No present AIBU

Yep. If you let it go once you're in for a life of a box of chocolates from the petrol station. Max.

Oh tbf I'd missed that he said he was going to try today/tomorrow!

Other than that OP does know what she's going to get - either a voucher for nails, or she can pick something herself.

I guess you'll see what happens @Bleedingheartbleedingnose! Hope it all works out okay. 🎄

OP has no idea what she’s got yet. Maybe she should wait and see before she starts complaining.

well he was quick enough to supply his own requests for gifts for OP to get him
If he doesn't want to do gifts, that was the opportunity to state it.

When he buys meals out for you both and trips away together, he is actually getting the benefit - these are things he wants to do, and he is happy to pay for your company.
Have a think - when was the last time he put some thought, time, money, or effort into something that was just for you, not for him and you together?

Just in case this was me, I don't mean that OP should have it out with the guy.

But telling the truth nicely, without any drama, e.g. I'm very disappointed that we discussed gifts and in the end you've not actually bothered to get me anything at all. I've got you things that I hope you will love, and as it stands I'll have nothing to open when everyone else is exchanging gifts. I'll feel silly in front of your family, and left out. No, I don't want to choose something myself, because I can do that anyway, and a voucher at the last minute isn't really a gift. Please don't think I need or want for you to spend loads or get me a huge amount, I'd just like something to open on the day. Next Christmas let's do wish lists with links if you need some suggestions (or whatever works for OP).

What OP really mustn't do now is swallow the disappointment and/or make out she's fine with this level of effort when she isn't.

OP doesn't have to have this talk now, right before Christmas, tbf - if she'd rather, she could talk about it with him in January.

As to your first point, that's true. But people who 'aren't into presents' or 'don't care about receiving gifts' shouldn't then ask for big ticket items or expensive things, should they? Because that's just not on, is it?

Finally, if having a perfectly calm and reasonable talk laying out expectations around gift exchanging results in the other party running a mile...well, they've done OP a favour.

YANBU to be hurt by this.
8 months is unacceptable not to get your partner a present unless agreed.

i honestly wouldn’t give him the expensive gift. I’d give the scarf type only and save the others for a birthday. If he responds badly then it’s a defo LTB for double standards.

but at 8months a conversation should be had around expectations re:gift giving to see if you’re on the same page.

Do you want this to be your life? Every birthday, Valentine’s, mother’s day, christmas etc and zero effort from him? Every time around these holidays there posts on here of women who are sad because their husbands got nothing not even a nice card or flowers. No thanks

It’s unfathomable that a man would ask for specific presents (including an expensive one) from his girlfriend and then not bother to buy her the things she asked for (like a chopping board!).

He is happy to watch you sit like there with zero
presents in front of his parents.

OP, give yourself a gift by telling him you forgot his presents when you arrive at his parents’ house. Just watch his reaction.

How long have you been together?

He's not bad at presents, he openly said he's not bothering getting you a present at all.

Quite often, those that do not about receiving gifts tend not to see the importance for others. I agree it does not mean he does not care about you.

You are in such an early stage and the relationship, you are both still finding your feet. I don’t t agree with the poster who said to lay it out clearly. That would make me run a mile.

What are the other selfish behaviours that he displays?

This has been said before I know but - he's not bad at presents, he simply hasn't bothered.

He may care a bit, just obviously not enough. (I know you said not to keep reiterating, but you seem to bealing excuses for him).

OP, you seem to have posted to vent, rather than actually get a variety of opinion, which is fine of course - but perhaps be upfront about that.

You have posted this, then spent the majority of your comments defending him, but giving no examples of how thoughtful he usually is. You also haven't answered any of the posts asking how long you've been together.

It's quite an odd thread.

This is a good idea. Call them New Year's Eve gifts. That gives him extra time to go shopping, there will probably be sales, too. Then, you exchange gifts together (romantic) and, if he's still fucked it up, bin him off with a clear conscience.

@Bleedingheartbleedingnose I don't think people are saying it to upset you. 💐

Hopefully he will prove that he can fix it and wants to do so. A good man will always step up if given clear, unambiguous messaging.

Haven't RTFT but he's got a damn cheek asking for expensive gifts when he can't be arsed reciprocating. Out of interest, what did he ask for?

He doesn't though

I don't much care about presents so my advice to OP isn't given from the perspective of presents being a big deal. But DH is really thoughtful and good at picking them, which I do really appreciate (and naturally I reciprocate too). He listens to me and cares enough to make the effort.

The issue here isn't necessarily the lack of presents, except that he clearly expects presents from OP and even requested an expensive thing.

It's the principle that matters.

Some people esp adults are much into presents. gobsmacked what some people come up here as a first response.

If everything else is great, it wouldn't bother me at all. total non issue. Maybe shelf gifts next year if it's just causing stress and angst.

Return all your gifts. He wants you to go on Christmas day because he doesn't want to be on his own at home. I wouldn't give him anything