Aibu ti be slightly annoyed with DH for taking a Covid test

You cracked on socialising with what you thought was a cold. A cold for some people can be unpleasant especially if they are immunosuppressed, pregnant, elderly. You sound quite selfish.

I think it is a thing you are aware of if you have vulnerable or elderly relatives who you care for or see regularly; if you are vulnerable yourself; if you lost someone too soon to Covid; if you had Covid badly yourself in any of the waves.

Others nay not be aware of it at all.

You're not the boss, OP.

I certainly wouldn't let my OH tell me whether I could or couldn't take a test and I very much doubt your DH physically held you down and rammed the test stick up your nose, either!

It's really rather childish to be irked by an adult taking a test because you'd rather not know the result.

always surprised when people say no one is testing. I am, my friends are, many of my colleagues are. It’s good to know and then just work from home. Long Covid is still a thing and there’s no need to risk someone getting something so debilitating when we have tests that aren’t expensive and way to do. Imagine cancer was the result of an infectious disease, with just a small risk every time you passed on the disease. And people passed it on because people can’t be bothered testing.

I didn't even know that taking a COVID test was still a thing tbh.

I still test for covid when I’ve got a cold. If someone I know is positive for covid I’d still like to know so I can avoid them. It can still be really nasty

Tell people. Covid and Flu cases are up massively, both can be fatal to older and people with compromised immune systems. We are back wearing masks at work (im a hospital nurse), we are working way beyond capacity due to covid and flu and the amount of patients needing to be admitted and isolated. This year is far worse than last year already. The flu vaccine is less effective this season which isnt helping, but people passing covid around is also contributing. Its obviously not at 2020/2021 levels, and hopefully never will be again, but it is a bad year, and people need all the information to protect themselves and their loved ones.

The 80 year old may not be able to ‘just carry on’ - so for her sake at least, you need to tell her, check she has had her booster, and be ready to get medical help quickly if she catches it. Hopefully the good hygiene and distancing you will have followed anyway, because you had a cold, will protect her.

We are all just getting on with it - the official advice is that you don’t need to test. I think you should just carry on as if you didn’t know it was covid.

I hope your mum and any other elderly members of the family have at least had Covid and Flu booster jabs? If not, this could be the push they need to get them - last appointments are this Friday for the free rollout.

But no one is even doing that now.

Well YES OP, many people are still testing if they get a 'cold', 'flu', 'feel unwell'!!! Only last week I tested (negative for covid) when I developed a sore throat, snotty nose and cough. I'm still recovering. I didn't think 'Oh, I'm clearly unwell with 'something' but I'll head off to a show to spread it around, go out with colleagues and visit my elderly mother and family!!!' 🙄

Even if you didn't test and know its covid, its still selfish to continue to socialise when unwell! Your colleagues/people at the show might have elderly/immunosuppressed people they are seeing over Christmas. Even if they don't- who wants to catch a cold from someone, especially at Christmas?

Proper protective gear made freely available for the vulnerable should have been the direction of travel rather than the one that was taken.

If I feel rough I wouldn't be visiting frail relatives. No matter what virus I'm carrying, wouldn't want them to get it. So it doesn't really matter if I'd test negative to covid, I still wouldn't go when feeling ill.

I need antivirals if I get covid. They have to be given as early as possible so I'd want to know if I'd been in contact so I could test myself.

Covid is not the virus it used to be, in fact there are worse flu viruses going around that aren't tested for. Just because it's covid, doesn't make it worse.
I do get cheesed off though when out and about and hear people who are obviously suffering still out and about nearby. I think generally there is less tolerance to people who go around spreading their viruses- quite right too, we should all have learnt that there's no need to spread the misery around. So if feeling unwell, some consideration for others would be good - which would not involve turning up to an 80th, where likely lots of vulnerable older people likely attend. Listing your extensive activities almost sounds like you are showing off how many people you could possibly expose. Well done you, it's probably loads, but it doesn't make a difference if it's covid or another virus, it's still inconsiderate to others - but as long as you get to do your activities?
Your DH's test is irrelevant, it's just as reckless with a negative result.

You seem remarkably sure that no one else is testing anymore. I would 100% still test if I had any “cold” and was seeing anyone I knew to be vulnerable. I would also generally avoid seeing anyone as old as 80 if I had a cold anyway, although I appreciate you say it was your Mum’s big birthday - I’d probably let her decide in that scenario (but would also test first).

This is yet another example in my pot of 'people never learn'.

Over 2 years of mass messaging about covering your mouth when you cough, staying away from people when you have a spreadable illness, washing your hands.

And here we are with people knowingly going to large public events with a 'cold', visiting vulnerable relative. Every day I see people coughing without covering their mouths, merrily and disgustingly spreading their germs.

It might not make a difference to you, but it would make a massive difference to anyone elderly or with a compromised immune system. For them, a normal cough or cold could feel like the flu. Covid could put them in hospital. Isn’t that enough to make you want to change your behaviour?

You don't have to make a formal announcement, just stay away from people outside your household. You may find that telling people individually is helpful, so they don't assume there's some personal reason for your absence. COVID still exists and still is dangerous even though there is no state of emergency. Surely you don't need Boris Johnson standing over you with a pint glass Fixed Penalty Notice in order to behave responsibly and considerately?

In primary, you would know the personal circumstances of your class much more and - whatever the guidance - most would make compassionate and sensible adaptations both for their own relatives’ case and for their pupils’.

I don’t it abnormal for you to be cautious. I’d do the same if I had vulnerable relatives. My best friend (late 40’s) has been unwell with long covid for over 18 months and it’s affected every part of her life. A cold would have been just that, over in a week. For her covid has ruined her life, and safe for another person I know, who has lost her career over it. Sure we can’t all hide away forever, but given I can work from home, I will test if I feel like I have covid as I don’t want to make people sick.

@arcticpandas

Disagree.

Most people I know do test especially if they're feeling really rough.

Of course it's personal choice nowadays, BUT many of us feel it's the right thing to do. Just because you don't agree, it doesn't mean those of us who do are in the wrong.

It's different thinking, risk taking and levels of personal responsibility. Each to their own and all that.