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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To quit my job rather than do this?

167 replies

WelshRambler · 17/12/2024 22:16

Hey all,

Looking for some unbiased advice. Every year my work hold a big event for a small charity the week before Christmas. It raises a lot of money and really makes a huge a difference to the charity. We literally raise more money for the charity in one hour than the charities get in a year. The charity changes every year.

This year I was asked to organise which charity we would partner with, which I duly did. I chose a lovely charity who were really excited. I then went on annual leave leaving both work and the charity with all details confirmed, travel organised etc. I’ve kept in touch with the charity on my time off and they’ve shared some really heart warming and heart wrenching stories that they would like to share. Everything seemed well.

Cue tonight. I’ve been asked by work to stand my charity down with one days notice because work has found a charity that they think will do better on socials.

AIBU to refuse to stand my charity down because 1) it’s wrong and 2) I’m on leave?

I’ve point blank messaged to say I won’t do it but honestly they might force me to. Also, if I don’t stand my charity down and they turn up I will be in big trouble.

I am going to fight this and genuinely would rather quit than do it.

Before anyone suggests it, it’s not possible to have both charities.

WWYD in this situation?

OP posts:
Obimumkinobi · 17/12/2024 23:43

I'd also wager that the beneficiaries of the dropped charity are unlikely to be shareholders of what I'm assuming is OP's corporate, so the "right" people won't be pissed off by this. This very poor behaviour won't affect their bottom line or the senior bods' bonuses, so sadly zero fucks will be given. I'm not sure ACAS or the Charity Commission will care either?

Move on, OP, you're clearly made of better stuff!

WillowTree33 · 17/12/2024 23:40

hydriotaphia · 17/12/2024 22:34

I agree with others that you should emphasise that it will be excruciatingly bad PR for them to cancel on this charity. I would also say that you are not willing to make the call to cancel, you are on annual leave. However I would provide your work colleague’s with the charity contact person’s details so that you are not blamed for them not being able to get in touch.

I think this is good advice and definitely emphasise what a huge huge reputational issue it would be to cancel on your charity. If your colleagues haven’t been in cc I would also consider passing on some of the messages you mention the charity sending with the stories and showing how excited they are. Hopefully that will make them feel guilty and start thinking about the impact on your charity too

Zonder · 17/12/2024 23:38

That's so mean. Can they do another fundraiser for the other charity in a few months?

DowntonCrabbie · 17/12/2024 23:36

WelshRambler · 17/12/2024 22:26

@DingDongAlong Pretty much bang on the money. Someone more senior did organise the other charity but they knew about the original charity as well.

The charity I made arrangements with is very small and doesn’t really have a social media presence. Not sure they’d been vindictive enough to do anything if I did stand them down tbh.

If I were you I'd tell them I would personally put it out all over socials, and call every paper as well.

SleepPrettyDarling · 17/12/2024 23:35

You’re absolutely right to stand your ground on this. To be clear, you were given the task of organising the event and have done so. You were given a position of trust, and empowered to make the commitment on behalf of your company.

Toomanyemails · 17/12/2024 23:29

They're coming at it from a corporate perspective. Not a great approach to charity work, but you need to approach from the same perspective.
"New Charity sounds like a great cause for us to support in future, but for this event we need to stick with Original Charity. We can't let down a charity at such short notice, especially when they've already put time into preparing material (the photos and quotes they've sent will be great for our social posts) - it goes against the ethos of the event and could even bring us negative publicity."

Obimumkinobi · 17/12/2024 23:27

I agree this is outrageous and would certainly review my future with a company who did this.
But sadly, this won't be the catastrophic PR disaster that some PPs are predicting. And in the unlikely event it ever came to light, it would be explained away as a "misunderstanding/miscommunication". Whilst a charity would be privately pissed off, they're not going to publicly spoil their chances with other future potential donors.

Governments get away with much worse and at the end of the day, the majority of the public don't give a shit. Pension, anyone?!

venusandmars · 17/12/2024 23:27

@WelshRambler That is awful!

The (small?) charity that you had chosen will have put time, and money into preparing for this. That is money that comes from their voluntary donations. They may have made forward plans and commitments based on the agreement.

If your company rescind on the arrangement (was there not some formal contract?) they will have wasted the volountary donations given to support the charity's purpose. Your company will have, in effect taken from them, rather than giving to them.

I'd quit from a company that did this. And I'd go to the press.

From being involved in similar things I can only imagine that there is a popular 'issue of the moment' (possibly in the mainstream news) that will have everyone at the event thinking that they have solved the world problem (oh the warm feels!)

Beesandhoney123 · 17/12/2024 23:27

Just because your company haven't announced it on social media doesn't mean its not common knowledge in the real world where journalists love a story, where real people go on social media and say x said it was us! And dumped us!

Email to your personal email all correspondence including what's app screen shots.

Surely your co workers are taken aback?

Ps- taking annual leave? Ffs, say no. Either it's paid or in lieu. Unbelievable.

EwwSprouts · 17/12/2024 23:24

The charity they want you to dump may not have socials but I guarantee they have a great local network. That is how small charities survive. There will be reputational damage to your company if there is a last minute swop after all the lead up.

FoxtonFoxton · 17/12/2024 23:24

I quit a job once with immediate effect after finding out the boss (total cock) was getting me to bill clients for work he hadn't done. It was just something I couldn't get over, so I get where you are coming from OP. Sometimes you just have to stand your ground and go with what you believe in. Good luck, I really hope they do the right thing.

AdoraBell · 17/12/2024 23:21

Definitely stand your ground. They asked you to arrange this, you did the work. If they wanted a different charity they should have selected a charity before asking you to do the work.

ReadingSoManyThreads · 17/12/2024 23:20

It would be worth calling ACAS in the morning for some advice on this, regarding your position if you quit over this, employment tribunal etc.

It's refreshing to read about someone having so much integrity. Seems lacking these days sadly. Good for you, I'd do the same.

IndifferentFeet · 17/12/2024 23:20

Holidaywarning · 17/12/2024 22:23

Id go back and ask if the potential damage on 'socials' has been considered. I can't imagine it being a very positive story, promising a charity and then dumping them,

This. It will be terrible PR for it to get out that your organisation dumped a charity like this right before the event. Make that clear and say it's a reputational risk you were not prepared to take.

Bee23 · 17/12/2024 23:19

Have they considered whether they’re going to break any charity legislation?

DangerPigeon · 17/12/2024 23:19

Happy to screw over a small charity for better PR? That's pretty callous.

commonsense61 · 17/12/2024 23:18

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

WelshRambler · 17/12/2024 23:17

NornIsland · 17/12/2024 23:12

Whats in this for the other Sr Manager - do they have any family or financial conflict of interest with the 2nd charity?

No I don’t think they do. I believe they saw it in the local press a while back.

I think they believe it could potentially be spun into a running campaign for the company to get behind, maybe get some PR for the company as well…

OP posts:
DoYouReally · 17/12/2024 23:16

I think your best chance here to go hard on potential reputation although damage.

One post on X, from the charity or anyone who potentially knows about the previous plan, could do viral.

Ask management if they are comfortable with the fact that they are leaving themselves wide open to the accusation that they are untrustworthy, have screwed over a charity, who are largely dependenton fundraising for their survival, who will now lose out on money to provide support to the most vulnerable in society. Furthermore, they left them with too little notice to make alternative plans, and now those the charity supportive will be leave without food/shelter/support etc.

If the company you work with has an corporate mission, purpose and values statements - cite them too etc.

Ask if your legal/compliance/conduct teams have signed off on this last minute change and confirmed that it falls either acceptable risk parameters and have a plan in the event of reputation damage, loss of customers, erosion of trust, potential impact on revenue etc.

I would lay it on thick.

AtmosAtmos · 17/12/2024 23:15

What a dreadful thing they want you to do. I can completely understand why you would prefer to resign. Hopefully they back down - keep proof of how you have communicated with management in getting the charity agreed.

very boring but can you afford to lose your job in whichever way that might happen? You would need qualified legal advice on what if any employment law rights you have. Instinctively and morally it feels this should breach contract and be constructive dismissal or unfair dismissal if you are sacked. However that doesn’t mean it actually is the law. Even if it is that will take time to prove anything.

How easily would you find a new job and do contacts matter and any references matter.

WelshRambler · 17/12/2024 23:13

valentinka31 · 17/12/2024 23:10

Have you actually replied? Otherwise as other poster said, don't reply. You are on AL.

Yes, it was via WhatsApp on a small group chat. I replied almost instantly because I was so shocked. I said I can’t do it I spoke to X (the founder of the charity) today to confirm the details and they are so excited to be taking part.

OP posts:
NornIsland · 17/12/2024 23:12

Whats in this for the other Sr Manager - do they have any family or financial conflict of interest with the 2nd charity?

WelshRambler · 17/12/2024 23:10

lionloaf · 17/12/2024 23:08

Forward the correspondence you’ve had with the charity (including the stories) on to whoever has asked you to say no to them, and just put that you can’t do it as it’s all already arranged as per below.

I’m going to do this. The correspondence includes emotional photos/stories from the charity.

OP posts:
valentinka31 · 17/12/2024 23:10

Have you actually replied? Otherwise as other poster said, don't reply. You are on AL.

VaddaABeetch · 17/12/2024 23:08

Des your company have Values that they publish? Something like fairness, transparency, courage?

asj how reneging on a charity at the last minute espouses those values? How will that reflecting the company? How will it make employees feel