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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is this enough for Christmas??

320 replies

FootballGrump · 21/12/2024 23:44

Every year, “Father Christmas” brings our children one gift. One gift only… it could be a scooter or a lego set or a Tonybox or similar, they are still young and their taste is not extravagant.
Both sets of grandparents also get one gift per child that goes under the tree, typically something smaller (a dolly, a toy car etc).
In total, each child will have 3 or max 4 gifts to open on Christmas day. One “main” gift plus 2-3 smaller ones from close relatives. Plus a stocking full of bits and bobs.

We think this is ample and our children are delighted with it. Most people these days seem to spoil their children way more so I guess my AIBU is regarding what to do now my eldest is aware enough to start comparing with friends.
Some friends have hinted they think we don’t give our children enough toys.
I disagree, I think they are very fortunate and I already feel they don’t have enough respect for their toys (breaking things, losing the small parts, not putting stuff away). I remember being really attached to my toys and treasuring them, I would like to see more of that in our household.

OP posts:
Original poster
FootballGrump · 21/12/2024 23:57

SwanRivers · 21/12/2024 23:55

Buy more shit then if you think it'll make them happy? 🤷‍♀️

That's what your friends are doing with their DC.

Show quote history

🙄
I guess you’re not on this thread to be helpful 😂

OP posts:
KittyPup · 21/12/2024 23:57

It’s miserable because Christmas for us is about the joy and excitement. It’s like no other day of the year where they can make wishes and actually see them come true. They can also squeal in excitement at the surprises under the tree and the anticipation of what it’s going to be. Mine look forward to Christmas for months. Yours does just sound like a pretty average day with a couple of new bits which is pretty sad tbh.

hattie43 · 21/12/2024 23:56

Well it's not much is it OP.
Where's the excitement of a big pile of presents .

SwanRivers · 21/12/2024 23:55

FootballGrump · 21/12/2024 23:53

I’m not here to slag people off. Genuinely curious.
Also getting to the point where we don’t have many Christmases left, (or at least not many with the children still believing Father Christmas exists) so I’m keen not to miss anything I’d regret later.

Show quote history

Buy more shit then if you think it'll make them happy? 🤷‍♀️

That's what your friends are doing with their DC.

TotallyTwisted · 21/12/2024 23:55

Assuming you don't have money worries, I think it's a bit mean to give your own child a single present and a stocking. Half a dozen or so small presents wouldn't be a huge pile but would be more in the spirit of Christmas.

bridgetreilly · 21/12/2024 23:55

I also don’t really believe that children compare the numbers of presents they get.

bridgetreilly · 21/12/2024 23:54

Of course it’s not miserable. It’s a good number of things that they can actually enjoy and play with rather than forget about completely in the midst of a huge orgy of present opening. Materialistic children who are taught that love correlates to piles and piles of stuff will be much more miserable in the end.

Silvertulips · 21/12/2024 23:54

I agree with you. But I get mine things they need sock knickers new pjs and then chocolate treats - things I’d buy anyway only wrapped in a stocking.

Kids do have too much these days and it’s great now mine are older and appreciate tradition over gifts.

2 haven’t asked for anything!

GrumpyWombat · 21/12/2024 23:54

Also you must be unsure of your decision if you are posting here?

Floralnomad · 21/12/2024 23:54

If you and your children are happy then that’s fine , it wouldn’t work for me

Original poster
FootballGrump · 21/12/2024 23:53

SwanRivers · 21/12/2024 23:51

I disagree, I think they are very fortunate and I already feel they don’t have enough respect for their toys (breaking things, losing the small parts, not putting stuff away). I remember being really attached to my toys and treasuring them, I would like to see more of that in our household.

What's the point of this thread then?

To get everyone to slag off parents who give their kids more, under the thin veil of "What shall I do now my eldest is old enough to compare to friends"?

Just do you and yours and other will do their own thing.

I’m not here to slag people off. Genuinely curious.
Also getting to the point where we don’t have many Christmases left, (or at least not many with the children still believing Father Christmas exists) so I’m keen not to miss anything I’d regret later.

OP posts:
GrumpyWombat · 21/12/2024 23:53

If they are happy with what they get then that’s great. I wonder if as they get older they will realise that most other children do get more than that?

MaMoosie · 21/12/2024 23:52

Just sounds really shit tbh.

Original poster
FootballGrump · 21/12/2024 23:51

ForFunAmberDeer · 21/12/2024 23:48

Sounds utterly miserable

Could you elaborate a bit please?
Why do you think it’s miserable?
I’m genuinely curious and posting here to understand other perspectives.

OP posts:
Commonsense22 · 21/12/2024 23:51

It sounds perfect. You're giving a sizeable gift and there are additional ones plus stockings.

We're the same except we receive more additional gifts from relatives and friends. This will definitely reduce with age.
Most of our friends do the same.

I just can't fathom the quantity if things people list as higting their children on here. Do they live in mansions to store it all, to start with? We struggle enough.

SwanRivers · 21/12/2024 23:51

I disagree, I think they are very fortunate and I already feel they don’t have enough respect for their toys (breaking things, losing the small parts, not putting stuff away). I remember being really attached to my toys and treasuring them, I would like to see more of that in our household.

What's the point of this thread then?

To get everyone to slag off parents who give their kids more, under the thin veil of "What shall I do now my eldest is old enough to compare to friends"?

Just do you and yours and other will do their own thing.

scorpiogirly · 21/12/2024 23:50

I don't agree with spoiling children but this seems odd to me. DDs dad and I are separated and we both buy our own gifts. This year we have gone in together on a Nintendo Switch. As well as this, I have bought her about 8 extra gifts averaging between £10 and £20. He usually gets the same if not more. I'm not saying this is the right way at all, but anything else would feel "not enough for me".

ManchesterLu · 21/12/2024 23:48

I think it depends what the "bits and bobs" are in the stocking. IMO a main present, plus things to keep them occupied during the Christmas holidays (board game, arts and crafts etc), is perfect - along with practical things. Maybe like clothes that they'd need anyway, and use Christmas as an opportunity to wrap them up.

I really hate "something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read" shit, but it's close to what I actually think kids should get.

ForFunAmberDeer · 21/12/2024 23:48

Sounds utterly miserable

Whattochoose1 · 21/12/2024 23:46

Absolutely wish I'd taken my own advice on this. Which is to have done exactly what you have said.
I can confirm I have not and they have a stack of stuff each - nothing expensive really (they're only little) but far too much.