No Christmas card from my baby

In a nice way, I think YABU. Although, my partner sulked for 3 days last year when I didn’t get him one from the baby (but he prefers cards over presents and got me some from the baby). Me personally, I’m not that bothered. That said, he may well present one to you on Christmas Day-there’s still time!

Has the world gone completely mad?

Ok so personally, I think it's a funny thing to insist upon. A memento, like a photo-based ornament commemorating your first Christmas as a mum, maybe. But a purchased card from Tesco with the word Mum on it which is actually from your husband, is a bit odd, imo.

However, my feelings aren't the point. If I'd told my DH that I wanted something as simple as a card he could purchase from Tesco in minutes, he'd be thrilled that it was such an easy request and he'd be on it.

So, YANBU. You've told him what you want and how important it is, and he's ignored it. I'm sorry.

(Have you already exchanged gifts? We don't even do cards between us but if we did, we wouldn't be doing them until Christmas day)

Buy a card, write what you want in it - done and dusted. Lesson I learned in life is not to be needy.

Has he told you he hasn't got you one, or has he just not given you one yet?

If you know he hasn't got one, despite you asking and him saying he would, that's very different to you assuming he hasn't.

If you think he's forgotten then tell him you've got his daddy card, and it's so cute you can't wait for him to open it on Christmas Day. Either you'll then know he's got one cos he'll say "I've got yours too, it's cute!" Or he'll remember he was supposed to and go get you one.

However, it's just a card, you are the thing with "mum" written all over it, and you aren't just for Christmas.

Honestly, just remind him. After 7 years of being a Mum, I still forget to buy certain cards. I’m so use to getting the ones for our Mum and Dads, to your house from ours etc but you can guarantee I’ll nearly forget a Son and Daughter one before walking out of the shop…then I get home and realise I’ve forgotten a card for their Dad and Grandparent cards 🤦🏽‍♀️. Even when you’re use to it you can forget. He probably isn’t being as thoughtless as you think, he’s never had to get one before and needs a nudge.

Is this a wind up?

You can buy one from baby to you
You can buy a bauble baby s first Christmas
Or go with dh to Tesco and tell him there and then to chose one
You can buy a photo session for all three of you to get the family photo

Men can be rubbish with gifts and cards. Can you remind him how important it is to you? I made sure I reminded my husband that I wanted a mother's day card from our son for my first mother's day. Not that I didn't trust him but just as a gentle reminder

Why assume he hasn't sorted it out though? Christmas would be the obvious day for it to be given.

I suppose OP could say "have you sorted the Christmas card yet? Sorry if I wasn't clear but I was hoping to receive and display it before Christmas".

If he knows it means a lot to you he is being inconsiderate. Just remind him by saying you can't wait to get your Xmas card from your baby. It might prompt him to sort it out.

Do you give each other Christmas presents ?
if so

when

Christmas day I guess

do you give each other birthday presents ?
and when do you give them ?
on the birthday I suspect, along with a birthday card ?

so surely you will get your Christmas card on Christmas day...

For those who do exchange Christmas cards with immediate family members who they live with, I'd guess you'd do that on Christmas Day itself, no?

No on all counts, nor did my parents give them to each other (or to me while I lived with them), nor either set of grandparents to each other (though they did to their adult children and to me).

You have never given your kids/partner a Xmas card? Never received one?

I had no idea giving Christmas cards to someone you live with is a thing, let alone "from" babies!

But fair enough, you would like one and have asked for one.

But why on earth would you assume that he hasn't got you one? Every chance you get in on Christmas day, surely?

And even if he hasn't, the "doesn't care" conclusion is extremely overdramatic unless there's significant backstory.

It's all very odd....

The first point I've already said in my post....

the second point is that she has got him a card which she hasn't given him (not sure why not) but he hasn't, as far as we know, expressed any interest in having one.

Personally I'd give him the card she's bought and wait and see what happens.

Honestly, give it a few years and you’ll be knee deep in pictures, models, cards, baking, pottery and Lego. All actually made by your child, and given to you by your child. I think you need to toughen up a bit on this one.

@BigBoysDontCry surely the point is that Christmas is 4 days away so there's no proof he hasn't gotten one and OP also hasn't given her card to her other half either.

Surely the point here isn't whether we think it's something that we would want or expect or even something that the OP has expected her OH to randomly come up with.

She's used her words and made a fairly simple and cheap request and feels that he hasn't fulfilled it (though he may have for all anyone knows...) and is upset that she's been ignored (potentially).

She's not asked for diamond earrings, a new car or a rare object. It's surely not much more than her OH saying he'd really like chicken for dinner on his birthday and it would be pretty unkind of her to plan lasagne. Could he organise his own chicken? of course but there is nothing nicer than someone taking note of something and making the effort to do it when you know that they would really appreciate it.

When Mother's Day comes, that's surely when you will receive a card with Mum on it, or Mummy or whatever you have chosen to be known as.

Are you sleep deprived? Becouse this sounds a bit bonkers. I never knew this was even a thing…. Maybe do something else to mark your first Christmas as mum? A photo shoot?

As a family, cards are only written to people who we won't see over Christmas. I would never have expected a Christmas card from a child who not only lived in the same house as me but who was too young to know what day it was.

Disagree, husband giving OP a card from baby isn't a measure of how much he cares.
This could come across as being unreasonably demanding and unreasonable.
Congratulations to OP and husband on the first Christmas with their special baby

I think some men just don't value cards. Mine doesn't. It isn't personal. One year I got my anniversary card months late (he had bought it but forgot to write it and didn't want to because we were going through a tough patch due to mh and a newborn).

Make sure he knows how upset you are and make sure he gets you a mum thing for Christmas or a card for bday, mother's day etc