To think wtf? Me and ex finished end of November & he's having Xmas dinner with a girl in a restaurant? Ahah

Many people “check out” of a relationship a good few months before the relationship actually ends. My ex and I (unbeknownst to each other at the time), didn’t feel anything romantic for each other for around 12 months before we split up. We were both waiting for the spark to come back but it never did.

You could say we both moved on very quickly, we were both going on dates within a month or so of him moving out, but it felt like we’d been single for a year so didn’t feel too soon at all.

My cousin dumped her boyfriend of 6 years on Christmas and by mid-jan was on holiday in Italy with a new guy. She and new guy now have 2 kids and are getting married 🤷‍♀️ whatever makes people happy I think.

(Move on!!!)

Very odd you're so interested in what he's doing.

Are they married ?
It's not clear.

How long long were you together for if it was years I can understand you being upset ,if it was a few weeks you need to move on
And not everyone you don't like is a,Narcissist

@Howisitnotobvious
The op doesn’t say he is her husband.

Having feelings about your ex moving on and spending part of a holiday you expected to be together with someone else is totally normal. That doesn’t mean anyone did anything wrong or that we shouldn’t be trying to work past any ugly feelings that come up instead of reveling in them.

If a woman posted on here that their bf had left in November and now they suddenly found themselves without Christmas plans and they didn’t want to sit at home alone, people would tell them to see if they knew anyone else without plans anywho wanted to have a nice meal instead of being lonely.

OP, I hope you’ve made other plans of your own so you’re not sitting at home alone on Christmas either. Block or mute your ex and focus on putting him behind you.

He isn't doing anything wrong, going out for a meal doesn't indicate anything deep and meaningful, but can see why you're shocked, its hard to see an ex moving on even if splitting up was the right thing to do.

I think it’s the tone of the post that has caused the responses tbh. It’s not expressing upset about an ex moving on quickly. Saying things like I’m offended, it’s hilarious, cheeky bugger and putting a bunch of 😂 emojis.

I don’t get the lack of empathy in the responses to be honest. You haven’t been broken up very long and regardless of what went wrong it’s hurtful to see someone move on so quickly. I see your point. I’m amazed all these other posters would be so unperturbed if it was them.

Only on Mumsnet would no one raise an eyebrow to a marriage ending in one month and someone dating again the following. Of course it's odd. Of course it would create an emotional response.

@NiftyPeachDreamer I wouldn't judge anyone if they wanted to go for dinner with someone after 3 weeks. Who gives a shit as long as they aren't around the kids?

I can understand you are jealous or upset, but it surely isn’t a surprise or anything to say “aha” about?

He is single, as are you. He’s moved on, and when you are ready, so will you.

Well, it’s Christmas, literally everywhere you go now is serving ‘Christmas dinner” so if he meets someone for dinner there’s a high chance it’ll be a Christmas dinner.

Why does it bother you though. He’s single. Is he supposed to spend the whole of Christmas crying into two day old pizza and pining for you?

Some men can’t be alone. She could be any old lump of lard in lipstick and a pretty frock.

Exactly!

And if he is a narcissist remember they literally cannot survive without supply!

You're well out of it, OP. Enjoy Xmas without the narcissist

MN is so bizarre. News flash: In real life people get sad when their ex’s move on quickly and Christmas time can be lonely. These are common and understandable emotions.

It’s not immature to be upset they only broke up in November.

I would assume that he had someone on the go already or in mind at least.

And he clearly didn’t care that much as he’s moved on so quickly!

It’s only natural to feel this way don’t listen to those saying otherwise OP.

Just think yourself lucky. If he is lovebombing her he is leaving you alone!

block and don’t engage or even look at what he is up to. Enjoy yourself and put him Firmly in the rear view.

if he’s really a narc be glad he’s not with you anymore. And forget him

i know it feels awful! I broke up with an ex and he brought a woman to our work do (we worked together) and announced they were getting married two weeks after we broke up. I got tipped off and didn’t attend…turns out she later broke up with him. We are both married to other people and both marriages are going strong at 25+ years. Better things are out there for you!

You sound very immature. Are you spying on him or something?

Because if OP posted that she had broken up 3 weeks ago with a man she had kids with and was dating a man she would be roasted as a bad mother and told that she can’t date anyone until all her kids are adults.

Double standards are well and truly alive.