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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband's cousin has called their son the same name as our son.

368 replies

shoulde · 20/12/2024 19:38

Bit annoying considering they also share the same surname!

I know no one owns a name, but it's pretty annoying.

Aibu?

OP posts:
Original poster
shoulde · 20/12/2024 19:54

Butchyrestingface · 20/12/2024 19:51

I would find it hard to get worked up over second cousins sharing the same name(s). They will likely also share the same forename and surname with others too, given the planetary population of circa 8 billion.

No one has our surname. It's not at all common

OP posts:
tilypu · 20/12/2024 19:54

Op, if the cousin had been born first, would you have chosen a different name? Just curious. It sounds like you maybe would have, so maybe you weren't particularly set on the name?

Many people know what they want to call their children years before they plan to have them. There can be loads of reasons why. I don't think my child having a second cousin with that name would be enough to change my mind in that circumstance.

NeedSomeComfy · 20/12/2024 19:54

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
(yabu).

Namesy · 20/12/2024 19:52

YANBU. I think it's weird. It would be weirder if your son's first cousin was called the exact same name, but I still think it's odd that two children very close in age from the same family have the same name. That means someone has great grandchildren with the same name.

fanaticalfairy · 20/12/2024 19:52

How much will you see them?

Goldengirl123 · 20/12/2024 19:52

Don’t be ridiculous

TrainsCarsBoat · 20/12/2024 19:51

If it was his brother I could understand the annoyance but couldn't get worked up about a cousin using the same name.

Unless you live in the same street or they'll be in the same school year, it's not likely they'll be confused for the other. Also depends on the name - if it's very out there or super unusual, you could have more of a point.

Butchyrestingface · 20/12/2024 19:51

I would find it hard to get worked up over second cousins sharing the same name(s). They will likely also share the same forename and surname with others too, given the planetary population of circa 8 billion.

kierenthecommunity · 20/12/2024 19:50

There’s cousins and cousins. If they’re super close like best friends and see each other every weekend cousins, then it’s a bit odd having two children with the same name in that set up. If it’s a cousin he sees once a year then not so much.

Tandora · 20/12/2024 19:50

YABU. It’s traditional in families for people to share names. No big deal

ComtesseDeSpair · 20/12/2024 19:50

Are you a particularly close family? Is your DS going to have any kind of significant relationship with his second cousin? Once he’s an adult, will they even know the other exists? Sharing the same name with a distant relative you barely see really isn’t going to be any problem at all.

MumonabikeE5 · 20/12/2024 19:50

This seems like a non issue.

nellythe · 20/12/2024 19:49

I don’t see an issue, I’m afraid!

anon2022anon · 20/12/2024 19:48

How often does he see them/ how close are the cousins? If they see each other weekly, weird. If it's once a year at a family party, then not strange at all, and just as likely to get the same name in school.
There were 3 non related girls with exactly the same name in my secondary school year group, 2 of which were born on boxing day, so shared the same birthday and probably place of birth.

Original poster
shoulde · 20/12/2024 19:47

No, first cousin once removed from my husband, second cousins to each other. Sorry.

OP posts:
Original poster
shoulde · 20/12/2024 19:46

samarrange · 20/12/2024 19:42

Your DH's cousin's child is your child's second cousin. How big a deal is that, really? I would have to sit down and think very hard to even count how many second cousins our kids have.

They're first cousins once removed

OP posts:
Dulra · 20/12/2024 19:45

shoulde · 20/12/2024 19:43

It is weird!

Show quote history

It's never been an issue at all ever, she's a few years older and we are very different looks and personality wise. Never felt it was weird. So no in my opinion it's not, in yours it is

ARichtGoodDram · 20/12/2024 19:44

Is it a family name?

It’s really not long since it was incredibly common for cousins to have the same family names.

AlbertCamusflage · 20/12/2024 19:44

YABVVU, unless the name is something very very unusual.

Stormyweatheroutthere · 20/12/2024 19:44

Well they are the ones lacking imagination...

georgepigg · 20/12/2024 19:44

StormingNorman · 20/12/2024 19:40

On MN nobody owns a name. In the real world it’s fucking weird and annoying that they didn’t choose a different name.

Completely agree, but this is Mumsnet 😅

Original poster
shoulde · 20/12/2024 19:43

AppleDumplings · 20/12/2024 19:43

There are 8 people in my family with the same name. 8. Edited to clarify I only share my surname with 4 of them 😂

Edited

That's weird

OP posts:
Original poster
shoulde · 20/12/2024 19:43

Dulra · 20/12/2024 19:42

My cousin has the same name as me, she's older so I i must ask my mum what her sil thought when she named me. I have never considered it weird

It is weird!

OP posts:
AppleDumplings · 20/12/2024 19:43

There are 8 people in my family with the same name. 8. Edited to clarify I only share my surname with 4 of them 😂

samarrange · 20/12/2024 19:42

Your DH's cousin's child is your child's second cousin. How big a deal is that, really? I would have to sit down and think very hard to even count how many second cousins our kids have.

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