with cold in the car.

Your kids will be fine. Maybe they should walk to school ,that would warm them up nicely.

Get this - when I was a school kid our car didn't even have a heater! We survived somehow. However my mum was a terrible moaner, always having a whinge about something. It spoiled a lot of things that would have been great fun if she'd cut the moaning.

To be honest, listening to someone complain all the time would absolutely bring me down. No one should have to just listen to that without question and who would want to me around negativity all the time?

I mean, it's December.....it's cold.......your kids have survived thus far.......not sure what you were hoping to achieve tbh?

Go and apologise to your husband for you being unreasonable.

You don't need to articulate every negative thought which comes into your head.

Something that puzzled me about the OP and your post. I thought hyperthyroidism made a person feel hot more easily? I have hypothyroidism and really feel the cold at times.

Eta: I just saw pp about over treating hyperthyroidism. Might be something you and @Bettib00 might want to check out if you feel the cold more than normal.

OP you mention you are ND. I strongly suspect DH may be (I know armchair diagnosis is not evidence). However, what I have noticed about him is sometimes he doesn’t filter what he says. It seems to go straight from brain to mouth. He has a thought and he verbalises that thought. It is not intended as a criticism or judgement by him. He is merely saying out loud some of the random thoughts that most of us have but discard without verbalising.

I wonder if that is the case here?

You were verbalising a train of thought but for your DH it sounded like you were criticising his car and his parenting.

Most people do filter what they say, often unconsciously. Sometimes I will consciously ask myself whether what I was planning to say will help the situation or not. If not, I hold back from saying it.

Put more clothes on.

Christmas is a stressful time for a lot of people. Nagging adds to it. Cut him some slack.

This will all come down to tone of voice, and it sounds as though you are whining. What do you expect him to do about your cold feet?

You stressing that the car is too cold when he takes the children to school is implying that he is a negligent and uncaring father for not noticing or doing something about it. I’m not surprised he found that upsetting, I would too.

Not speaking for two days is immature behaviour by both of you though.

This is moaning I would expect from a child OP - my kids might moan about the same thing three times that I cannot fix and I would say do you want me to magic it hotter?!! He can’t get the car to heat up any quicker so why are you complaining?

But if you know your husband's car is always cold, takes a while to heat up and you know the cold affects you, why didn't you make a hot water bottle in advance?

I have been hypothyroid in the past due to medical treatment so have some idea of feeling the cold more. It doesn't, however, make you bang on and on and on about something, which is what it sounds like you were doing. That would irritate and frustrate anybody and I would definitely have told you to shut up.

He doesn't need to just listen without expectation! Why would you think that? He isn't a doormat and nor should he be.

You complained that the car was cold and he did the only thing that could be done at the time - he turned the heating up. Even though it will take time to come through properly as you already knew. It won't come through any faster if you bang on about it. Did you want him to set fire to the car to make it heat up faster?

There is no concern at all about the kids going to school in a cold car. It is only for a few minutes and won't do them any harm at all. I assume you have sent them out dressed in suitable clothing for colder weather, not in their swimming costumes!