This bloody dog will be the death of me

My niece's two sprockers found, and ate, some marijuana that had been dumped in the woods where she walked them. Both needed emetics and IV fluids.

OP when I read your first post I thought you were talking about a DH or DP who’d had one too many down the pub (clearly didn’t read title)

But then when I realised it was your dog I am sorry to say I had a little chuckle- he sounds like a real character. But so sorry you’re going through this!

Ate the contents of a tube of ultramarine blue watercolour paint and then danced around the house decorating freely wherever he felt like.

Luckily non toxic.

My Cocker cost us over a grand before he was even two years old.
Pinched a lamb kebab out the fridge when my back was turned and swallowed it whole(six inch wooden skewer included)
kebabs banned and fridge rearranged.
He runs off with everything he can grab,slippers,socks,tv remote,books,cushions,pens!!!
He can and does jump up onto the worktops and his new fave is the coffee pods!
I love the bones of him.

My Ddog is generally non destructive. But she does have a thing for earplugs, especially used ones. Her dog sitter rang me in a panic once to say Ddog had just eaten a pair of used foam earplugs and I explained it was fine, if I don’t put mine away she always eats them and I don’t know until I’m picking them up in her poo. We agreed she must view them as a tasty snack.

He had to be rehomed after DH had to remove the miniature daschund from him one Sunday lunchtime!

He was eating him?

I'm always wary of meat found on walks. There's semi-regular sausages on a green near us. Not sure if it's a neighbour feeding foxes, or poisoning foxes so we have to be on sausage watch when we go that way to steer him away.

My Nan had a dog like that called ‘piss quick’ he had a wee everytime he saw you😂

My late brothers old spaniel ate (in no particular order): string of onions, father’s sheepskin coat, the crotch area of 7 pairs of men’s trousers hanging to air after being cleaned, a hole in the back door, part of an indestructible dog basket and the rolls of film from our wedding waiting to go to be developed. He had to be rehomed after DH had to remove the miniature daschund from him one Sunday lunchtime!

Sorry chuckling here🤭. Bad for the wallet just before Christmas. But least he's ok. Definitely channelling his lab side. I want to know how the hell he reached the side!! We have a new rescue & his petty thievery knows no bounds. Waltzed in yesterday with whole loaf of bread wrapper & all, that he'd reached from off the top of the microwave! He is a big dog, but I was amazed. He is adorable but, now everything is put in a cupboard... On a plus point the house looks much tidier 😂🤣

A former rescue dog came home with a cooked leg of lamb, still hot. Nearest neighbour was half a mile away, we never asked if they’d lost one.
Another time she and her partner in crime brought an entire deers head, complete with antlers, presumably poachers had killed one 🫣

My golden retriever is 11 months old and I have to watch her like a hawk. Family round this weekend and she’s been tied to either me or dh on a lead, or tucked up in her crate, or fuck knows what she would have taken the opportunity to have swiped by now.

She said hello to dh brother for 5 seconds and had one of his gloves in her mouth.

I'm sorry, the bill is eye-watering but almost worth it for the comic genius.

My dog is a jack Russel chihuahua cross and the biggest God damn knobhead known to men. I have to feed the cats on worktops because she will risk life and limb to get at it. She stole their pilchards a few weeks vag and cost me £500 in meds and vet visits because she is apparently allergic to them and spent 4 weeks sitting everywhere.

She has developed vertigo which infinity hysterical given she is only about 8 inches off the floor 🤣🤣

The vet described her as being drunk and disorderly

They are utter picks but we love them.

Mine is 16...so also old enough to know better

my childhood dog ate a box of crayons once, rainbow speckled shit. Also a whole flannel, that went through and we only realised she’d eaten it when it came out.

my current dog cost us £600 recently after eating some rotten fish she found on a walk (don’t ask me how or why a rotten fish was in a bush).

My DDog once ate an entire tub of large cod liver oil tablets, I was braced for the aftermath but surprisingly nothing dreadful happened. His coat was beautiful though

My dog, yes, a lab, ate a hot cross bun last year so Off to the emergency vet we went. It was only afterwards I remembered that if I’m not careful, he would help himself to my muesli, with no ill effects

Hot cross buns and muesli no longer purchased.

He’s also a bin raider.

I love Simon!

Our Lab ate 12 mince pies (plus foils) one year. I had them in my bag to take to my class (he ate through the packet). My fault really but the vet kept saying ‘12!’ I was crying. Cost about £800 to make him vomit and then put him on a drip.

I know you can’t tell which dogs will have a reaction to raisins. Therefore you can’t take any risk. Though I suspect after that amount he is not one of the dogs who are allergic..

I love Simon. That face! I’ve just had to show DH his picture. 🤣🤣

One of mine specialises in long grass, and then gets very uncomfortable with it sticking out of her bum,so I have to pull it out. If you see me in the park pulling long grass out of a dogs bum, please say nothing and go throw up away, far away in case my dog eats it.

Ours eats DD's long hair then her poo comes out like a string of sausages but doesn't come out easily so we have to gently pull it otherwise it just hangs. Having DDogs is an absolute joy isn't it?

Awe, made me laugh, he is the cutest. We had a cavalier that snaffled a whole box of quality street once at Christmas, this was back in the eighties, we didn't know that chocolate was toxic to dogs. She wasn't even sick FFS, perfectly fine . She even got the wrappers off fuck knows how, the other dog just sat facing the wall when we came home as if to say nowt to do with me lol

🤣🤣

We had a cat flap-and a nosy springer. We now have a dog flap, after she got her head and shoulders through it and broke it off.

.

happy to say that this is not my dog but it does live within a few miles of us!! 😂

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