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For only wanting to pay my share of the food my sister and i like and not hers? New years eve dinner at my parents

39 replies

Laylalie · 23/12/2024 22:54

so the thing is.. me and my bf and my sister and her husband and their kid we all will be coming to my parents home for new years eve. My parents don’t eat this dish (meat) we like so we usally share the costs where i give money same day they buy it. My parents will be making a steak and turkey. I don’t mind i like both. But my mom said my sister asked her if i could buy it, because her payday is the day before new years eve, where most thing are closed here in norway. I wouldnt mind but last year she didnt pay me back for «their share» so i ended up taking the whole bill for this meat, had to buy 2 packs of it so ended up costing me almost $85. So know i have trust issues when it comes to this🤣 my mom kinda mocking me that im being a bit greedy. But why do i have to pay for their share for a meat they really want? Like its not my fault their priotizing other things when they know they want to eat this for new years eve. Like i don’t want to get poor before my next payday.. and i hate to remind people to pay me back and them making me feel like an asshole because my sis have kid and have to priotize other stuff and can’t pay right away..

OP posts:
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ueberlin2030 · 24/12/2024 10:52

Sorry mum, I won't be able to pay her share again.

toomuchfaff · 24/12/2024 10:47

Livinginadream · 23/12/2024 23:06

"No sorry, remember last year she didn't pay me back...I don't want that to happen again, and I hate chasing people up for payments. Plus I'm happy with steak and turkey."

this

NiftyKoala · 24/12/2024 06:24

Livinginadream · 23/12/2024 23:06

"No sorry, remember last year she didn't pay me back...I don't want that to happen again, and I hate chasing people up for payments. Plus I'm happy with steak and turkey."

This is perfect

Soontobe60 · 24/12/2024 06:20

If I invite people over for a meal, I will buy everything they are going to eat. If they requested a particular dish but I couldn't afford it I’d just say no.

RandomMess · 24/12/2024 06:09

Just grey rock reply "I paid for it last year, DSIS turn next"

Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 24/12/2024 05:40

If you don't take a stand nw then it'll become the expectation that you buy it every year.

Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 24/12/2024 05:40

You need to say no and point out that you paid for the whole thing last year so it's sister's turn and if she can't then it doesn't get bought.

Justsayit123 · 24/12/2024 05:33

Grow a pair and say no

Fraaances · 24/12/2024 02:10

Tell your mum you are still owed $85 from last year so no, it’s not happening. If she wants it, she gets it herself.

Laylalie · 24/12/2024 01:11

@EliflurtleAndTheInfiniteMadness i mean would be the right thing to do of her this year since i took the whole bill last, when she didnt pay me back. So i don’t think she can fuzz about it. Or she may fuzz because she may not get her way this time. Like why do i have to spend all my money. Litteraly not my fault she priotizes other things knowing she wants this dish. I could never do the same to her without paying back. I pay as fast as she buys it and have the money ready to send it

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Laylalie · 24/12/2024 00:42

@AlwaysTheRenegade its traditional norway chritsmas food «sheep ribs🤣 its very good

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AlwaysTheRenegade · 24/12/2024 00:31

Could you just be blunt with your sister and say you can't afford to buy it until you get her half of the money beforehand? What's the meat by the way? It sounds exotic and I'm jealous 😂

EliflurtleAndTheInfiniteMadness · 24/12/2024 00:30

. I wouldnt mind but last year she didnt pay me back for «their share» so i ended up taking the whole bill for this meat
Surely she should be footing the whole bill this year then. If she won't pay upfront I wouldn't get it this year. You know she's not going to pay you back and I wouldn't want to go through this every year.

Laylalie · 24/12/2024 00:22

@PokerFriedDips yea like i dont want to get fooled for the second time. Last time she didnt get payed the day she was supposed to be paid, and didnt pay me back at all. I don’t mind if i buy one and she buys one. But i don’t want to spend more money so she can keep hers. Me and my bf love turkey and steak so we don’t mind at all. Yea it gets expensive

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Wanttoeatallthecheese · 24/12/2024 00:19

Can't say I would ever invite anyone over, let alone my own DC, if I couldn't foot the bill. Otherwise, eat what is being made!

PokerFriedDips · 24/12/2024 00:10

You're not being at all unreasonable. You paid last year and were never paid back. "Fool me once, shame on you - fool me twice, shame on me" = don't fall for that one again. Don't buy it and just eat whatever food is available politely without supplementing it with something else. Anyone teasing you about being tricked into subsidising $85 worth of food and not being cool with suffering the same again is not a nice person.

WhereYouLeftIt · 23/12/2024 23:59

"I wouldnt mind but last year she didnt pay me back for «their share» so i ended up taking the whole bill"

And that's why it's her turn to pay this year. I'd go with @Livinginadream's suggestion:
"No sorry, remember last year she didn't pay me back...I don't want that to happen again, and I hate chasing people up for payments. Plus I'm happy with steak and turkey."

Your sister is trying it on. If she can't afford it, she does without; instead she' trying to sponge off you.

SereneCapybara · 23/12/2024 23:51

Just say you paid last year. It's her turn to pay this year.

Viviennemary · 23/12/2024 23:51

Just say you aren't being paid either. How ridiculous. I wouldn't bother going.

HolidayHattie · 23/12/2024 23:50

"No, I bought it last year, remember? It's DSis's turn this year."

pizzaHeart · 23/12/2024 23:45

Dragonsandcats · 23/12/2024 23:08

I’d just say that I will happily eat steak and turkey and give your mum a donation towards that

This^

Laylalie · 23/12/2024 23:43

@SoNiceToComeHomeTo yea or other tought if i bought one but we have to share it fair so everyone gets, but not where everyone gets to fill up buy just this dish. But i also don’t mind saving up that extra money for other things. Also turkey? Yum! But yea i agree, they can have their own dinner with this meat when they have their own money

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Inertia · 23/12/2024 23:43

Just tell your mum not to bother with the other dish, you’re happy with what she’s already Mali g and you’ll contribute to that cost.

SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 23/12/2024 23:34

I'd just forget about the special dish. Surely everyone can eat what their host cooks, or bring along an extra dish which everyone can share. This couple can have their special meat on their own at a time they can afford it.

Thereislightattheendofthetunnel · 23/12/2024 23:28

What’s this dish and why can’t she have it at another date during the holidays if she is strapped for money just before the 24th?
Clearly she is waiting for you to pay the full price