Autism concerns Can I have a second pair of eyes please

OP isn't being over-anxious - but maybe the HV is. I'd say to the HV to hold off for at least a year before she refers to a paediatricion.

My eldest is autistic and couldn't do any of the things on your list at 22 months. He had probably 6 words.
BUT he's a boy and autism is not the same in boys and girls.

Also - kindly - that is not a picky eater!!

You need to get your anxiety under control, your daughter sounds absolutely fine. You need to get a grip on this or you will colour her approach to life as she picks up on your anxiety. That is the problem here. Her diet is amazing for a two year old btw,

This is normal. Are you addressing your anxiety over this?

I agree with others. That isn't a picky eater.

I don't see anything to be concerned about? Sounds alright to me. I kind of wish my two year old son was saying that much. He only says less than ten and is three soon.

Are you in the uk. Your child sounds perfectly normal so I am surprised she has been referred to a paediatrician.

Toe walking isn't an issue under 2, neither is being a bit shy or being a bit picky with food. She's only a toddler, my advice would be to just enjoy her and try to stop obsessing about ASD.

However from what you've stated on here, none of that rings any bells for me as a parent to a DD with ASD

There's a lot of carbs and processed stuff in her diet but certainly not as much as the average picky eating small child.

Does she flap her hands or repeatedly open & close her hands?
If you point at something will she follow and look at what you're pointing?
This is the age I began having concerns about my DD and she was diagnosed at 4. It's a long process but if you genuinely have concerns then take her to your local Speech & Language drop in (shouldn't need GP referral) and ask their professional opinion. This is the route you would mostly likely have to go down to begin the diagnosis pathway anyway, area depending. That's how our process begins locally. No GP involved at all.

no signs of autism there.

For comparison, one of my DCs lived on plain Cheerios for about nine months. After that, their diet was very limited up to age 18. Now as an adult, will eat anything.

The rest of my DCs (four others) were all very picky - wouldn't eat anything green, wouldn't eat anything with certain textures (mushroom / banana texture), wouldn't eat fish, hated various different potato presentations, insisted on certain pasta shapes on grounds that they tasted right and all others tasted wrong. Wouldn't eat fruit, and on and on and on. All eat normally now apart from one who is still extremely picky and would happily survive on chocolate, Genoa salami, and cheap white bread.

None of them ND.

None of that sounds worrying at all. Her diet is very good. Her speech is normal.

Are you generally an anxious person?

@Firstimemum24 So my son is 18 now and for his entire life there has only been one kind of sandwich, a peanut butter and jam sandwich. No other sandwich exists, no other sandwich should be made / eaten / looked at. When he was 2 there was screaming at a cheese and jam sandwich "take it off take it off!" (the jam) .Etc

And he doesn't even have an official diagnosis. I just thought I'd share this with you because it is this kind of rigidity that lends itself to an Autism diagnosis, not the varied and wonderful selection of foods your child is willing to eat.

Baby walkers / jumperoos can cause toe walking if used in excess

She is not technically a picky eater. That’s a good, healthy, varied diet at that age.

Toe walking is normal until 5. If she is toe walking at 5 bring her to a doctor. By 5, It can be a sign of lots of things (or nothing) and isn’t an official “tick box” item for Autism.

just keep reading to her, bringing her places and communicating with her. She doesn’t have any red flags and seems to be developing normally.

This! My autistic DS ate toast, potatoes, ham and chicken nuggets. Nothing else. Your DC’s diet sounds great for a child who isn’t yet two. Nothing in your description points to autism apart from the toe walking. Lots of non-autistic children are toe walkers.

Can't see any problems there. Was your HV happy at the 2 year check (if you've had this? My dc's was around 22 months).
I wouldn't expect a 2 year old to have a "back and forth conversation". Closer to 3 for that.

Do you have autism in your or you dh's family? Otherwise I'm a bit surprised why you are worried, her diet is great, she interacts and communicates. Some people are shy so some babies are shy. Some babies take longer to build a fuller vocabulary. Does she like books? Being read to? Music? Swimming? Can she have find and enjoy herself? If yes to all these plus her diet is good there is no need to worry until you feel her communication skills are lagging behind. Does she have plenty of toys to develop motor skills.

One tips, do not use your phone, tablet or TV as a babysitter. It's so harmful, especially smaller devices but also current hyper content watched on TV

Am not sure what to say. Toddlers are just learning that there is more to eating than milk. Some embrace it. Others are horrified or simply don't like. Most go up and down with their yummy and yucks like a drunk yo-yo. Your kid is doing well with a varied and healthy diet.

Honestly stop worrying and enjoy your child. Neither my autistic child nor my non autistic child had any language at all at 22 months! No pointing to indicate either. Back and forth language is not typical until well into 2, and not considered late until 3+

My autistic child eats pasta (only certain shapes; must never have even touched a sauce), 3 specific fruits (only chopped in a certain way), particular brands of breakfast cereal and sometimes some toast (if type of bread is correct and toasting done perfectly) so no that diet is not an issue. Even my NT one doesn't eat that variety. All you can do is keep a note of all concerns and behaviours which will be useful if you end up in diagnosis process but even if you had a diagnosis I doubt it would help you that much - we got a diagnosis, signposting to support groups and a bit of advice on approaches (lots of which I had already found through my own research).