Exh left kids alone - handhold

I wouldn't do this. Surprised so many would!

I wouldn't leave a 9 year old babysitting a 6 year old but I would leave both a 9 year old and a 6 year old home alone (depending on course on the personalities of the children). My oldest regularly stayed home alone at 6 (where as my youngest has not at 6, because different personality).

OP - were the children ok about being left? That's the important thing to consider here, if they were upset or scared then they should not have been left but if they were ok being left then it was a parenting decision that their dad had the right to make.

Jennyathemall

Or maybe just my lunatics 😅😅😅

The 10 yo is ok-ish but definitely not the 7yo. Also unfair to leave the 10yo with the responsibility of the younger sibling. Lazy parenting.

Jesus Christ

I leave my now 14 year old alone with his 10 year old brother for a short period of time (half an hour) and have done for about the last year. But I wouldn't leave my 10 year old alone, I think that's too young.

I did. You’re just horrible HTH.

Can’t be trusted? You’d stop him seeing his own children because he popped to the shops? 😂🤣😆

As for the aforementioned 7 year old not being able to dress herself and crying her eyes out when pp popped to the chemist 10 mins away, what the actual hell? People need to stop babying their kids or they’ll all grow into incompetent adults.

saraclara · Today 19:50

The dad has nipped to the shop near the house. I can't believe that there's a whole long conversation on this thread about the house spontaneously busting into flames, and all the ridiculous 'what ifs'.

They are ridiculous but in the real world the more realistic worries are that one would decide to follow the dad, or the two would fight, or they’d decide to make some food or try something they’re not usually allowed to do. Even worse if eg there’s pets in the house or a nosy neighbour who’ll call child services on you.

And In the real world nipping to the shop isn’t a thing, you might get stuck behind someone slow at the counter, or forget something and decide ‘just a few more minutes’.

I don't think you are overreacting at all. The chances of something bad happening to them are very slim, but the fact is that it could still happen. No 10 year old should be responsible for a 6 year old, no matter how 'mature' they might seem. They are still a child and if there's a fire or someone broke in, there is actually little they could do. They were given no means to communicate either.

If it helps to get it across to your ex, mention the NSPCC don't recommend leaving a child under 12 at home and you feel that they were put in an unsafe situation (especially your 6 year old). It might make him think twice.

www.nspcc.org.uk/keeping-children-safe/in-the-home/home-alone/

The dad has nipped to the shop near the house. I can't believe that there's a whole long conversation on this thread about the house spontaneously busting into flames, and all the ridiculous 'what ifs'.

I could have and very likely did leave my children briefly at that age. No-one in authority is going to pull the dad up for leaving a 10 and nearly seven year old, to go to a nearby shop.

In the real world, nobody thinks it's ok to let a 9 year old babysit a 6 year old. Noone on this thread would do it, no idea why they're all bullshitting here.

You clearly didn't understand the exchange at all

KnittedCardi · Today 09:54

Meanwhile in the rest of the world young children get themselves to and from school alone. We are such a fearful nation.
Ive seen kids randomly crossing roads and nearly getting hit, or messing too close to the road, messing and shouting at people, in one case myself and another parent stopped a waayyyy too small kid being bothered by older kids. Just because a child can physically walk from a to b doesn’t mean they should

I think a 6 year old is too young to be left and I definitely think a 10 year old is too young to babysit a 6 year old.

It’s pure laziness to not take them shopping with you.

But they are his kids too and he gets to do what he wants.

Depending on your relationship, I would probably tell him how I feel again and ask that he holds off leaving them until they are a bit older.
But this may be something that you just have to get used to.

No your comment was as you well know. Vile.

If they're NT then that's 2 years too late to have learned to dress themselves.

Yup.

This. His call to decide if they're OK to be left alone or not.

Sounds ok to me unless the children are very irresponsible.

I actually never said it was okay for them to be left without a phone, I just think you're massively over-estimating how useful a phone would be in a case where a child is trapped in a room due to (in your own words) fumes, smoke and flames.

As with everything, it's about risk. The likelihood of your home bursting into flames while your nine year old sits and watches TV is so small as to be almost zero. Of course I would leave a child with a phone, but if there was really a fire that was so bad they couldn't get out of the door, the chances are that they wouldn't be able to make a phone call either.

Yes, the comment I was reacting to was terrible, wasn't it?

I never did it, because I have terrible anxiety, but it’s not illegal-as long as they’re not left at risk.

https://www.lemonde.fr/en/intimacy/article/2024/07/18/in-germany-children-go-to-school-alone-but-with-their-gps-trackers_6688643_310.html

I used to leave mine for short periods at similar ages, they were pretty sensible though