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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this was rather rude?

83 replies

dragonmama13 · 22/12/2024 15:54

So this happened a few hours ago and has me upset till now.

My husband and I were waiting for the bus at the bus stop with two buggies (for 2 and half year old and 2 months old). There were a handful of people ahead of us at the bus stop when we got there. My toddler was being cranky as it was cold and raining. Two busses got cancelled and by the time the third one came, the stop was extremely crowded. When the bus finally arrived, it stopped right ahead of us and the driver signalled us to get on. We were too distracted trying to calm down our toddler to let the passengers ahead of us get on first. An old man at the stop loudly called us "mannerless cunts". This is the first time
I have heard such a language being directed at me. We were so taken aback that couldn't even respond. I am very non confrontational and husband knows this so he kept quiet as well (against his will, he says). We never jump queues, but this was one of those moment in time things where it just happened. The bus was nearly empty so everyone got to sit.

I am still quite upset about the whole thing. For what it's worth I have always let families with little children get ahead of me in queues when traveling alone, so just don't understand why people won't extend the same grace. Does anyone have similar experiences? How did you handle it?

OP posts:
LisaD1 · 22/12/2024 16:08

The man who swore was rude. You were also rude, you’re cranky child does not give you priority over others who were also cold and tired and waiting.

Doliveira · 22/12/2024 16:06

You were too distracted to let people get on the bus. Somebody called out loud the contents of his head. That somebody is an old man, he might be in pain physically , waiting a long while for the bus. I’m sorry it was distressing for you. He wasn’t in the right. Next time though you might consider others as well as yourself. I don’t mean that in a punitive way. If he thought that, I’d guess others were thinking along the same lines.

ueberlin2030 · 22/12/2024 16:06

OK, so you definitely queue jumped but that passenger definitely could have used better words.
Me and DS got screamed at by an older man in Aberdeen one time 'oi you, I was [insert expletives] before you'. He didn't realise that the bus only stopped because I hurried to the front to hail it down - it was one of those stops where loads of buses stop and loads of folk queue, and the driver wouldn't have seen us otherwise! DS was 11 at the time, but he was really shocked how angry and nasty the man was!

UndeniablyGenX · 22/12/2024 16:03

You were a little rude, the man who swore at you was very rude.

cariadlet · 22/12/2024 16:03

You queue jumped which was wrong. But it sounds as if you were distracted, the driver signalled to you and I'm hoping that if anyone gad politely let you know that they were there first, you would have apologised and stepped back.

The man's behaviour was far worse. No excuse for such disgusting language towards you.

Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 22/12/2024 15:59

I have accidentally queue jumped in the past. By genuinely not noticing the person though so a bit different.

How to handle it? I apologised profusely and stepped aside to let them be dealt with first.

Since your incident is over and done with, that's not an option so really all you can do is chalk it up to experience and let it go

You were having a bad day and it caused you to queue jump. They could have been having a bad day that caused them to react badly to you queue jumping.

Is it great? No. Its not. But don't let it carry on bothering you. What's done is done.

Jeschara · 22/12/2024 15:58

Ignore and give no headrace. He is describing himself, he is ignorant as well using that language in front of a child.
Enjoy your Christmas and forget.

ItOnlyTakesTwoMinutes · 22/12/2024 15:56

I wouldn’t let this bother me at all. He’s unhinged.

You were a bit rude but this is all very petty.