To completely go against DH beccause I think his opinion is ridiculous

To be fair, having a kick-around with his mates in the playground is different from going to a weekend/evening club.

I have football-obsessed children in my wider family who go to these clubs - they seem to spend a great deal of their time there (several times a week) and are always talking about it.

Luckily, their parents are also big football fans, but I'm so glad that my DS has never shown the remotest interest in football; it would bore me solid!

DH needs to get over it, he doesn't have to like football but he has to realise not all football fans are hooligans, and aren't obsessed either. DS is only 4 he might end up preferring another sport when he's older, for now it's just going to be a bit of fun for him.

I think YANBU. Why not take him and see how he goes and also try out a couple of other ball sports too - tennis or rugby tots? I get your DH's pov but your DS doesn't sound like he's going to turn from a quiet shy 4 year old into a football hooligan! It's a good sport to get reasonable at because they seem to play it in the playground at school and the park as they get older so it almost guarantees he'll have someone to play with at break times and is such an ice breaker. DS never played too much at primary but does at secondary and has a close group of friends who like a casual kick about. I think he would have found friendships easier at primary if he'd been one of the football kids.

I’d take him if it’s something he ends up loving your partner will need to just get over it.

I grew up in Glasgow seen the negatives of drinking and sectarianism and how football was used to fuel that but I was able to separate the bigotry and violence from the sport ( especially when kids are involved) and didn’t grow up to hate the sport.

I loathe football and even more I hate kids football because it attracts a certain kind of over competitive, aggressive parent.

Having said that as a parent of two quiet very shy, nerdy boys it was probably good for them. It helped them fit in a bit more with the other boys.
Not at 4 though. 7 or 8 is plenty soon enough.

DH also absolutely hates football, for similar reasons. He was very against our sons playing. Not so much a kick about in the park, but anything official, training with a club for example.

Our youngest decided he wanted to join a club and DH was very against it. I just took him anyway. I also bought him a football strip (country, not club) and he was very annoyed about that and refused to let DS wear it out with him. I told him he was being a complete arse in no uncertain terms. In the end, DS lost interest and became more involved in another sport (thankfully one DH approved of),so it wasn’t an ongoing problem.

I’m afraid if I think DH is wrong about something, I won’t support it if it involves stopping the boys from trying something they are interested in. I would just take your son anyway OP.

It's quite a big step (kick?)from toddler football club and being a football hooligan so I agree with you but if your dh feels that strongly then I wouldn't take him, encourage other interests

I hated F1 growing up, loathed it completely as my step dad made every race weekend all about bloody f1. Same stories being retold all the time and it was SO AWFUL.

my 16yo dd is now obsessed with f1. So much so, she’s gone into engineering and wants to work in f1. I came into a little bit of money and after a very tough year for her I have surprise booked Silverstone for next year. Not just a day ticket but a full 4 day premium grandstand and I’m taking her with her dad and grandad. I know bugger all about f1, artist from the cars go zooon,zzzzzoom, crash, zzZooomz. And I can’t wait. Because it will make her absolute year. And my priority is my daughter and her happiness and dreams. Not my own childish hang ups from my own boring f1 obsessed dad . It’s KILLING ME keeping this secret until Xmas day! And it wasn’t cheap, I could have took her to Disney just me and her instead but that’s not what she wanted.

I with your DH in the hatred of football having grown up in a football obsessed family. However he shouldn't impose that on his child or he's just as bad with his obsession. I took my DS to football twice a week until he thankfully chose to give it up.

Going to add that my child asked to go although I was reluctant. I grew up with a negative association with football being stuck in pubs until past our bedtime with my mum and her abusive alcoholic partner. For women in abusive relationships the score plays a massive role in whether she's beaten that night or not. So I've steered clear of it since childhood because I don't want my children to experience that. Deep rooted trauma like that needs work.

Are you in Glasgow by any chance?

Regardless it's just a game when little kids are involved ( I think...) Take him and let it play out (if you'll excuse the pun).

I have to say I agree with @Tarraleah I hate football. I hate the culture, everything that goes with it. Kids football is even worst, with pushy competitive parents who haven't kicked a ball in their life but try to leave their dream through their kids. It's awful.
That said
football is VERY popular with kids, especially boys. Knowing the basics and how to kick a ball is a good social skill, it really is. I know posters will jump saying it's not true for their precious boy, but in real life, it does help kids to be involved A LOT.

Having said that, football is very different from martial arts, which you said your DS tried but wasn't interested in. Has he tried other ball team sports? Volleyball, basketball, hockey, handball etc? I think, as your DH is so against it, I would exhaust all other choices first. If he's good at sport, he will pick up football when he's at school without too much trouble. Any sport is beneficial at this age, and won't stop him in the future if he decides he wants to play.

I think YABU given how strongly your DH feels about it and that your DS hasn't actually asked to play. If your DS was actively asking then I'd have a different opinion.

But there is a bit of a collective madness around football games (whether playing or spectating) and it being the be all and end all of life, that most other sports don't have as part of their culture. So whilst I wouldn't stop my kid playing if they wanted to, I certainly wouldn't encourage it if they weren't asking to. They won't escape being exposed to it in a few years, so I'd try to steer them to something else over it if I could!

THIS

I could have written your post. My Dad and my dh are exactly the same. I think you should let him try it, experience it and your dh needs to appreciate and understand that people have different opinions to his, it doesn't mean anyone is in the right or wrong, but the biggest favour your dh could do is teach your ds that even if you don't agree with someone's opinion they are still entitled to them.

I can see where your DH is coming from. I hate football, too, on a similar (perhaps less vocal) level as your DH does. Don't like the fans, the violence, the fact domestic violence increases during certain games.

But on the other hand, would I ban it? I don't know. It hasn't come up as DS and DD aren't interested either; they do other sports, though they've both joined in football games with friends and didn't enjoy it. DH also hates it. I asked him what he'd do, and he's equally torn.

Have you asked your DS if he wants to play more? Or asked if he could play 3 sports, one including football, which would he choose? Then go with his answer. If it's football...well, it's his choice then.

I also loathe football for the same reason as your DH ( my dad was a very angry man and i can't watch any sport as a result of listening to my dad rage about all of it). HOWEVER my DH loves footie and my DS is obsessed with it and plays at academy level. I don't like going to watch him because i find some of the behaviour of parents far too similar to my dad. But my DH is a kind gentle man who never raises his voice and is not one of those parents. Football has been amazing for DS and both DS and DH understand why I don't get involved. Could your DH tolerate it if you did most of the watching?

And this is the problem, the media are not interested in the vast majority, just the few trouble makers. I went for years as a child, only ' violence' I saw was from my Mum who accidentally knocked a copper's hat off, back when they wore tall helmets! He said he would arrest her if our team lost, luckily we won. That was when it was almost all standing and a very average game for 50 000 fans, sardines lived in luxury.
Why did violence morph into college, predictive text makes no sense!

My son was severely bullied all through school. It was started by a male school teacher when my son was about six and was the only boy in the class who did not play football and wasn't particularly interested. His father was also not into it so I suppose that's why. The teacher started it by ridiculing my son in class in front of his classmates and this continued all through secondary school, for seemingly unrelated things, but I feel this was down to that teacher in primary school making my son "different" to everyone else.
Playing football as a small boy may be the ONLY thing he has in common with his peers and will also teach him crisis management.
He definitely should do it.

It's one thing for a kid to not partake in football because it doesn't interest him, but another thing to actually ban him from doing it when he wants to. When he's at school and his mates want to have a kick around at breaktime (and I used to work in a primary and know what a big thing it is for many boys - not being sexist, it's just what I observed) is he supposed to say, no thank you, I'm not allowed to play football?
Your DH is being way OTT.

I hate football. I hate the culture, everything that goes with it. Kids football is even worst, with pushy competitive parents who haven't kicked a ball in their life but try to leave their dream through their kids. It's awful.

That said

football is VERY popular with kids, especially boys. Knowing the basics and how to kick a ball is a good social skill, it really is. I know posters will jump saying it's not true for their precious boy, but in real life, it does help kids to be involved A LOT.

So if your kid wants to play, good grief, let him. His dad shouldn't be selfish.

Even more importantly, if a child shows interest in a reasonable sport LET HIM! (If it was base jumping, your husband would have a point). Sport is so important! The competitive spirit in teams by players who are actually mediocre is depressing, but that's life.

Remind your husband it's not about him, it's about his child, who has his own personality and interest. Your husband and yourself will make sure he's not raised in the family of embarrassing hooligans.

Also worth reminding him that it's a preschool football class it's not a gateway into him being a yob, downing pints at the pub and shouting at the TV.

True for now - but it starts somewhere, doesn't it?

It's by no means all older lads and men who love football, but there's a huge culture in this country based around identifying as a football fan, almost as a religion, and all of the negative behaviours that seem to go hand in hand with it so often.

Personally, I'm not a fan of any sport - I find it dull and uninteresting as a concept - but just about every other sport seems to have the vast majority of fans and players acting respectfully, measured, not yobbish and not basing their entire personality around it. Sadly, the same cannot be said for football.

YANBU but then I’m a huge football fan and DS has gone to little football ‘classes’ since he was 18 months. I can’t wait to take him to his first game.

Disliking football is one thing but forbidding it is just ridiculous.

I absolutely detest everything about football, but even I think he’s being a bit ridiculous.

My DH also loathes football for all the same reasons. I don't care for it. We share responsibility for taking our two football mad DC to weekly training and matches because that what you do when you have kids - your own taste in activities is irrelevant.