Non-binary colleague using disabled toilet

That’s stretching the ‘religion or belief’ characteristic to breaking point. You may as well also say that someone who holds the belief that white people are superior to people of colour is protected under the same law. (And before anyone says it, no, I’m not calling you racist - that was an analogy. I am, though, calling you a bigot.)

This

And as for having a Radar key....why shouldn't they?? I also think the OP is being picky and spiteful and deserved to be threatened with a disciplinary. FFS why does it matter if the person used the customer disabled toilet, as long as there was no one waiting to go in and they didn't queue jump!

Perhaps the OP could suggest to management that the loo door signs are all amended so anyone can use a vacant toilet? If they are single stalls it wouldn't matter would it?

How does this even affect you? They have to go somewhere and really can’t win with this scenario. Honestly, it takes two minutes to have a wee and it’s one person.

Do you really have nothing better, and are so highly prejudiced against trans people that this takes up this much of your time? You really come across as petty and nasty here. Let the poor sod have a wee and get on with your own day.

Oh poor you. You must feel so oppressed! It’s embarrassing for you that you care so much. I’m shocked you even bothered reporting it. Imagine caring so much about what other people choose to do.

The problem is the only toilet disabled people can access because the easy go to for everyone.

The OP mentions about families - unless that family contains a disabled family member they shouldn’t be using it either!

I think you’re being reasonable in feeling concerned about access to the disabled toilet for those who need it most, like elderly customers, people with disabilities, and families with babies. It’s important that these facilities are prioritised for their intended purpose, especially if it’s the only baby-changing facility or accessible toilet available.

However, I also think you’re being unreasonable if you’re not considering why your non-binary colleague might feel they have no other option. They may not feel comfortable using the male toilets because it could feel unsafe or awkward, and using the female toilets might make some female colleagues or customers feel uncomfortable. In this situation, the disabled toilet might feel like the only neutral and safe choice for them.

The real issue here isn’t your colleague’s use of the disabled toilet but rather the lack of an inclusive option, like a gender-neutral toilet. A gender-neutral cubicle could work well if designed properly—with separate handwashing facilities and sanitary products available—so it meets everyone’s needs in a respectful way.

Balancing everyone’s needs is tricky, but I think the best way forward would be to raise the need for better facilities with management. This would allow your non-binary colleague to feel safe and respected while ensuring that the disabled toilet and nappy changing facility remains accessible for those who rely on it.

Ah, you're one of THOSE people. So presumably every lesbian is a stereotypical butch, short haired, non-make-up wearing, male dressing person who acts aggressively? And every homosexual wears pastel colours and acts like Julian Clary?

Not at all, what makes you think that? Being gay isn't a made up identitiy, it's a sexual orientation.
The rest is just personality.

I find funny some saying the non binary is attention seeker, because as far as we know nobody but OP cared about the bathroom incident, which makes it look like OP is the one seeking attention.

Also, who to says they're not actually disabled? I honestly doubt OP really knows since they're already pretty clearly against the person, you don't go out of your way to cause problems to someone you like or is apathetic to.

I can't see that this is anything to do with you at all, OP.

Unless they are like an hour at a time in the toilet why do you care? If they nip in to pee than why not just turn the other way. Everyone can wait a moment for the bathroom.

All the single occupancy loos at my work at available for any sex/gender. All have sanitary bins. Most of my colleagues seem to be able to use the loo without creating squalor.

If disabled people are having to wait because your colleague is using the disabled loo, they should request all staff loos become gender-free. Problem solved.

If you'd have said this in the OP then I wouldn't have voted against you. I'm all for brevity, but not at the cost of vital information.

They use the correct bathroom of their gender I.e the genitals they have the chromosomes they have. Male uses male and female uses female.

I guess it is better then them using the wrong toilet and making others uncomfortable.

Women’s toilets no longer for women. Disabled toilets no longer for those with disabilities. Mentioning this theft gets silenced.

who is in charge?!

Ah, you're one of THOSE people. So presumably every lesbian is a stereotypical butch, short haired, non-make-up wearing, male dressing person who acts aggressively? And every homosexual wears pastel colours and acts like Julian Clary?

I've known non-binary people over the years, both male and female, young and old. In fact I've met more male than female I think. I don't think I've met any who have self harmed, and most have tended towards the slimmer side of things. I'd take a guess that most non-binary people would much prefer you NOT to know they feel that way, as they've already worked out that you're a judgemental arse.

And before you suggest otherwise, I'm a very hetero woman but also gender critical in general.

Isn't the key issue that employees shouldn't be using customer facilities?

However, as the colleague has a Radar key, is this a known workplace exemption?

I've yet to meet a single human being who isn't non-binary, in practice. I wish we had a healthier society, one in which young women were told that they didn't need to invent special identities becaus the whole fillers, fake boobs and arse, instagram/porn filtered aesthetic is horrific to them.

But sex is binary, One either has one set of organs or the other.
Surely this is a performance or attention seeking.
Disabled facilities should not be taken over by such people.

Unless they spend hours in the toilet, it doesn't affect other users anymore than if any other person was using it.

Honestly, I couldn't get worked up about it and frankly, when I am at work, don't have the head space to police who uses which toilet.

At my work we have 'male' and 'female' single cubicle toilets - all of which are accessible for disabled people too. On my floor, people often use the 'wrong' toilet if the other one is being used and they don't have much time (teachers so can't go whenever). It doesn't bother anyone.

I'll try give a different approach to this situation.

First of all lets talk about the reality of trans and non binary.

Fact is a lot of people are unconfortable with trans using the bathroom of their choice, you can include non binary on this.

Fact is a lot of people is unconfortable with trans using the bathroom of their birth sex.

Fact is a non binary people might feel unconfortable in a gendered bathroom, be because they don't want it, or be because they fear how other people will feel about them in there.

In short, a lot of time someone trans or non binary simply can't win in a situation like this, because anythingn they do might be considered wrong.

Now, I agree with some people that someome not disabled shouldn't use the bathroom for disabled people, but really, it's one person, they won't really get in the way of disabled people who need to use the bathroom.

I feel this issue is unreasonable, it's pretty clearly not about the disabled bathroom at all, it's about them being non binary.

Use the appropriate toilet based on their sex. When new buildings are built they factor in how many of each type of toilet are required. If people with disabilities are now having to wait twice as long because non disabled people are routinely using their toilets for no better reason than they think they're really very special, it's completely unfair and detrimental to their quality of life.

Absolutely this. Why the actual should a disabled person wait while their facilities are being used by someone pretending not to be the sex they are?

Accessible toilets are for those who can't access the regular facilities for whatever reason. Being non binary is as good a reason as many.

As a bona fida disabled person I don't think it would bother me, especially in a workplace where the pressure on the facility isnt likely to be that great. At my workplace the accessible toilet is used by anyone if the male/female toilets are taken. I'm pretty sure there are only 2 of us who actually need to use it, and I can access the toilet in the shower room at a push.

Whether PPs like it or not, gender reassignment (including identifying as non-binary) is a protected characteristic in the UK, so your outdated views will, I hope, one day be viewed in the same way as racism and homophobia are today.

So is being gender critical.

YABU.

Disabled toilets are designed to be accessible for disabled people. This doesn't mean able bodied people can't or shouldn't use them.