Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask about options in cars for kids who won’t stay in booster seats?

146 replies

Nosnowjustrainandwind · 20/12/2024 16:34

DS will not stay in his. Just won’t. Tried absolutely everything in terms of punishment, explaining he could die, everything. Still does it.

So now since we do have to use the car I need other options. I can put him back in his old car seat for now but there will come a time I physically can’t and what do I do then? (He’s 4.)

OP posts:
cestlavielife · 20/12/2024 19:59

Crelling harness.

nellythe · 20/12/2024 19:57

Ah well, back to a 5 point harness seat. Shame he’ll look childish to his friends outside school! Have you tried explaining that big boys don’t need to be strapped in like a little boy but if he can’t be big you’ll have to get him a baby seat again?
It sounds painful!

Original poster
Nosnowjustrainandwind · 20/12/2024 19:56

Thanks @IroningThrone

He is 4 - I do say this.

OP posts:
MumonabikeE5 · 20/12/2024 19:53

How old are they? Surely 8/9/10
old enough for cause and consequence.
going back in the house only works if going out is something they want to do.
so I would have a clear withdrawal of thing they do like.

is the seat well padded?
is the seat belt well positioned.
have you got a good kid friendly podcast or audio book on?

my kids hate the car .

Original poster
Nosnowjustrainandwind · 20/12/2024 19:51

IroningThrone · 20/12/2024 19:49

Buy a dog crate then.

Why post it you're just going to ignore everyone's help?

Show quote history

Because everyone’s telling me what I should do to stop him climbing out of the booster seat and I’m asking for alternatives TO the booster seat!

OP posts:
Original poster
Nosnowjustrainandwind · 20/12/2024 19:50

Hollietree · 20/12/2024 18:22

Do you want people to say “Oh well just drive him around in your car without a booster seat or a seat belt on, he clearly won’t do as he’s told, so just go for it.” Or “I have this magical device that freezes my child so that they can’t move while in their car seats, problem solved.”

Because neither is going to happen.

Clearly not. What I’m asking is quite simple - the booster seat is a no go and looks like this will be the case for a long time so I need an alternative. At the moment he has an old car seat I can use but he won’t fit in it forever and tbh I hadn’t budgeted for a replacement but obviously needs must.

OP posts:
IroningThrone · 20/12/2024 19:49

Nosnowjustrainandwind · 20/12/2024 19:48

He doesn’t undo the seatbelt, just climbs out of it.

He doesn’t care if you lose your shit.

He doesn’t care if you stop the car.

He doesn’t care if you don’t go anywhere (the rest of us however …)

He. Does. Not. Care.

Buy a dog crate then.

Why post it you're just going to ignore everyone's help?

Original poster
Nosnowjustrainandwind · 20/12/2024 19:49

IroningThrone · 20/12/2024 18:23

Not ideal, but after my nephew let himself out of his seat three times while we were 200+ miles from home I found an empty, waited until he started to stand up, and braked sharply. Was only doing about 10pmh but it was enough to really scare him and he's never done it since.

Tried that. Still does it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Nosnowjustrainandwind · 20/12/2024 19:48

He doesn’t undo the seatbelt, just climbs out of it.

He doesn’t care if you lose your shit.

He doesn’t care if you stop the car.

He doesn’t care if you don’t go anywhere (the rest of us however …)

He. Does. Not. Care.

OP posts:
chocomoccalocca · 20/12/2024 19:20

If the issue is he undoes the seat belt you can get things to plug into the buckle so they can't undo it. Not ideal but if you did it for a bit he might then not realise when you stop. I have one for my SEN child when he become so deregulated I can't get him to stay in his car seat

TunipTheVegimal24 · 20/12/2024 18:57

I know I will be flamed for this, but here we go...mine get smacked if they undo their seat belts. The only time they get smacked, is if they're purposefully doing something very unsafe, that they know they're not allowed to do. My 3yo learnt to take theirs off during a long car journey, on a motorway, when I was halfway between my house and my parents, so I couldn't "not go out", as was already out! I only had to do it a couple of times ever, and now neither of them ever take their seat belts off. I personally (although others will be along shortly to disagree), think the very, very occasional smack, is better than risking them dying in a car accident. That is, if you have exhausted every other avenue, as you say you have.

DarkAndTwisties · 20/12/2024 18:56

I probably wouldn't win any parenting awards, but undoing the car seat was the one thing I just absolutely lost my shit over. I generally never yell, which made it more effective I think. But I really yelled - she unbuckled herself on the smart motorway near us, so nowhere to pull over. It's a safety issue, it's non-negotiable, and I just wasn't having it.

NiftyKoala · 20/12/2024 18:42

Stormyweatheroutthere · 20/12/2024 16:35

Simply go back inside the house.. Shame he wil miss out on xyz because he can't sit still.

This it may take a few times, it'll be a pain but oh well. He needs to know safety comes first and he is not in charge.

IroningThrone · 20/12/2024 18:25

IroningThrone · 20/12/2024 18:23

Not ideal, but after my nephew let himself out of his seat three times while we were 200+ miles from home I found an empty, waited until he started to stand up, and braked sharply. Was only doing about 10pmh but it was enough to really scare him and he's never done it since.

Just want to say I was absolutely desperate, had no way of getting another seat and he was already in a harnessed seat.

sanityisamyth · 20/12/2024 18:24

Nosnowjustrainandwind · 20/12/2024 18:06

Look, it doesn’t work, he doesn’t care. I’m not getting my other child’s hopes up for her day to be ruined either or spending a pointless fortune. I don’t have another adult.

You don't have to spend any money or book anything. You're not getting their hopes up for nothing. They're the ones undoing their seat belt and being dangerous in the car. Just go for a drive and then stop the car if they misbehave. Even if you're just driving to the shop or the park.

IroningThrone · 20/12/2024 18:23

Not ideal, but after my nephew let himself out of his seat three times while we were 200+ miles from home I found an empty, waited until he started to stand up, and braked sharply. Was only doing about 10pmh but it was enough to really scare him and he's never done it since.

Hollietree · 20/12/2024 18:22

Do you want people to say “Oh well just drive him around in your car without a booster seat or a seat belt on, he clearly won’t do as he’s told, so just go for it.” Or “I have this magical device that freezes my child so that they can’t move while in their car seats, problem solved.”

Because neither is going to happen.

Londonrach1 · 20/12/2024 18:22

Parent your child...if doesn't go in seat you don't go out. Tbh at 4 he shouldn't be in a booster but a proper car seat. Unless got sens he 4 you the parent...he goes in seat or you don't go anywhere..

LittleOwl153 · 20/12/2024 18:19

The cybex ones have some higher weight rated seats too ...

Original poster
Nosnowjustrainandwind · 20/12/2024 18:15

Ah well he doesn’t care.

OP posts:
user2848502016 · 20/12/2024 18:10

@Nosnowjustrainandwind sorry not trying to be mean - this is just what I would be saying to him that's all!

user2848502016 · 20/12/2024 18:09

Nosnowjustrainandwind · 20/12/2024 16:41

I suppose what I’m asking is what happens when he’s outgrown the old car seat completely. Not going in the car isn’t an option; I have to go to work and he has to go to school.

This might not even be an issue, a few months will make a lot of difference to his maturity level

Original poster
Nosnowjustrainandwind · 20/12/2024 18:07

user2848502016 · 20/12/2024 18:07

Put him back in his old car seat for now. Children who act like babies in cars must sit in baby car seats....

Why are you saying this to me?

OP posts:
user2848502016 · 20/12/2024 18:07

Put him back in his old car seat for now. Children who act like babies in cars must sit in baby car seats....

Swipe left for the next trending thread