To be dreading the holiday

Pinky Flamingo, I had children with a useless man , thousands of women do because at the time we didn't know how they were going to be in a family setting. It usually works out well in the end. Your comment doesn't had anything to the this thread. It's meaningless and mean spirited.

I honestly cannot understand this. Mine weren't in day nursery as I was a sahm, both have sn so had specialist very pt preschool places from 2. You learn to manage 2 small children 2 years apart, you learn to manage their health needs, their behaviours, and quite frankly you make their dad play their part. There weren't all these paid for activities and I can't help but think kids today are over stimulated, they aren't learning how to manage their own time due to full time nursery (needed due to work) then parents arranging activities for the remainder of the week. I got my first "break" once the younger started preschool which was 90 mins and we watched through those special mirrors! Looking back it wasn't easy but I did need to accept the mess and let them have free play in the house and yes risk the park, only had to go to a&e twice.

I meant don't let the mess put you off.
Eg dens make a mess but can stay up for a few days until the kids get bored.

No point sitting in a pristine house going crazy!

Another woman having kids with a useless man.

I get it. This time last year I would have said the same but now one DC is in school and I’m looking forward to it. It gets easier as they get older. It’s easier in the summer as well there’s a lot more places to go, winter is expensive.

Do you have friends with children you can meet up with? Share the load.

Also can I ask what you have booked for after Christmas please as I need ideas?

@nonotchristmas oh how the hell did we ever manage back in the days before soft plays came into being??? we couldnt afford things like that! if we went swimming (hard to find nowadays in my area!), then we could do nothing costly for the rest of the week! I personally think soft play areas are more stressful than going to a park!!!

I'm sorry you are feeling stressed and down.

Ignore any judgey comments - your children are very young and at that age, kids are bloody hard work! I only have one who is now 11 and an absolute dream, but I found the under 4 years stage so bloody hard!

Like yours, his attention span wasn't great and he needed entertaining.

Lots of good suggestions on here already, so apologies if I repeat any.

Could you take them swimming? Most council pools will be open except for the main holiday days. I know that might seem like hard work and it does depend if they like water, but it's generally fairly cheap and will tire them out. I used to take ds in the morning and then he would be calmer in the afternoon.

Definitely embrace soft play - I know it's grim for adults but kids like it, you can get a brew and it's mess and noise somewhere that isn't your house.

Some libraries also have a few toys/colouring bits so definitely see if they are open - again, we were regulars at ours. DS loved the books/toys/colouring and it was out of the house.

If you can afford to, take them to a supermarket cafe for lunch/tea - my ds still loves tesco cafe 😂😂 kids meals are usually fairly cheap and you can either eat or just grab a drink/cake. Again, keeps them entertained/fed/mess not at your house (see the theme emerging here 😂)

Basically, I used to aim to do something out of the house every day - cheap if possible or free - we have bridle ways near us - if you have paths locally, use those, let both walk but take buggy for when youngest gets tired.

Good luck!

Perhaps I have rose coloured glasses, I adored having tiny children it was the best time of parenting by far.

Sadly my teens don't want to get out the glitter or glue. 😭

I hardly ever took my DC anywhere you had to pay. I don't understand how you need to pay for everything.

Are you very inner city so the parks and pavements aren't clean?

I get it OP - you've already had lots of good ideas but a couple more for the list:
If you have a travel cot, get a couple of packs of the soft play balls and empty them in.
Roll of wallpaper lining paper for endless colouring, craft, draw round each other type stuff.
Get to the Works and stock up on craft things
Charity shops for puzzles, bricks etc
Definitely film and TV - its not lazy if you are turning it into a "thing" with snacks and duvet etc
Good old fashioned reading them a story
Swimming if you can handle it is brilliant for tiring them out
Go and walk round different neighbourhoods looking at Xmas lights
Definitely puddle suits, wellies and woolies to get out regardless of weather
Pine cone collecting and decorating - glitter ands PVA glue is your friend

Sorry, that was more than a couple but I'll add one more. Tell DH to shape up or piss off. I'm a SP and though it is hard, I don't have to cope with resentment and annoyance about what their dad should have been doing but wasn't.

They sound very energetic, could you devise some sort of soft obstacle challenge throughout the house
Hide and seek
Make a den/ blanket fort

Outdoor bingo - make bingo cards using envelopes with different nature things you could see on a walk. Doesn't have to be fancy, I used to write on backs of used envelopes and they'd collect leaves, sticks to put in the envelopes.

Don't worry about the mess, do whatever it takes to keep them entertained.

It's hard when the kids are small. They are whiney and it's hard to entertain them for long. My son used to be so hard to entertain as a toddler. Some days we'd have gone to five different parks, softplay, done arts and crafts, played with toys, sensory play, build a fort and I'd look at the clock and it would be 3pm. My son is now 6 and today he wants to watch christmas movies, bake then go to Costa for a hot chocolate! You really need to be assertive and get your dh to do his part. Don't just accept his laziness even if you have to say I've booked a slot for softplay you can bring the children while I have a bath and read a book!

There's more to do than any other time of year and loads of it is free. Only time things are closed is Christmas day. And the weather is pretty good for this time of year.

Some people have a talent for being miserable, no matter what.

Do they like doing stuff at home? Making a gingerbread house for example or a treasure hunt around the house.

Various soft plays to mix it up. Some have little pretend towns in as well which is a break from just climbing up and sliding down.

Mini farms.

Swimming if you have another adult to help.

Local gymnastics places might run preschool sessions, ours do.

Round here the light trails are all running until 5 Jan so that's an option for late afternoon.

Get the bus / train somewhere, have lunch out, come home - although last time I did that we had to get a taxi home because the bus was going to be another hour.

I feel your pain - similar situation though a more present DH. Some ideas (these are all designed to give you a break - lots of great ideas on here about what you could do with them as well):

big boxes if you have them, Hobbycraft ‘colour in’ pirate ship / houses if not, and a tub of pens - usually gets me half an hour’s peace

’painting’ outside with washing up brushes and water and chalks

make a fort out of tables, chairs and blankets and let them take all their books and toys in - a nightmare to clean up, but they usually do spend a lot of time in there

set up ‘stations’ of eg Lego, vehicles, trains so they can freely move to structured things, can buy you some time

give their soft toys a bath - loads of bubbles to keep it interesting (then just chuck toys in washing machines)

washing up / cleaning the kitchen - washing up bowl of Fairy and water with their plastic plates to wash and a spray bottle of water and a cloth for them to ‘clean’ cupboards

most importantly, give yourself a break - set expectations with DH that he’ll eg watch them eat dinner so you can take half an hour up in your room. You can do this!

Haha, there's no way I would watch someone else's children if I was already finding my own challenging 🤣

At least OP is being honest in a forum where support and solidarity is needed. Not criticism.

I look back and did have that feeling of dread years ago too. I don't now as they are all at least school aged. But have two with additional needs which comes with different challenges...

Easy to cast stones for some on here I suppose...

If your kids love big gross motor soft play type activities I'd invest in stuff for home.

You can buy an indoor trampoline, some big soft bricks, tunnel, play tent etc.
I use to have a big ball pool thing that doubles up as a paddling pool in summer.

Also puddle suits/ wellies and they can do it outside too. I'm for a bath which if they stay in it an hour - brilliant!

It's awful when you feel in the relentless negative cycle and are so tired so I'd spend the money on getting what you can for home so at least you can sit with a coffee on the sofa whilst they play.

Do you have a local friend with same age kids? Could you do a deal they have both yours for a morning you have theirs?